Category Archives: Don’t be THAT guy

She looks like a naughty girl, doesn’t she?

Meet Dallas Archer, a Tennessee woman who’s taken Mexican carry to a new, er, place.


A Kingsport woman arrested for driving on a suspended license is now facing more charges after jailers say they discovered a hidden gun.

Kingsport Police say Dallas Archer, pictured above, had a loaded .22-caliber revolver hidden inside her body.

They’re not more specific than, “inside her body,” which makes us curious, but not really all that curious, if you know what we mean, and we think you do. At least it was a .22, but then, that’s probably a function of her youth. When she’s 45, the gun will be, too.

It was found by jailers who were searching her while booking her into the city jail.

It’s never a good idea to hide a firearm inside one of your standard-issue biological orifices. For one thing, the lady warders at the women’s lockup always seem to include a few women who like poking around in other women’s orifices. It’s most unlikely that your hideaway gun will go undiscovered by prurient visual and digital examination.

After checking the gun records, officers discovered the gun had been stolen in 2013.

No idea what kind of “gun records” they have in TN, but we’re kind of thinking it was just a list or database of stolen guns, possibly the ATF’s.

She’s now facing additional charges for possession of stolen property and bringing contraband into the jail.

via Jailers: Woman had stolen loaded gun hidden in body | News – Home.

If she hadn’t been doing the basic Dumb Criminal Thing of driving while suspended, she probably could have continued tooling around Kingsport indefinitely with all kinds of hardware jammed into the folds and recesses of her body. But then, criminal masterminds are the stuff of fiction. Real criminals seem to come in “Dumb”, “Dumber”, and “TSA Potential” degrees.

It’s never just One Thing with Stolen Valor turds

gregory schaffer phony SEALThis New Jersey brownstain was outed as a phony SEAL back in the 2011, but the FBI dismissed the idea of charging or prosecuting him then. Stolen valor, they sniffed, is a victimless crime. Except as we, and everybody else in the community knows, the character deficiencies that lead to some nerdy perv playing Action Guy Dress Up like this, are invariably comorbid with other character flaws and other criminal behavior.

Since Stolen Valor is, pace the FBI, “a victimless crime,” maybe the Bureau should wake up to the fact that it is the veritable lodestone pointing to other crimes, which always have real, human, victims.

In the case of scrawny self-proclaimed “SEAL officer” Gregory Schaffer, the victims were female and underage. In addition to multiple rapes, he also has been indicted for making kiddie porn with some of his victims. Short-Eyes Schaffer told 15- and 16-year-old girls that the employment contracts they’d signed with him obligated them to sexual servitude — and swore them to lifelong secrecy about it. The New York Post, after Monday’s testimony:

Gregory Schaffer, 35, offered the now-18-year-old woman a lingerie shop job in March 2012 and had her sign a flurry of documents.

Schaffer then told the victim that she’d just signed a contract that compelled her to perform a variety of sex acts, prosecutors said at his Brooklyn federal court trial.

“He told me I just signed a document agreeing to do those things with him,” she testified Monday. “I was shocked.”

Schaffer even claimed that he could sue her if she failed to follow the fine print and that she also had unwittingly signed a confidentiality agreement that barred her from discussing the arrangement.

“He said he could sue me for breach of contract and sue my great-grandmother,” she testified, referring to her legal guardian at the time.

Crying and frightened, the woman agreed to have sex with Schaffer. “I was upset,” she recalled of the encounter in a grimy Jersey City office. “I was disgusted.”

The woman testified that she feared for her family and believed that Schaffer could take her to court for not having sex with him.

Prosecutors said his plot developed after he answered her innocent Craigslist ad seeking summer employment in the retail field.

The criminal behavior wasn’t isolated to the shrugged-off Stolen Valor or the sexual peccadilloes, either. Among the facts that came out about Schaffer, when he was finally, belatedly busted:

Agents described Schaffer as a transient with a prison record for theft and several lawsuits against him.

Schaffer’s attorney, Michelle Gelernt, is using the “bitch had it coming, and probably liked it,” defense, claiming that her client’s serial rapes of high-school kids were “consensual,” because “they answered his emails.” That’s part of why the girl was being rational when she believed that the court system might have conspired with Schaffer against her — Gelernt, a court officer, has been glad to do so. The other part, later.

The Post, again, after Tuesday’s testimony:

The prosecutors’ table looked more like a sex toy sample sale Tuesday at the trial of a New Jersey man charged with convincing a Brooklyn teen that she was legally bound to have sex with him.

Brooklyn federal prosecutors said Gregory Schaffer offered the girl, whom was 15 at the time, a nonexistent retail job and then told her that she had unwittingly signed a “sex contract” that compelled her to romp with him.

