Category Archives: When Guns Are Outlawed…

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Sex Toys

The fashion-accessory baby of two gay guys died, essentially, of rape. Apparently with “marital aid” male, uh, objects, as well as male, er, organs. Violent internal injuries went untreated, and she bled out.

Now Dad Of The Year™ and DOTY™’s partner are pointing fingers at each other for the fatal buggery.

Kyhesha-Lee, three, died in 2013 after being subjected to prolonged sexual abuse so violent she bled into her nappy.

The toddler complained about pain to her dad, Matthew Lee Williamson, who claims he ‘didn’t think anything of it’.

Williamson has pleaded guilty to the manslaughter of his daughter, but denied fatally harming the child in Brisbane Supreme Court.

Williamson admitted using a rope to keep Kyhesha locked up but denies accusations of horrific abuse, including using a large sex toy on the girl, punching her in the stomach, posing with her while naked and pulling her ear until it bled.

In his testimony, Williamson said he did not take his daughter to a hospital despite her throwing up green vomit for days, visible bruising on her face and the blood in her nappy.

Kyhesha suffered an internal injury which became infected, the court was told this would have been so painful it’s likely she would not have been able to eat, drink or even move in the 12 hours leading up to her death.

She showed her father that she was bleeding from her genitals and said she ‘didn’t want any fingers up her bum anymore’.

Williamson said he didn’t seek medical attention for his daughter because he was concerned doctors would alert the authorities.

‘I was afraid I’d lose her to welfare… because of the state she was in,’ he said.

Not that that would have been a better outcome for the kid.

Prosecutor Phil McCarthy claims Williamson is lying to hide that he sexually abused his daughter – an accusation he denies.

When she died, Kyhesha lived in a flat with her father, Williamson, and Christopher Kent. The two men would engage in ‘unorthodox sexual conduct’ together, a court heard.

Kent, who pleaded guilty to manslaughter and received a two-year suspended sentence, told the court he witnessed Williamson abusing his daughter.

So how jacked up is Once Great Britain? The outcome of this case tells you:

  • Verdict: Guilty, Manslaughter.
  • Sentence: Two years. Suspended. 

But hey, guns are outlawed, so there’s no evil there… apart from these two monsters. At least one of whom will be back threatening children no later than 2019.

While Williamson says Kent is responsible for the abuse.

We say: believe both of them. And there is no sentence appropriate for a child sexual abuser but death. (Well, if you know the old joke, Death By Bongo).

The father’s case has been unexpectedly adjourned after Williamson’s defence barrister Michael Copley requested an investigation into a ‘psychological abnormality’ could have contributed to his conduct towards his daughter after she warned his of the pain after abuse.

via Dad admits killing daughter, 3, after sexual abuse so violent she bled into nappy | Metro News.

There is no “psychological abnormality” that can excuse, ameliorate or mitigate a father who, in conjunction with a partner, rapes his own child to death. That’s cognitive malfunction in must-be-turned-in-for-dismantling proportions.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Turmeric and Lemons

This is turmeric. We’ll leave the lemons to your imagination.

Ah yes, the scented Orient, where life is cheap, and some lives are cheaper than others. We’ll get to the turmeric and lemons; bear with us.

Four people have been arrested by police in the southeastern Indian state of Karnataka as part of an investigation into the suspected “human sacrifice” of a 10-year old girl to “cure” a paralysed man.

Among the detained is the girl’s neighbour and distant relative, named by Indian daily newspaper The Hindu as Mohammed Wasil, the secretary of a local mosque. The man and his sister had contacted a local “sorcerer” so their brother could be cured of a paralysis suffered following a stroke.

There’s always a Mohammed at the bottom of it, isn’t there?

The sorcerer said a young girl needed to sacrificed within 40 days, and chose 10-year-old schoolgirl Ayesha out of eight other proposed by Wasil. The police arrested the man, his sister, the sorcerer and a 17-year-old boy who helped Wasil abduct the girl.

“There are a few more people who have abetted the crime. We are investigating it from all angles. So more arrests cannot be ruled out,” senior police officer B Ramesh told BBC Hindi.

