Apparently Connecticut governor, red-diaper Dannell Malloy (his parents were too stoned to spell “Daniel”), may be on to something with his beloved gun bans. Why, the local criminals have had to resort to throwing parrots at the cops!
While being chased by a cop, a Connecticut man allegedly threw a parrot at his uniformed pursuer, who was bit on the hand when trying to shield himself from the feathered projectile.
Luis Santana, 32, was arrested Tuesday night on several charges, including assaulting a police officer, disorderly conduct, and animal cruelty.
A patrolman responding to a call about a fight encountered Santana on a Waterbury street around 10 PM. When Santana bolted, bird in hand, Officer Gary Kichar gave chase.
While fleeing, Santana turned and threw the white parrot at Kichar’s head. When the cop raised his hand to protect himself, the bird bit his finger.
Kichar was treated at the scene for the bird bite.
The parrot was initially turned over to animal control officials.
Santana was apprehended while hiding in a nearby building. Free on bond, he is scheduled for a November 18 court appearance.
Malloy is reportedly planning to add the family aves to the ban list. However there seems to be some difficulty establishing the chain of custody of the bird. It seems that Santana — the Curious-George-looking clown in the mugshot — neither acquired it at a federally licensed bird dealer, nor in a private sale at a bird show. To the shock of Governor Malloy, thieves like Santana have a whole other way of getting their hands on lethal assault parrots.
He stole the bird in a burglary earlier that evening.
No word on wherher Malloy is having the bird owner charged for not storing the parrot properly, and dunning him for the cost of the bitten cop’s workmen’s comp.
The parrot? He, she, or it, was not injured, is not pining for the fjords, and has been reunited with a happy owner. (The jewelry stolen in the burglary may take longer, but no one wanted Polly around the evidence room).