Scared that he was going to sue her and her family for breach of contract, the underage girl complied with his sick demands in March 2012, prosecutors said.

A swarm of agents raided Schaffer’s Jersey City “office” after the incident and found a trove of sex toys including a penis pump, a sex swing, prosthetic genitalia and lubricant, prosecutors said.

via Filthy toy and video trove revealed in ‘teen sex contract’ trial | New York Post.

And now we get to another reason why it’s reasonable for 15- and 16-year-old rape victims to think the New York court system is likely to make common cause against them, with their rapists:

Judge Allyne Ross barred the jury from viewing handcuffs and restraints that were allegedly found at the office because the items were deemed too inflammatory.

Lord love a duck. That makes perfect sense: can’t show the juror’s the perv’s perv tools, lest they form an opinion he’s a perv or something, whilst he’s on trial for being a perv. That’s the other part of why the girl was rational in fearing the courts were against her: at least this court, and this judge, are.

Fortunately, Schaffer’s SEAL imposture, one of the tools he used to bed these kids, is going to be heading upriver for a while.

Hat tip, Jonn at This Ain’t Hell, who’s been on Schaffer like ugly on an ape for years now.

Never Transit a NY-area Airport. Ever.

Ah yeah, the NYC metro area and especially its trailer-trash cousin, Newark. Where hospitality means leaning on the horn and flipping you the bird — if you’re lucky.

Adam Urbano, 23, of Valparaiso, IN, was not lucky. He was trying to transit to Chicago on his way home, when the TSA mongs alerted to a rifle in his checked luggage. The TSA, the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey Police, and Adam Messing, a TSA-level-IQ reporter for the New York Post (and his “layers and layers of editors”) all misidentified the firearm as (cue horror-movie music) an AK-47, and Urbano was duly thrown in jail.


(The weapon, as you can clearly see, is actually a semi-auto clone of the Czech VZ-58, which shares a caliber and a superficial resemblance with the famous Russian assault rifle).

The incident unfolded at about 6:40 p.m., when Adam Urbano, of Valparaiso, was arrested by Port Authority cops after TSA agents found the weapon during a routine screening of his luggage prior to his boarding a Southwest Airlines flight for Chicago, sources said.

Under Federal law, you can travel with your firearms. Under New York and New Jersey law, you can’t. Good luck appealing to this Justice Department for your rights. Other jurisdictions where they take glee in busting people transiting under their supposedly guaranteed McClure-Volkmer Act rights are Chicago (where Urbano was passing through on his way home, so he could have been jailed at that end, too) and Boston.

A further check revealed the weapon, manufactured by Ohio Ordinance Work, with a folding stock, inside a soft gun case. There were also three magazines with the gun, two containing a maximum of 30 rounds and the third containing 10 more rounds.

What were we just saying about Mr Messing and his layers and layers of editors? To state it in the elegant symbology of the C computer language, Ordinance != Ordinance. It’s a common error. At least by dumb-asses. That makes us suspect Messing just copied something the mouth-breathers of the TSA or the Port Authority Police handed him.

Thou shalt not copy, and if one does copy, though shalt not copy from people dumber than oneself.

Urbano had no paperwork for the rifle and had not declared it to airline officials and claimed he had purchased the gun for “recreational purposes.”

This would probably shock and terrify most in the Greater New York metro area, but in all but a handful of coastal states, nobody expects you to have any “paperwork for the rifle.” Places like New York and New Jersey, where all guns are registered, let alone places like Illinois and Massachusetts where you need a government permit to buy a .22 rifle or a box of shells, are exceptions. (MA seems determined to become the worst of these. They are making the rifle-permit may-issue, and in many towns that will be no-issue. In others it will be “no issue, except to the connected and maybe white people”).

On the other hand, when you travel with a gun it (1) must be in checked luggage, (2) must be unloaded (most airlines would not accept ammo in the mags, although their policies differ), and (3) you must declare it at check-in. Of course, if you do that in Newark, you’re going to jail, because civil rights don’t apply there. But they can do that to the hapless Urbano, who will now spend a long time in New Jersey’s hellhole prisons, because he enabled them by not following the rules.

Of course, it’s one more good reason not to fly.

He was charged with the illegal possession of an assault rifle and prohibited possession of large capacity ammunition magazines and was facing arraignment today.

It’s kind of amazing that they defined 30 as “large capacity.” It’s been the standard capacity rifle magazine in the US since 1969, in Russia since 1947, and in most of the rest of the world since they replaced their FALs in the 1990s.