Wasil confessed to the crime after being interrogated by the police The girl was abducted on 1 March and her body was found two days later in a burlap sack on the outskirts of Magadi, a town 40km west of Bengalore.

Hey, what’s the big deal? His religion is just as culturally valid as yours. Hey, unlike the Archbishop of Canterbury, who was admittedly “post-Christian”, he probably actually believes his stuff.

“The accused took her to a tomb on Hosahalli road and slit her throat after performing a ritual,” said police officer Ramesh Bannoth, as quoted in The Hindu. The police suspect a black magic ritual was involved in her death as turmeric and lemons were found in the bag with the body.

Turmeric and Lemons. Jesus Christ. Well, actually, not Jesus Christ: that Arab imitator guy.

Wasil had participated in the efforts to find the girl and even went with the family to the police station to file a complaint, The Hindu reported. Ayesha’s aunt told the publication: “Wasil even prayed for the girl’s safe return and helped make an announcement about her missing at the nearby mosque.”

Such “black magic” rituals are not uncommon in India, particularly in rural areas where poorly-educated villagers are often persuaded into performing human and animal sacrifices by rogue monks.

via Mosque secretary and sister arrested for murder of 10-year-old girl in Indian ‘human sacrifice’.

Poorly-educated villagers. Rogue monks. Mosque secretaries.

Hey, but all religions are just the same, right?

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Gas

In Wales, where guns are tantamount to outlawed, a suicidal but creative Taffy can still try to go out with a bang.

As it was, William Flindell, somewhat the worse for both drink and fire, survived the gas explosion that he engineered to kill himself. It wasn’t completely without consequence, though, as he did manage to ruin his sex life — the explosion destroyed both of his hands.

William Flindell filled his flat with gas and set it off with a lighter after spending the day drinking, a court heard.

The huge explosion ripped the windows out of his living room and showered bricks and debris across the street in Newport, South Wales.

Flindell escaped with his life, but lost the use of both hands in the blast, suffered burns to 58 per cent of his body and was kept in hospital for two months.

It caused £200,000 of damage and also hurt two other people in the building at the time, who had minor injuries and were discharged from hospital the same day.

Of course, that’s not including two months in custody of the National Health, which cost Flindell’s fellow Britons a pretty penny, but at least made him healthy enough to go to prison, and cost the beleaguered British taxpayer even more.

Witness heard a man shouting ‘Get out, get out’ of the bedsit property before the explosion.

Cardiff Crown Court heard the front of the house on George Street was ‘completely blown apart’ and showered the street in bricks and debris.

Flindell admitted arson being reckless to whether life was endangered and told police in hospital: ‘I’m sorry I have done it, I wanted to kill myself.’

He told police he was drinking on his 50th birthday on April 2nd last year when he became depressed and plotted the explosion.

Sarah Waters, defending, said the blast was ‘drastic and uncharacteristic’.

Sure it was. And it’s a pretty good bet that “mittens” Flindell is not going to do it again. For one thing, he’s through turning 50, in this lifetime.

Although it does make you wonder how he’s going to top this one when it’s time to celebrate the big six-oh.

She said: ‘The effect this has had on him physically has been horrendous.’

Yeah, lawyers. “Have pity on my client as his bomb blew him up.”

Flindell was jailed for four and a half years for causing the explosion.

via Man blew up his own house in Wales because he was depressed at being 50 | Metro News.

Don’t remember what we did at Age 50. When the Blogbrother hit 50, he ordered the RV-12 kit, which seems a little more productive a celebration than making a human firework of yourself and your lodgings. But Wales is another country, and perhaps that is a quaint Welsh custom. (Come to think about it, quite a few Welsh got blown up, but that was whilst being led by Siegfried Sassoon at the Somme a century ago).

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Lycanthropy

All we can say is, where is Owen Zastava Pitt when you need him? Because we’re about to hear about Man’s Inhumanity to Man (well, Woman), Translupine Edition.

The IB Times has a story that would be News of the Weird and Supernatural — if it weren’t for the homicide that tipped it into the Crime column,

A Washington man accused of stabbing his mother to death told police he did so because he was a werewolf and she was a vampire. Sheaen Smith, 29, has been charged with the second-degree murder of his 57-year-old mother Aurora Buol-Smith after her body was found at her home in the 1500 block of McKenzie Avenue on 5 February.

