Gun Safety: Doing it Wrong

ND-shot-in-footThis story goes a long way to explain why Homo sapiens has not evolved into some benign master race. He’s been going in the other direction, as the first two words of the news headline suggests: “Florida Man…”

A Tampa police report says Joaquin Mendez, 23, put on the [allegedly bullet-proof] vest late Saturday and “wondered aloud whether it still worked.”

Police say his cousin, Alexandro Garibaldi, 24, pulled out a gun and responded, “Let’s see.”

Officers found Mendez outside the house with a gunshot wound in his chest. Mendez died at a hospital.

Well, we guess that’s a confirmed “no” on the bullet-proof bit. So it’s just an accident, if an unfortunate one. No one to arrest here, right?

Uh, wrong:

According to the report, Garibaldi initially told officers he found his wounded cousin after hearing a gunshot. However, police say a witness described Garibaldi shooting Mendez.

Police say the vest was found inside the house with a gunshot.

Garibaldi was held Sunday without bond on a manslaughter charge. Hillsborough County jail records didn’t show whether he had an attorney.

Moral of story: lying may work for people who have their name on skyscrapers or who have shadowy foundations full of slush money, incorporated in third-world tax havens like Canuckistan. But it probably isn’t going to work for you. That lie was probably the single element of the crime that catapulted Garibaldi from a negligent homicide rap that he could probably have plea-bargained down to a misdemeanor, and the manslaughter charge he’s wearing right now.

Mama Gump used to say, “Stupid is as stupid does.” No word on who was holding Garibaldi’s and Mendez’s beers, and watching this. 

12 thoughts on “Gun Safety: Doing it Wrong

  1. John M.

    “Moral of story: lying may work for people who have their name on skyscrapers or who have shadowy foundations full of slush money, incorporated in third-world tax havens like Canuckistan.”

    I wonder what Garibaldi lacks that those folks have. My guess is a brain.

    -John M.

  2. Tom Stone

    The man did a public service by raising the IQ of Florida Man by .000001% and should be rewarded with 5 years of free room and board courtesy of the state.

  3. Loren

    Why is the last name on these things never Knudsen or Walsh but always Fudenpucker or Mendez?
    Saw a great photo on Facebook yesterday but for the life of me could not pull it off of there. Had a cop using the pointy end of a pump shotgun holding his ass up.

    1. James F.

      If you Google “cop sitting on shotgun” you get this guy, a Johannesburg cop (0f undetermined race and ethnicity) photographed at a demo in 2010. It caused some discussion in the local press,

  4. Alan Ward

    Darwinism at its finest. Should he really be punished for prove the theory of survival of the fittest?

  5. McThag

    Technically I think it’s “Floridaman”, the press always gets it wrong too.

    He’s not the zero Florida needs.

    He’s the zero Florida deserves.

    He’s my neighbor.

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