 His arrest follows similar arrests at JFK and LaGuardia Airports earlier this month.

What did we tell you? The Greater New York Area, where just passing through gets you thrown in jail. But hey, Law Enforcement people there are better than you. But the policy of pursuing tourists and travelers instead of gangbangers seems to be bearing fruit. Yep, they sure have things under control.

via Flier busted at Newark airport with Soviet-style AK-47, ammo | New York Post.

OT: Poor, poor Indra Nooyi

Indra Nooyi hates America, the military, and you. But she sure loves your money.

Indra Nooyi hates America, the military, and you. But she sure loves your money.

Indra Nooyi is the anti-American and anti-military 1%er who’s headed Pepsi since 2006. The stock is up currently due to the same market bubble that has the Dow flirting with 17,000 (because where else can capital go, except to stocks, in the never-ending recession?) But the supposed finance expert has tanked two business fundamentals: return on capital has been halved on her watch, and return on equity dropped by one-third (scroll down to the historical data, and note that the peaks coincide with her appointment). But she’s the sort of celebrity CEO that chases the reporters and cameras, rather than the kind that grows the company. (She has, instead, laid off thousands while banking around $20 million a year). Meanehile, Pepsi isn’t even the #2 soft drink to Coke any more: it’s #3, after Coke and Diet Coke. Diet Pepsi fell to 7th Place. She led a logo redesign that turned into an “own goal,” where over a million was spent to make the logo look more like the Obama “O-Stika” logo she admired; ran suicide-themed ads for a new product, which predictably failed; redesigned its premium-priced Tropicana orange juice to look like a house brand, and rebranded Gatorate as “G” for the “world market,” leading to the evaporation of much of its US market. Asking what was going wrong at Pepsi, CBS concluded: “Everything.” Yet they blamed an underling, Massimo D’Amore, because the Iron Law of Reportage is “it’s never the affirmative-action hire.”

So now there’s a marshmallow-tough interview by some marshmallow of a reporter in the Atlantic, in which Nooyi complains about work-life balance and how, even with her mother, her secretary, and multiple servants assigned to raise her kids for her, the teenagers have the audacity to demand some of their parents’ time.

Let us explain why we do not give to farts in a Force Five blow for Mrs Nooyi, for her imported caste-conscious Indian contempt for the lower orders, and for her kids, who will doubtless be worthless parasites like their mom.

She first came to public attention in 2005, already a senior PepsiCo executive (Chief Financial Officer). Giving a commencement speech to the throngs graduating from Columbia University’s business school (it was held in Madison Square Garden), she disparaged the USA and Americans, suggesting that our very existence “gave the finger” to the rest of the world, and that we ought to be more like the majority of Third World hellholes in the UN. This was a nine-days’ wonder in the blogosphere at the time.

Paul Mirengoff of PowerLine then noted, while “drinking a Diet Pepsi”:

I’m wondering, why should I drink something that tastes this bad after PepsiCo president Indra Nooyi’s speech at Columbia. Americans are dying every day bringing freedom to Iraq and Afghanistan, and killing terrorists who target much of the world to which Nooyi thinks we are giving “the finger.”

Nooyi’s subsequent comments went through the Kubler-Ross stages of deception: Denial, Lying, Misdirection, Claiming to Be Misunderstood, Non-Apologetic Apology, Disparagement of Questioners, and finally, Referring It To A Corporate Flack. The flack in question, some soulless, amoral oxygen thief named Christine Jones, then ran exactly the same playbook, in exactly the same order, under the direction of PepsiCo director of PR, a soulless, amoral oxygen thief named Ellen Palmer, who dishonestly distributed a bowdlerized, edited version of Nooyi’s speech that reversed Nooyi’s anti-American diatribe.

Trying to get Nooyi, let alone those wastes of sperm and egg Jones and Palmer, to answer questions gave some entertainment to Major Eric Egdahl, who was serving in the activity that would grow into JIEDDO at the time.  Egdahl never got a straight answer, because Nooyi (and Jones) hate him but fear the consequences of saying so. The whole thing was covered in a long column at the Weekly Standard, and extensively in many posts by Powerline, although ignored by the New York Times (after all, the speech took place in Madison Square Garden, and most reporters from the paper that disdains having a sports section probably couldn’t find it without help from a Boy Scout, whom they’d lecture about his duty to be gay).

Pepsi is also, by any measure nasty stuff, even if the corporation wasn’t headed by the Spawn of Satan herself. We have used it in the past when naval jelly was not available to strip corrosion off neglected parts, but we don’t drink the stuff and will not have it in Hog Manor.

As far as Indra Nooyi? We’ll see her in hell.