Emergency services responded to a 911 distress call made by Smith. During the call, Smith made series of statements, including allegedly admitting “I stabbed her.” He also made a number of “delusional” claims on the phone, such as claiming he stabbed his mother because he was a werewolf and she was a vampire – a statement he allegedly repeated when officers found him in the bedroom of the house.

Hey, if some guy says he’s a werewolf, why not just believe him? A couple of silver bullets and the taxpayers have been saved a lot of expense. (Although some say any bullet will do).

A knife, which was thought to have been used in the murder, was also recovered from the scene.

While appearing at Whatcom Superior Court to face the charges, Chief Criminal Deputy Prosecutor Eric Richey said Smith had been released from St Joseph hospital following a drug-induced psychosis a matter of days before his mother was killed.

Yeah, what do you think led to that release? Pick one:

  1. He was cured by the medical laying-on of hands!
  2. His 72 days of Medicaid psych coverage was used up and they wouldn’t get paid to treat him any longer;
  3. The ACLU was about to sue for mean ol’ St. Joe’s Hospital denying him his civil rights;
  4. The howling was disturbing the other patients in the nut ward;
  5. So, he identifies as a werewolf, what’s the problem? There’s no room for H8rs in modern headpshrinking.

Paging Mr. Pitt. Mr. Pitt to Accounting, please.

Richey added: “The defendant admitted to police that he’s been using a lot of meth recently, which is the reason for the voices in his head,” reported the Bellingham Herald.

Meth! Is there anything it can’t do?

We dunno about you, but the voices in our head say, “Don’t take meth. Don’t even think about it.” Guess we just got a better batch of voices than Wolf Cub here.

A Bellingham Police spokesperson said: “Officers and firefighters responded to a welfare check at a residence in the 1500 block of McKenzie Avenue, in response to a 911 call. When emergency personnel arrived shortly after 2:00 pm, they located a deceased female. The female was identified as 57-year-old Aurora Buol-Smith.

The mark of the modern American narcissus, the hyphenated name, seems to be slashed across every single story of horror, degeneracy, and depravity these days. It’s OK if you’re the sort of Briton who has great-great-x-20 Uncle Nigel’s suits of armor in the foyer, but here in the States, the first-generation hyphen hunter tends to be damaged goods… even before the more-damaged kids they raised go all werewolf on ’em.

“Sheaen Smith was located and contacted by responding officers in an upstairs bedroom of the residence. Smith made several statements, including one to the effect of ‘I stabbed her.’ Smith identified the deceased female as his mother, and told officers he had called 911.

“Smith was transported to the police department for an interview. Based on information provided by Smith, a knife was located in the residence. Detectives believe the knife they located is the one that was used to stab Buol-Smith.

“Smith made numerous statements to officers and detectives regarding why he stabbed Buol-Smith. This includes a statement that he was a werewolf, and his mother a vampire.

“Detectives and crime scene investigators will continue to work closely with the medical examiner and the prosecutor’s office on this case.”

Bellingham Police also tweeted that “sexual motivation” resulted in Buol-Smith’s murder. However, investigations are still containing as to whether this conclusion arrived due to similar delusional statements from Smith. An autopsy result will determine if Buol-Smith was sexually assaulted before she was killed.

via Man who thought he was a werewolf ‘murdered mother because she was a vampire’.

Jesus, again. We were ready to call him a mofo already, without knowing it may literally apply.

Really, if he were a dog the humane thing would be to put him down at this point.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have a Knuckle Sandwich

Desmond Joseph, 41, was just trying to park his boss’s truck in his boss’s private parking lot, which some construction guys on an unrelated project had blocked with orange cones. So he moved the cones. And then his troubles began…. and ended:

A construction worker confronted Joseph and an argument turned into a single punch to the head, D.C. police said. Knocked unconscious, Joseph was put on life support.

Joseph, who emigrated from St. Lucia and was an avid gardener who helped his neighbors perfect their plots, died the next day at a hospital. His death has been ruled a homicide.

“It’s a horrific incident,” said the man’s wife, Lisa C. Joseph, 48. “It didn’t have to happen.”

