When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Golf Clubs

golf_club_buybackTwo kinds of golf clubs, actually: the attempted-murder weapon was a golf club, probably an iron, and the crime scene was a golf club too, specifically the Indian Creek Golf Club in Carrollton, Texas, and even more specifically, the putting green of the 16th hole.

As a foursome was winding up their putting on Friday, an impatient golfer in the following foursome drove his ball right into their midst. The New York Daily News:

Victim - before.

Victim Plumlee – before.

The shot was an example of the breach of decorum golfers refer to as “hitting into” a group rather than waiting for all of them to complete their shots. Police said Michael Plumlee, the eventual victim, threw the ball off the green.

Perp.

Perp, Sivilay.

Witnesses said Sivilay [Kevin Keo Sivilay, 42, a member of the second foursome] responded by smacking Plumlee in the back of his head with a club, knocking him to the ground, according to Carrollton police. Investigators believe Sivilay hit Plumlee once or twice in the back with the fairway iron as he writhed on the ground in pain.

The head blow caused a skull fracture, but Plumlee’s going to live. So is Sivilay, but he’s going to be doing his living behind bars for a while.

Victin, after, 1. He remains hospitalized.

Victin, after, 1. He remains hospitalized.

Victim, after, 2.

Victim, after, 2.

We’ve always said breaches of golf decorum were “maddening,” but apparently Sivilay sees “maddening” a little more redly than we do. Come to think of it, having a dawdling foursome ahead of you can be infuriating, too. Not enough to try to bean-ball them, though; and if some guy tosses your ball, if you tried to bean-ball him, it serves you right; and even if you didn’t, that’s not sufficient excuse to beat him black and blue with a nine iron.

Plumlee, 27, suffered a brain injury and several broken ribs, his family told the TV station. He remained hospitalized Monday.

Police arrested Sivilay on charges of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. Investigators continued to review the beating Tuesday for possible additional charges against Sivilay or other members of his group, police told the Morning News.

If you leave the links in the black-and-white golf cart with no inside door handle, maybe this is not the soothing and relaxing sport for you.

FMI: Dallas Morning News.

14 thoughts on “When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Golf Clubs

  1. Alan Ward

    When I was young dumb and stupider, I had a similar incident happen. The course was jammed to the nuts, early in our short Alberta spring. Our foursome drove off then had to wait for the guys ahead of us to putt out. So while we stand waiting, a ball thuds down between us and hits my partner’s bag. I look around a some doing is still standing on the tee box looking for his drive. I holler back at him that some warning might have been nice , to which he responds with the flying birdie. So I address his ball and fire it back at him. The minute he sees me address the ball he begins to squawk and walk towards us. So I light it up and drop it between him and the tee box. Buddy now starts to run toward us. He gets about twenty yards away and stops in his tracks. Distance estimation was obviously not his strong suit as he assumed that I being the smallest guy in our foursome was on par with his size. He stood 5’6″ weighed about 140. Our foursome ranged from my 6’1″ 225, to our big guy at 6’7″ 320. The look on his face was priceless. His group came rapidly up behind him, hollering for him to apologize, which he did to which I accepted then offered my own apology with the offer of getting his ball for him. Crisis averted, fairway wood homicide avoided. All it cost me was the first two rounds in the clubhouse. When the story circulated at work, my principal told me he would never do anything so stupid. He merely goes over to the ball, id’s it for the asshat then puts the shaft of his putter on top of the ball and leans on it til it is good and buried. He is a 6’4 320 former CFL lineman, so I’m sure that would be a good 4-4″ in the turf.

  2. Loren

    I was playing an Australian course a few years ago in a threesome that had picked up a random guy who asked to play with us. The players ahead of us were very slow so our new guy decided to give them a spray (words) from a fairway back. Approaching the 19th hole one of those guys decides to pick a fight with……….. little ol innocent me.
    Course I’m not so little so it didn’t got well for him but now he wants to call the cops. All I wanted was a beer. Then the wife hears about it cause one of my buddies thinks it’s the funniest thing ever.
    Think I’ll stick to deer hunting.
    “an armed society is a polite society” Who said that and in what novel for 10 points.

    1. Boat Guy

      Heinlein. Starship Troopers.
      I’ve played this strange game twice. Probab ly won’t ever make a third effort. My two thoughts vis-a-vis golf and courses are a) that there’s a LOT of good rifle-range land going to waste and b) the only redeeming use for a golf course is “night-putting”.

      1. raven

        Most golf courses have adequate room for a rifle range, a motocross course AND a airstrip sufficient for most light aircraft. Of course a Helio Courier could probably get airborne in the sand trap….

  3. DSM

    After a creepy encounter on a post-Thanksgiving dinner walk it’s been double reinforced to always carry. I don’t golf and don’t plan to take it up but I’ve heard enough tales of stupidity, drunken or not, to encourage having something than just spiky shoes.

  4. bloke_from_ohio

    Isn’t there a saying about golf courses being terrible wastes of a potential rifle range?

  5. jeffronimo

    When the Scumbag-In-Chief began popularizing the sport for those who might succumb to his influence, I pretty much abandoned the game. Even on your best day a-golfing, it ain’t the pastime for the easily frustrated or impatient (like O’Bummer fans).

    That lack of civility won’t go away any faster on the course, than it will everywhere else. And it’ll probably get worse before it gets any better. When I do return to the game, I and my friends (we even have special rules for mulligans, like “offsetting fouls”) will amend the 14-club-in-bag rule to afford the addition of something of the 5.56 degree loft flavor.

  6. Aesop

    This was in Texas?
    How far have the mighty fallen.

    The perp looks far too pretty to have teed off on anyone’s foursome member.
    (And under victim-blaming, WTF? Why would you let an already-known @#$$hole within striking distance of you with a hand weapon? PPPPPPP)

    By the time the cops arrived, the perpetrator should have needed corrective surgery and dentistry not in evidence from that booking photo, such that playing golf after that point in life would involve countless hours of physical therapy, the tender ministrations of several medical specialties, and a non-zero number of artificial appliances for both subsequent mobility and chewing harder foods.

    The victim should stop playing golf with pussies.

    1. Hognose Post author

      People have laughed at me, “You’re carrying here?

      Yup. I try to avoid places I am best advised not to carry. I truly dislike flying anywhere through Boston Logan, as it means I not only can’t carry but I can’t even check my carry gun to my destination. (The State Police at Logan will arrest travelers for doing this, Federal law be damned, and the MA prosecutors enjoy the change of pace from the usual nitwit gang members).

      I think my sister in law would prefer I didn’t at her house, but, I don’t make a big production out of it, and neither does she. (Isn’t that the secret to getting along with the whole family?)

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