Witness Protection: We don’t think it means what UK thinks it means

In Britain, the definition of “witness protection” is a little different from the way it’s done in the USA, even in fictional TV series like The Sopranos or Lillyhammer. We begin with a former private eye who’s done time for phone hacking, looking at another stay in the nick, says the Beeb:

News of the World hacker Glenn Mulcaire may now face prosecution for obtaining the identities of people under witness protection, Panorama has learned.

OK, so what witnesses did he unprotect, then? What brave snitches that ratted out stone-cold killers? None, actually. In Britain, “Witness Protection” is for the killers, so that the new people they interact with aren’t prejudiced against them.

He had discovered the new identities of four notorious offenders, including one of toddler James Bulger’s killers, by hacking phones, the Met Police said. The newspaper printed several stories about Robert Thompson’s new life.

via BBC News – NoW hacker Glenn Mulcaire ‘breached witness protection’. The press’s focus has been on the corruption of the police, but by any measure the corruption of the press was far worse (the final tally of arrests for phone hacking was 26 coppers and 101 ink-stained wretches, although “final” seems like the wrong word, with Mulcaire liable to rearrest and a second ride through the Old Bailey fun house, and unnamed other journos likely to join him. But let’s dwell a time on the “witnesses” whose privacy has been worth, so far, a £60 million investigation. Robert Thompson and Jon Venables are two soulless monsters who at age ten committed their first killing, two-year-old James Patrick Bulger. But it wasn’t just a murder. They lured the toddler away from his mother, kidnapped him,  and led him away. The trusting boy, a month short of his third birthday, seemed to like one of the killers, Venables; he took his hand, and from time to time, Venables says, he picked him up and carried him. The murderers were caught by a camera as they led the boy away; that picture would ultimately lead to their arrest and conviction. No camera caught what happened next, but the soulless pair had no problem admitting it, when they were finally asked. They began to beat and injure the boy as they led him across town to a remote railyard, where they tortured him. Motive? None evident. Just cruelty let to run free. Here’s what happened to the poor kid: this is what the “witnesses” they’re so anxious to “protect” did:

  1. They had already dropped him on his head and beaten him in the face.
  2. They poured or threw oil-based laquer in his eye.
  3. They kicked and stomped on him.
  4. They threw bricks and stones at him.
  5. They pulled off his shoes, socks, pants and underpants.
  6. They sexually molested him. (The details of this are mercifully unclear).
  7. They shoved batteries up his anus, causing internal injuries.
  8. They then stuffed the batteries in his mouth. All the time they were laughing and egging each other on — by their own statements.
  9. Tiring of torturing the toddler, they then raised up a railway fishplate (the 20+ pound iron plate that sits under the rail on each tie, and holds the spikes in position) and smashed his small skull with it. Repeatedly. He ultimately had 10 skull fractures, and dozens of other injuries. If their previous abuses did not kill him, this did.
  10. They then lay his dead body across the tracks and buried his head under trash and scrap (including the fishplate). They later explained, quite cold-bloodedly and remorselessly, that they did this to make it look like the child was a victim of a train accident.
  11. They then left, completely carefree.
  12. Two days later, Bulger’s body was found. It had been crushed and severed by passing trains. The pathologists determined that all the train injuries were postmortem, but he couldn;t determine which of the many other injuries was fatal to poor Bulger.

The only regret one of these monsters, Venables, ever expressed was regret that he got caught, and Thompson, who took the lead in these appalling crimes, has never expressed even that much. But they walk free today (despite, in the case of Venables, subsequent felonies).

A woman who saw the grainy security footage was able to ID one of the killers, and knew that he and the other had played hooky that day. After the boys were arrested , a mountain of physical evidence condemned them. One left an identifiable shoeprint on Bulger’s face; their shoes still were bloody, with Bulger’s blood. They’d gotten the paint the put in his eye on themselves and their clothes. And they denied nothing.

At the trial, it came out that Bulger was the second toddler they’d tried to kidnap and murder that day, but in the first case they were stopped by an alert mother.

By any measure, these two human-shaped creatures are a complete waste of protoplasm, and in a better world they would have been recycled already. Even the British judge recognized that he was dealing with two lost souls of “unparalleled evil and barbarity… cunning and very wicked.” 

Due to quirks in Britain’s laws, and the extreme laxity of British justice, they could not be imprisoned for long. The Home Secretary tried to have them imprisoned for fifteen years (!) but British liberals and lawyers protested with anguish the “cruelty” of the sentence. Prime Minister John Major countered that it would be good to “condemn a little more, and understand a little less.” But he didn’t do anything concrete about it (and would soon be swept away by an election of his own).