That’s a pretty common refrain from sensible, sane, ordinary people. After some throwback, whose every action is at the mercy of the roils and gusts of his id, has committed mayhem.

Police said the construction worker, Paul Kenneth Hagans, 36, who lives in Upper Marlboro, Md., was charged with aggravated assault, filed before Joseph had died. Authorities said on Monday that additional charges are pending a review by the U.S. attorney’s office. Hagans’s attorney, John J. Carney, called the incident “a real sad situation” but declined to comment on specifics of the case.

Well, yeah, it’s a “sad situation,” and if your guy had used his brain housing group for something other than a knob to hang a hard hat on, it wouldn’t exist.

Hagans, who police said had walked away after Joseph fell, surrendered to police hours later and “stated he hit the guy and knows he’s going to jail,” according to the arrest affidavit. He told police that Joseph was “holding a cone and flinched toward him at which time he reacted by punching him,” the affidavit says.

Of three witnesses, exactly zero reported seeing the “flinch toward [Hagans]” that exists in the self-serving amateur pugilist’s version.

He did, however, also report a vivid memory of the effect of his kill shot:

Hagans described to police seeing Joseph’s eyes roll back as he fell backward to the ground. A Metro transit officer who was driving by saw Joseph, stopped to help and then summoned D.C. police when he was told that Joseph had been struck. Homicide detectives were called immediately because of the severity of the injuries.

Of punches, neither a giver nor a taker be. But if you prevent yourself taking a punch by using deadly force, the law may take a dim view of your actions. Best to use situational awareness and beat a retreat at the first sign of Neanderthal resistance. It may be humiliating, but you don’t want to wind up the victim of some idiot’s Knockout Game kill, nor the victim of some prosecutor’s dream of higher office.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Cremation

What’s wrong with cremation? Well, nothing, except that you’re supposed to wait until the guest of honor is dead.

This is India, so don’t expect it to make sense to occidental minds. Expect it to be a confusing and twisted tale. And then it will still surprise you.

Rachna Sisodia, 24, suffered a lung infection and was taken to hospital in northern India’s Uttar Pradesh state.

Doctors there pronounced her dead. (That rather critical line is missing from the lede of the story, which only added to the confusion).

Her husband, Devesh Chaudhury took her to a funeral pyre with some friends and burned her body.

But someone in the crowd thought that she was still alive so she was pulled out of the fire. Her official cause of death was ‘cardiorespiratory arrest and acute respiratory distress syndrome’.

However, her post-mortem examination revealed there was ash in her lungs suggesting that she was alive when she was put onto a funeral pyre the following day by husband Devesh Chaudhary and his friends.

Two doctors said the cause of death was not lung infection but in fact ‘shock caused by being burnt alive’.

Rajesh Pandey, a senior police superintendent, told local media of the doctors’ verdict.

A police spokesman added: ‘This happens when someone is burnt alive. The particles go inside with the breath. If a person is dead, such particles cannot reach the lungs and the windpipe. So, the doctors concluded that the woman was burnt alive on the pyre.’

Of course, in this, they disagree with the other doctors who pronounced her dead.

However, the doctors at Sharda maintain that Rachna did in fact die at their hospital and post-mortem doctor Pankaj Mishra says he cannot be sure that the body he examined was that of Rachna, due to the extent of the burns on it.

How on earth do doctors disagree about something as fundamental as whether Person X is living or dead? Does Indian medical school take place under a freeway overpass, on a rainy afternoon? The Indian doctors we’ve met would put the lie to that, but maybe we’ve seen a skewed sample.

But like we said, it’s India, so there are even more weird accusations flying around:

However, the Rachna’s uncle Kailash Singh accused her husband Devesh and 11 relatives of raping and killing her. He said that she had been reported missing on December 13.Police are taking the accusations seriously but all the men have disappeared, they say.

via Family cremate woman alive when hospital wrongly declares her dead | Metro News.

This one has a strong whiff of “too good to check” to it. But then, it’s Metro News, which is a British outlet keen on making the rest of the lying press look better, so there is that.