While imprisoned, the murderers received a cash allowance, outings to recreational areas, education to A-Levels, and new identities, as part of the ill-named “witness protection” program, which in Britain is primarily used to give cover to murderers, rapists, child molesters, and other monsters. Now, many of the 8,500 participants in US WitSec are not nice people, but they’re not in the program because they were murderers; they’re in the program because they have given up worse murderers or other criminals. That is a distinction that our British cousins appear to have lost sight of, in pursuit of some daft idea that crime should be as free as possible of consequences. Some unknown number of the 3,000 people in the British equivalent program are actually criminals who made no contribution to criminal justice, except as the men of the hour.

Returning to our heroes’ conduct whilst in nick, Venables regularly had sex with a woman who worked in his prison; when it was discovered, she was transferred and the incident covered up. Nothing was allowed to interfere with HM Prison Service’s prime goal, the comfort and convenience of these monsters. A psychiatrist’s report identifying Thompson as a psychopath (for one thing, he has never shown remorse, or any affect at all, relative to the Bulger murder) was dismissed by the authorities, who were determined to demonstrate rehab success with these two unlikely candidates.

Even the weak-as-water 15-year sentence didn’t stand. The European Court of Human Rights ruled that the murderers had been ill done by and must be released sooner. The same Court dismissed the entreaties of Bulger’s parents as unworthy of the notice of such distinguished jurists as themselves; by extension, ruling that Bulger, unlike Thompson and Venables, had no “human right” to life. Lawyers!

After they were released from prison in 2001, the new false identities of the two murderers have been one of Britain’s most expensively and thoroughly guarded state secrets. That hasn’t prevented them from returning to crime; character always runs true.

Venables, in particular, remains a threat to children and the public. He was arrested in 2008 for affray (assault), and later for cocaine possession. He even was returned to prison briefly in 2010 after being caught possessing and distributing explicit child porn — including images of two-year-olds being raped by adults. (You may recall, if you had the stomach to read the list above, that his original offense was the molestation and rape of a two-year old. Character runs true).

In the USA, even a first offense of child porn of that nature would get a long sentence, but in Britain, it’s only good for two years. Venables was released in 2013, after being given a second new identity, when the first one wound up posted on a website that tracks pedophiles. Under his “clean” new identity, he is not required to register as a pedophile, although he remains on supervised release; Britain places a higher value on the privacy of Venables than the safety of any children this lifelong pervert may encounter.

But the villain, say the British authorities? It’s not Venables, or Thompson, but Mulcaire: the guy who would identify these ticking time bombs for the defenseless public. Several public-spirited Britons who have tried to “out” the new identities of these perverts and murderers have been dragged into the criminal courts handled considerably more roughly than the monsters themselves.

When your system of laws elevates the comfort of Venables and Thompson above the life of poor, doomed Bulger, it has long ceased to be a system of justice. 

Jerry Miculek on Open Carry — and Weaponsman, too: less politely.

Champion shooter, pro competitor, instructor and all around good guy Jerry Miculek has his own take on the bizarre phenomenon of attention-whoring “open carry activists” who go ditty-bopping into various unsuspecting businesses with TAPCO’d out ARs and SKSes carried at the ready. He gets the editorial comment out of the way — gently, and with humor — with his appearance in the first few minutes of the video, and then he spends the rest of it discussing when carrying what is appropriate. His advice is thoughtful, practical, polite to the point of courtliness. And certain to be ignored by certain perseverating camera hounds in Texas.

Do make time to Watch The Whole Thing™ because it’s nothing but solid advice from a guy who stone-cold knows shooting and knows how to prepare for self-defense. And his gentle gibe at some of the guys who disengaged brain before engaging in open carry is frontloaded and over fairly quickly, while the whole video is a pretty good cross-check on your own carry plans and preparedness.

Now, Our Two Cents’ Worth

We do not get the fascination with rifle open carry. (And yes, we know that that’s their brain-dead way to protest the absence of handgun open carry in the Lone Star State). And we do not get the calculus where, if a bunch of weird-looking bozos brandishing guns are seen as threatening by a lot of not-weird-at-all people, the way to resolve that problem is to make the sight bands of bullet-headed bullet-launcher-bedecked bozos drearily commonplace.

We’ll tell you right now: ain’t gonna happen. What these guys have already done is torpedo Open Handgun Carry in Texas. On what they’re trying to do, they’re not only not helping, but their efforts obstruct and hinder the people actually working on the problem. Who could probably use plenty of help, but not this kind.

The activists’ idea of Tactical is more Tacticold, too. What’s next, a Mosin-Nagant in a plastic “sniper kiddie” chassis, with a Walmart Special scope?  If you want cool optics, nifty accessories, and to walk around with your rifle at the ready, the recruiter’s number is in the phone book, and he or she will get you together with a rifle that is not a pathetic laughingstock. For the sort of sedentary geeks we’ve seen representing Open Carry Texas in social media, there may be some problems with such hurdles as height & weight standards and drug testing. Think of it as an opportunity to excel.

This is particularly sad because one of the heads, if not the head, of OCT is a soldier, who ought to know better. But clearly doesn’t. Because his troopies keep doing dumb stuff.

Anyway, Jerry says it all with more tact and style. But they’ll ignore him just as much as they ignore our ruder attempts to transmit the message.

Negative contact with intelligent life in the OC activist community. Weaponsman, out.

Another Roundup of Unbelievable VA stuff

Bryan Preston at PJ Media notes that,  “The Veterans Administration’s scandal … is discrediting the very idea that our government can keep any promise or do anything useful at all.” So what does he find the VA doing?

Tweeting about Global Warming. This is what happens when you have 1,000 Brandon Friedman type political hack spokespeople earning well over $100k each, and no adult leadership.

Screenshot 2014-06-18 19.22.41


What moron decided that was the VA’s priority? Could be any of them, really.

It didn’t take long for someone to make the perfect reply:

Screenshot 2014-06-18 19.25.09

LLAD, as we say around here.

Now that the VA is going to metastasize into managing the oceans, expect deserts.

Remember how we’ve repeatedly mentioned how the VA budget has soared in recent years, but the money hasn’t gone to vets’ health care? Well, one of the places it’s gone is crony-capitalist green energy boondoggles. For Shinseki and his senior managers, “turning green” was a higher priority than treating vets. They blew at least $20 million on solar panels at Phoenix, the home of the secret waiting list on which at least 40 neglected vets died. They blew $10 million on solar panels in Amarillo, Texas, while doing nothing to address the 85-day wait for a primary care appointment at the busy facility. They even put wind turbines in National Cemeteries.

Shinseki himself appeared in Bourne, Massachusetts at one such turbine unveiling. He said this: “Nationally, VA continues to expand its investment in renewable sources of energy to promote our Nation’s energy independence, save taxpayer dollars, and improve care for our Veterans and their families.” Did you follow his Underpants Gnome reasoning? We did. It adds up like this:

  1. Buy solar and wind gimmicks from “connected” firms
  2. Make this the boss’s focus, not health care.
  3. ???
  4. Care for our veterans and their families magically improves!

Here’s another case of the VA wasting millions on a wind turbine, in St. Cloud, MN. This would be money wasted even if the damn thing worked, but this one makes the math extremely simple: it doesn’t work. The story quotes at least two of the VA’s bottomless font of overpaid, underperforming flacks, Barry Venable and Josephine Schuda (note, there are two people who do not help injured or ill vets in any way. Why do they still have jobs?). The VA’s goal “to increase its renewable energy consumption to 15 percent of annual usage by 2013″ was an important goal, as it was one that got what we call in the service command emphasis. Taking care of the wounded and ill didn’t get that emphasis. Q.E.D.

How About a Second Opinion?

OK, If you read this blog, you know that we have a pretty low opinion of the VA. So how about a second opinion? Here’s after, Hollywood military advisor, and, of course, combat veteran Dale Dye’s opinion:

So here’s how you fix the problems with the VA health care system. Fire everyone responsible for administering it. There it is—and bring me the next case which I will solve with equally level-headed aplomb.

Don’t hold back, Dale. Let ‘em know what you’re really thinking. Actually, after that glib (and funny, but serious) gambit the retired Marine Captain offers a similarly outrageous, but necessary, Step Two and a conclusive “Step Three, the fix.” His prescriptions have about the-square-root-of-zero-percent probability of being enacted, and that’s a crying shame, because they would work, and you know the deckchair shuffle they have the usual Beltway bozos building won’t work. Read The Whole Thing™, he calls it “Veterans Mis-Administration.” The guy not only singlehandedly unscrewed Hollywood, he’s dead right on this subject.

How About a Third Opinion?

Why not? Well, let’s see what David French at National Review Online has to say. Surely he is not as keen to fire-’em-all as Dale Dye.

[T]he VA that Sloan Gibson fiercely defends is the same VA that not only makes headlines with its systematic corruption and deception — corruption that costs lives — but also can’t even handle small things like answering press inquires with their 54 full-time public-affairs employees or (to take one example from personal knowledge) firing an employee caught snorting cocaine in the parking lot.