Meanwhile, the rest of you home cremators, make sure you have the death certificate in hand before you fill the propane tank.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Dry Spells

For it to be a news story, there has to be a little bit of death where death is unexpected: like children in First World suburbia. Retail death. But for death in Darkest Africa to make a news story, given the value of life in the Dark Continent, it has to be a batch process. Wholesale death.

Which brings us to the latest grim stop on the decades-long Stations of the Cross that is the history of independent Somalia, a history that comprises nothing uplifting —  just wars, civil wars, marginally-organized criminality, and death, death, death. So today’s news is just one fresh company-grade die-off in a nation that inflicts the Battle of the Somme on itself time and time again.

110 people have died from hunger in the past 48 hours in a single region as a severe drought threatens millions of people across the country.

It was the first death toll announced by Somalia’s government since it declared the drought a national disaster on Tuesday. The United Nations estimates that 5 million people in this Horn of Africa nation need aid, amid warnings of a full-blown famine.

Ah, yes. The poor Africans need aid. While this is certainly true, consider the history of passing that aid through the United Nations and other transgovernmental and non-governmental organizations. Seventy years of doing that has built many a bank skyscraper in Geneva and Liège. And the Africans are still pretty much as poor as Stanley or Livingstone ever found ’em.

Prime Minister Hassan Ali Khaire spoke during a meeting with the Somali National Drought Committee. The death toll he announced is from the Bay region in the southwest part of the country alone. Somalia was one of four regions singled out by the U.N. secretary-general last month in a $4.4 billion aid appeal to avert catastrophic hunger and famine, along with northeast Nigeria, South Sudan and Yemen. All are connected by a thread of violent conflict, the U.N. chief said.

$4.4 Billion, of which most will go to provide Good Jobs at Good Wages for UN bureaucrats… in places like New York and Geneva.

The U.N. humanitarian coordinator, Stephen O’Brien, was expected to visit Somalia in the next few days.

How did any humanitarian actions take place before the Event Horizon of humanitarian coordinators?

Bonus question: suggest the lowest probable annual income and net worth for the above-mentioned Stephen O’Brien. Express your answer in multiples of the annual per-capita GDP for Somalia.

Thousands have been streaming into Somalia’s capital, Mogadishu, in search of food aid, overwhelming local and international aid agencies. Over 7,000 internally displaced people checked into one feeding center recently.

“Feeding center.” Jeez, 1984 is here at last. Or maybe it’s Brave New World. 

The drought is the first crisis for Somalia’s newly elected Somali-American leader, President Mohamed Abdullahi Mohamed. Previous droughts and a quarter-century of conflict, including ongoing attacks by extremist group al-Shabab, have left the country fragile. Mohamed has appealed to the international community and Somalia’s diaspora of 2 million people for help.

What kind of help?

Is it just us, or does it sound like Dueling Mohameds here has his hand out for money?

About 363,000 acutely malnourished children in Somalia “need urgent treatment and nutrition support, including 71,000 who are severely malnourished,” the U.S. Agency for International Development’s Famine Early Warning Systems Network has warned.

Because of a lack of clean water in many areas, there is the additional threat of cholera and other diseases, U.N. experts say. Some deaths from cholera already have been reported.

Experts. Where would we be without them?

The government has said the widespread hunger “makes people vulnerable to exploitation, human rights abuses and to criminal and terrorist networks.”

The U.N. humanitarian appeal for 2017 for Somalia is $864 million to provide assistance to 3.9 million people. But the U.N. World Food Program recently requested an additional $26 million plan to respond to the drought.

via Somalia: 110 dead from hunger in past 48 hours in drought | Minnesota Public Radio News.

What percentage of that total $890 million will go to feed those 3.9 million people, and what percentage of it will be stacked up like gold teeth in the safekeeping of the gnomes of Zurich, on the personal accounts of various African politicians and UN/international doo-gooders,  is another question entirely.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Social Media

We knew it’s addictive, but deadly? That’s what Russian rozzers say, blaming a social media game called Blue Whale that apparently runs within a popular Russian facebook-like platform, vKontakte, for at least four suicides by girls aged 14-16.

How you get from a game in a virtual world to a life-ending plunge from a high place or leap in front of a train — the particular check-out mechanisms the girls have have chosen so far.

Police in Russia are investigating whether a spate of suicides among young people has been sparked by a sinister social media game called Blue Whale.

Two schoolgirls, aged 15 and 16, fell to their deaths from a 14-storey block of flats, another, aged 15, fell from a fifth floor flat, while a 14-year-old girl died after being hit by a train.

Detectives are looking into the theory that they took part in tasks in the run-up to their deaths.

Yulia Konstantinova, 15, left a note on social media saying ‘end’ shortly after posting a picture with a blue whale while her friend Veronika Volkova, 16, wrote ‘Sense is lost… End.’ before she took her own life.

It was reported that two teenage boys were detained by police at the scene after allegedly filming the tragic double suicide.

via Blue Whale game on social media ‘causing teenage suicides’ | Metro News.

This sounds crazy, but suicide always sounds crazy, and Russian cops, internal security agents, and psychologists think the craze was initially started by a sick adult geek with a keen understanding of teen psychology — and may be self-sustaining even if he is removed.

So how does a kid get signed up for a suicide applet? It seems like they start with small tasks (like our “confidence targets” in training Gs) and are gradually more isolated and driven to be more committed to the game. The police have a “defector” from the game, and she…

…. explained that had  had joined a ‘game’ …and had been given ‘ tasks’ by the administrator of the group.

She did not obey the commands – but there are fears that others did.

In the Chita case, transport police confirmed that the so-called suicide game ‘Blue Whale’ is seen as a possible ’cause of death’.

A second girl had made plans to kill herself with the dead teenager, but changed her mind at the last moment.

Demands on the gameplayers are gradually increased, in a manner reminiscent of self-destroying quasi-religious cults, like Scientology. But even famously unstable L. Ron Hubbard never went so far as to try to drive all his followers to suicide.

Teenagers are urged to use a knife or razor to make the shape of a whale on their wrist or leg, say Russian reports.

They are also urged to watch horror movies all day, and to wake themselves at 4.20am, steps leading up to demands to take their own lives on the 50th day being in the game.

There was deep concern last year when there were fears that the sinister masterminds could be behind at least 130 suicides across Russia.

That’s probably overstating the problem. Teens are a roiling storm of hormones, and a certain baseline level of teen suicide is probably resistant to any public intervention (not that it would feel any better if it was your kid). The 130-suicides number is probably an all-Russia, all-teen-suicides number.

After the arrest of a supposed ringleader, there was a reduction in cases, but now there is major new fear of vulnerable teenagers being swayed by the barbaric death social media accounts.

Investigative newspaper Novaya Gazeta reported last year: ‘We have counted 130 suicides of children that took place between November 2015 to April 2016.

‘Almost all these children were members of the same internet groups and lived in good, happy families.’

It went on: ‘We know absolutely for sure is that adults are working with children, with the help of knowledge of their habits and passions, using their favourite language and culture,’ reported the newspaper.

‘They know psychology well, they convince girls that they are ‘fat’,  tell boys that they are ‘losers’ in this world. And that there is another world and they will be among the chosen.’

A report on Ren TV said that an internal report by the FSB secret service, once headed by Vladimir Putin,  ‘indicated that the problem of provoking suicides among underage children via Internet is really serious’.

Aside: did Vladimir Vladimirovich head the FSB, or was he just a field-grade officer in the same before taking up politics?

Last year an alleged ringleader named as 21 year old Philipp Budeikin was detained, and he has been charged with organising eight groups between 2013 and 2016 which ‘promote suicide’.

Some 15 teenagers committed suicide, and another five were rescued at the last moment, according to the case against him.

Children are told on such social media that ‘the best things in life start with the letter ‘S’ – semiya (family), Saturday, sex, suicide.’

A song tells them: ‘We have left for the open space, we have nothing left in this world’.

The children are asked: ‘How many dull days like this are you going to drag yourself through?’

A picture of an approaching train has a sign: ‘This world is not for us.’

A photograph of teens on a roof is captioned: ‘We are children of the dead generation.

You know, Vladimir Vladimirovich can probably motivate his cops to find the sick creeps who send this crap to suggestible teens, and then Russia can probably do something suitable with said sick creeps. Lex talionis would suggest using a tall building or even an aircraft to generate a sufficient freefall period for these tools of the Adversary to have an opportunty to repent and get right with the Creator, before they’re ushered into His presence. But we feel confident to leave it in V.V.’s capable hands.

When Guns are Outlawed Only Outlaws will have Hot Tubs (Again)

Sure, it looks innocent, even inviting. But this was Stephen King’s hot tub.

This kid isn’t dead, yet, but certainly everybody in the spa and hot tub industry has heard about cases like this, some of which have been fatal. (It’s not even our first time with a When Guns are Outlawed, Hot Tubs feature).

The grate over the intake is not cosmetic, it’s a vital safety-of-use item, and if you’re going into one of these things it’s incumbent on you to know where the intake is and to keep your, and especially your small children’s, nether reaches away from it.

We all have to die some day, but preferentially, not today, and most importantly, perhaps, not over something silly like this.

Isabella Floyd, 4, was relaxing with her family in a Bulgarian resort when she went into the jacuzzi with her mum Nicola, 28.

She and her mum were sitting close to each other in the tub enjoying the bubbles, but her bottom somehow became stuck in the filter.

Her mum tried to pull her free but Isabella was kept down by the force of the vacuum as she shouted out ‘My tummy, my tummy’.

It was only possible to release her when a lifeguard came to switch off the electrics.

When she was finally able to get out, her bowel was badly damaged.

Surgeons have operated twice and removed part of her intestine, but she has had to be put into an induced coma and is now fighting for life.

via Girl, 4, fighting for life after getting sucked into hot tub mechanism | Metro News.

If you’re a praying man or woman, the survival and recovery of this little girl that none of us know personally seems like a worthwhile thing upon which to expend a prayer.

Don’t read too much into the “induced coma,” as that’s increasingly used in trauma cases and doesn’t necessarily foretell imminent expiry.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have Knives

This charming but hard-of-thinking-lookin’ fellow is Anthony Laine, from Worcestershire, England, and he’s here not for raping a woman — twice– but for what else he did.

He cut her face off.

Anthony Laine, 30, raped the woman twice near the River Severn in Bewdley, Worcestershire last summer.

The woman was left with a ‘floating face’ – a medical term for when the front of the face becomes detached from the skull.

He pleaded guilty to two counts of rape and inflicting GBH with intent at Worcester Crown Court.

She said via a recorded video statement: ‘It’s ruined my life. I come across as a strong person. I’m not really. I’m looking at lots more operations, lots more time in hospital.

‘I’m in constant pain. I can’t eat properly. I have to eat soft food. I can’t chew anything at all. I can’t eat meat or even toast. I can’t open my mouth to yawn.’

She added: ‘I’m still alive, that’s the only thing. I’m fed up with the pain. That’s what gets me down more than anything.’

Prosecutor Timothy Sapwell said she suffered a 4ins cut down the middle of her forehead, a v-shaped cut over her right eye and another over her left eye.

Both eyes were also swollen shut and her eyelids had to be cut open to relieve pressure on her eyes.

A CT scan at hospital revealed serious underlying fractures to her face called ‘Le Fort Fractures’.

One of the fractures ran above her teeth and upper jaw with another running from the bridge of her nose across the floor of the eye socket to the hinge of her jaw.

Mr Sapwell said: ‘The front of the face was completely detached from the skull and smashed in two. It’s described in medical terms as floating face.’

The court heard her injuries required a nine and a half hour operation where bone grafts from other parts of the skull were used to repair her nose.

Metal plates and screws were also put into her eye sockets, her cheek and jawbone during the surgery.

The victim, who has no feeling in her top lip, also said she doesn’t like leaving the house because she feels people are looking at her.

via Rapist ripped woman’s face from her skull during horrific attack | Metro News.

This is how safe it is, where guns are outlawed.

Laine told the cops he didn’t see what the big deal was… apart from the knife stuff, “only hit her about four times.” With what? Le Fort fractures are usually associated with high-energy blunt force trauma and are potentially life-threatening.

So, naturally, the British criminal courts are going to throw a suitable book at him? Alas, no.

If they did, it was something lightweight like a Harlequin romance — he only got 12 years.

Somewhere, a vintage copy of Blackstone’s Commentaries is spinning in library stacks.