No one is saying that all 350,000 employees are bad. But thousands are, and their continued employment and — even worse — continued protection from the top-down of a dysfunctional bureaucracy harms the government, harms the employees that work with them each day, and — most important – harms the American people they’re supposed to serve.

Oh, snap. He is.

He’s commenting on the promise by Acting Secretary Sloan Gibson to VA workers in Fayetteville, NC, that no one will be fired, lose his bonus, or even face a reprimand, utterly regardless of job performance. Gibson:

This idea that ‘let’s fire everybody, let’s pull everybody’s bonus away’ — that’s a bunch of crap. I’m not going to see people sit there and say that we got 350,000 people that aren’t worth a crap.

You know what’s “a bunch of crap?” The performance of those VA payroll patriots, most definitely including Sloan Gibson, a careerlong apparatchik whose response to his agency’s failures is to blame the messengers (like the whistleblowers who have been systematically attacked by his “350,000 people that aren’t worth a crap.”

When guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guy wires

Amanda Ezra selfie, while she still had a head. Dead of easy access to handguns and drunk driving, but mostly drunk driving.

Amanda Ezra selfie, while she still had a head. Dead of easy access to handguns and drunk driving, but mostly drunk driving.

For all the sturm und drang over the hazards of having a gun around your family, the evidence of daily life never ceases to prove the real hazard is having drunk, stupid, or reckless people around your family. And in this case Amanda Ezra lost her head (literally) to a guy wire, because Kyle Papa was drunk, stupid and reckless.

Investigators soon learned that Ezra, Early, Niles, Bowers and Papa had been at a party when they left in the minivan owned by Ezra.

Niles was in the front passenger seat with Ezra on his lap, while Papa was driving.

Police say the five left the party and headed down Chestnut when Papa realized he had turned the wrong way when he reached the cul-de-sac.

Papa drove quickly around the cul-de-sac, according to court documents, and over shot the curve, driving into the grass.

At the time, Ezra was leaning her head out the window to vomit, according to investigators. When Papa drove the vehicle in the grass, he drove between a utility pole and guide wire.

Ezra struck the guide wire, which caused her head to jerk back and also strike the side of the van.

via Man charged in death of Mishawaka woman after freak accident in Osceola | Local – Home.

Kyle T. Papa mugshot. Stupid is as Kyle does, apparently.

Kyle T. Papa mugshot. Stupid is as Kyle does, apparently.

“Stupid is as stupid does.” Nothing you can fix with legislation, however well-crafted or positively intended.

Of course, the ol’ Judgment Juice™ was a contributing factor in Kyle Papa’s decision to drive like a bozo, and Amanda Ezra’s decision to puke out a window, to the permanent detriment of her head-neck interface.

Giving another drunk the keys to your car is not “defensive driving.” It’s more like begging for doom. Stupid is… the thing that inevitably lights the fuze of its own undoing.

Assclown of the Ides: phony Ranger Bob Bateman

Gun-ban extremist and self-aggrandizing Army desk jockey Bob Bateman is still popular with his press enablers, but in his latest screed he claims to be “a US Army Airborne Infantry Ranger.”

I am coming home. I need to be there and be part of the solution. Moms Demand Action is getting some traction, but they can use the lean-in of a few U.S. Army Airborne Infantry Rangers

via That’s It. I Am Coming Home. – Esquire.

What set off Bateman’s latest tantrum is the shooting of two Las Vegas police officers, Alyn Beck and Igor Soldo, by a couple of nut jobs. Bateman represents the guy and his wife as “typical Tea Partiers” but it turns out that the man of the couple, Jerad Miller, was a career criminal, a convicted felon with a convictions for property, violent and drug crimes dating back to 2000 and continuing essentially nonstop from then on.

Jerad Miller apparently murdered the two cops so that he and his wife, Amanda, could take their guns. Within minutes, he was confronted by Joseph Wilcox, a legal concealed carrier. Unfortunately Wilcox was unaware Amanda was behind him, and she shot him in the head, killing him.

Bateman by his own admission hasn’t been an infantry officer for decades. Like Vietnam phony Joseph Ellis, he found himself a niche teaching at West Point. After that, he moved on to a desk job, and does not appear ever to have returned to troop duty, despite posing for “war tourist” pictures downrange.

He does not have a CIB, fact. He has not served his country as an infantryman in combat, fact. Although these facts are all contrary to the impression this phony tries to give.

And he was never a member of a Ranger Battalion or the Ranger Regiment. Fact. Bateman has a Ranger Tab, a routine ticket-punch for combat arms officers, and went to jump school on the same basis. He does not appear to have been assigned to an airborne unit — ever.

This is a Ranger Tab. Just about everybody gets this, if they’re a combat arms officer or Infantry or SOF NCO. Tens of thousands, maybe hundreds of them, have been awarded. True, not everyone gets it, but most who try do. It’s a personal award that is worn on the left shoulder above the unit patch and below any higher precedence “tabs”. You get it by not quitting at a two month school that uses patrolling as a vehicle to teach low-level (squad and platoon) leadership. Bateman has this, and the five-jump-chump “novice” parachute badge. Fact.



This is a Ranger Scroll. This is only worn on the left shoulder whilst one is in a Ranger Unit (in this case, the 3rd Battalion; there are scrolls for the battalions, for the Regiment, and for the Ranger training brigade). It’s only worn on the right shoulder if one sees combat with that unit.



Bob Bateman is not entitled to wear a Ranger Scroll on either shoulder, and never has been. Fact. Yet he represents himself as a member of this unit — an Airborne Ranger. Fact.

This Ain’t Hell calls him, and this made us laugh, “The least infantry man in the whole world.” Well, that’s hyperbole, not fact: we’ll grant that he’s more infantry than Bradley Manning, but only just.

Ultimate fact: Bob Bateman is a phony, stealing the valor of better men than himself to try to enlist them in his extremist jihad on the Constitution.

Ironically, Bateman’s childish gun policy prescriptions would not have disarmed Miller, who was already supposed to be disarmed by current law, but they would have disarmed Robert Wilcox.

If you want to make a more positive impact on the world than phony Ranger Bob Bateman, Wilcox’s family is having a hard time paying his funeral expenses. The Las Vegas Review-Journal article at that link has accounts and addresses where those of you who are of better character than the Millers, or Bateman, can donate. There is also a GoFundMe site, 100% of which, minus GoFundMe fees, is pledged to the Wilcox family.

(Assclown of the Ides is an occasional feature that appears on the 15th of the month, or if the 15th falls on a Sunday, early the next week. The winner is invariably a person who has made false claims of service, or who has misrepresented his service as something other that what it really was).

TSA Hides Misconduct Behind Bogus Classifications

tsa-security-theaterAnd it’s all, they admit, “Security Theater.”

Confidential, Secret, Top Secret… and SSI. SS-whaat? You’ve just stumbled across a bogus security classification not created by any law, and used by the TSA mostly to hide the agency’s endemic employee and management misconduct. Per a PJ Media report:

According to the new report, the Federal Aviation Administration in 1974 created a category for sensitive but unclassified information popularly known as “Sensitive Security Information” and issued regulations prohibiting the disclosure of information designated as such as detrimental to transportation security. Under the regulation, documents designated as SSI were exempted from release under the Freedom of Information Act.

In wake of the bombing of a commercial airliner that crashed in Lockerbie, Scotland, in 1988, the FAA broadened the regulation to include, among other things, any information the FAA administrator determined could reveal systemic vulnerabilities within the aviation system. It was later expanded further to limit access to protected information to those persons who have a “need-to-know.”

A committee investigation revealed “possible misuse of the SSI designation by TSA,” according to the report. “Witnesses detailed instances in which TSA barred the release of SSI documents against the advice of TSA’s SSI Office. TSA also released SSI documents against the advice of career staff in the SSI office.”

The probe found that many of the problems related to the SSI designation process emerge from the structure of the regulation itself. The final authority on SSI designation rests with the TSA administrator, who is required to provide documentation supporting the SSI designation. But the committee found evidence of designations made without the administrator offering the written documentation supporting the action.

via PJ Media » TSA ‘Abusively and Arbitrarily’ Using Security Designation to Hide Information.

The report referenced in the article is found at this page or directly linked here (.pdf). The Committee says:

Problems with TSA’s application of the SSI designation date back to 2004, including inconsistent application of the designation.

· TSA improperly designated certain information as SSI in order to avoid its public release.

· TSA has repeatedly released information to the public against the advice of the SSI Office and without having produced suitable documentation to explain the decision.

· The structure and position of the SSI Office within TSA has contributed…. One official [called it] a “throwaway office.”

One of the most interesting things (to us) in the longer document was the admission by SSI division chief Andrew Colsky that TSA’s focus is not on security, but, wait for it:

TSA is an organization, sadly, that focuses—you know, the term ‘security theater’ has been used, and unfortunately it’s true. Let’s do whatever we need to do to change the public perception. Let’s not worry about the real issues behind the scenes. And that’s all it was. If we needed—if they felt they needed to do something to get it in the press to change the public perception, that was more important than the security concerns involved. Period.

Security Theater. Admitted by one of the chiefs of the bums and losers working there.

Remember, no one good, decent, honest, moral, intelligent or competent has ever been employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever.