Category Archives: Don’t be THAT guy

Damon Linker, No Deep Thinker

Damon Linker isn’t particularly special today, he’s just an illustration of an immutable law: the more time you spend in the Acela Corridor, the more you see the Outside World through a glass, darkly. This makes most Washington and New York pundits entertaining to read on the subject of war: they can always be counted on to reverse cause and effect, creating what the late Michael Crichton called “‘Wet streets cause rain’ stories”; and they often miss very large beams that are clouded by the motes of partisanship and self-regard that multiply in their eyes, like some sort of virus, lofted in the foul air of their coastal enclaves.

See if you can guess what very large beam is missing from this emphatic statement by Linker (the elisions are for brevity and do not alter his argument, as you can see at the link):

Both … nominees, [and] journalists …avoid talking about the fact that the United States is waging war in at least five countries simultaneously: Iraq, Syria, Yemen, Libya, and Somalia.

Anything missing there? We have a hint, and we still have ineradicable 15-year-old dust from the place on some of our gear: Afghanistan. The word does not exist in his essay. And that’s only one. Despite the current tensions the gormless incumbents of both Presidencies have produced, US Forces have been working intimately with Filipino forces in tamping down the Abu Sayyaf insurgency there, a process that occasionally goes to Bulletsville and more occasionally racks up a US casualty, who used to be, at least, counted as an OEF casualty alongside his Afghan brothers.

So it’s seven wars. Not counting the ones we’re not counting, and believe me, they’re there: Damon Linker doesn’t know about them because the Times and the Post don’t know about them, because most of their international bureaux are closed or are staffed by host nation stringers with their own agendas. And because one of the markers of the speciation of Homo acelaicus is his distance from and revulsion by Homo combativus. 

It’s a safe bet that nobody in the Linker bloodline has suited up for combat in the 45 years since Nixon ended the draft (or in the years before that, where an array of deferments spawned for the convenience of the children of Homo acelaicus kept them out of harm’s way). The whole point of having an aristocracy is hereditary rule, dissociated from standards or merit, for the benefit of the aristocrats. 

Linker is critical of the press in his article, but only because they’re not dumbing things down enough for the real retards, the American people. You see, wars are complicated, and journalists, well:

…journalists have no faith … in the American people to process and evaluate that information in a responsible way.

Well, when the public doesn’t trust the press, and when Damon Freakin’ Linker is the guy who’s going to heal this rift, maybe he’s got the arrow of causation characteristically ass-backwards. Who is it that mistrusts whom, here?

…the press actively contributes to making our politics stupider. Instead of enlightening members of the general public, it entertains them.

Of course, his idea of “enlightening” involves socializing them to Acela Corridor values, so he’s doomed to failure outside of his coastal Echoplex. And then he whines that, this election year:

…the media has come in for unprecedented hostility and abuse….

Perhaps it deserves it? When a guy pontificating about all the wars we’re in elides the fact that his boy and his girl are responsible for many of the new theaters of war in which this one conflict is being conducted, by abandoning Iraq and Afghanistan initially, and then fomenting new wars in Libya, Syria, and even Egypt? When a guy pontificating about the wars forgets about Afghanistan?

Almost everyone I know has been to Afghanistan. To fight. Only to return to the dripping contempt of the Damon Linkers of the world, the sunken, shriveled,  fans in the press box, to whom everything that is good and holy emanates from their beloved political sports-teams.

We’re not ready to lynch reporters here, not even Damon Linker, but we would vote “not guilty” if put on the jury of someone who did.

Poly-Ticks: Another Sports Figure Dumps on Military, Country


This cartoon’s from an entertaining 2013 column at — home of Michael Vick inter alia.

Some of the players of the National Football League, when they’re not getting paid vast sums for entertaining people with a ball game, have been letting their maturity show in a variety of protests against the United States, Police, etc. This is kind of unwise for a group of people of whom about a million hits come up for the search phrase, “NFL player arrested,” the latest of whom, on a gun charge, was busted yesterday on 2 or 3 October. (But hey, cut that Philadelphia Eagle some slack. This one wasn’t for a violent crime, like his last arrest three months ago).  Indeed, the NFL is such a hive of scum and villainy that there are at least, count ’em, one, twothree webpages that do nothing but track NFL busts for the public. The NFL even has a guy, a fixer, whose whole function is to spring arrested NFL thugs before they get into the news. (We recall the New York Times article, but can’t find it). Wait, they have two of ’em.


But, hey, some backup quarterback for some also-ran team wants to make his, and the league’s, loathing for the country and the police into a news story. Maybe he wants a job on ESPN after his team releases him. It’s a free country.

Meanwhile, the NBA, which takes a close second to the NFL for arrested thug players, wants its own protest.

Inmate rec time.Enter a rookie at the New York Knicks, a team which has conducted pre-season training at the facilities of the US Military Academy at West Point. This leads to a dinner invitation that usually becomes a mutual admiration society between the cadets and the ball-players. But that was far too militaristic for this round-ball greenhorn:

The Knicks, who are training at West Point in preparation for the upcoming season, were invited to a team dinner with a retired Colonel and with West Point Cadets. [Joakim] Noah’s rationale for not participating in the team event is best explained by Noah himself, “It’s hard for me a little bit — I have a lot of respect for the kids here fighting — but it’s hard for me to understand why we go to war and why kids have to kill kids all around the world. I have mixed feelings about being here. I’m very proud of this country. I love America. I don’t understand kids killing kids around the world.”

Gee. A stupid basketball player. Like that never happened before.

On the publicity his skipping the team dinner generated he stated, “It’s not my way of saying anything — I was not comfortable.” To Noah’s discredit he either doesn’t understand or chooses not to accept basic facts about life on planet Earth.

That’s from a pretty devastating essay by John Calvin (hmmm. Not the John Calvin, obviously. A pseudonym?) at the American Spectator. Calvin calls Noah infantile, a word that probably applies to his protest role-model, second- or third-string San Francisco football quarterback Colin Kaepernick, as well. Calvin:

Noah’s mentality is …. If only we didn’t have a military the world would be nice to us and we wouldn’t need a military. If we banned guns bad guys wouldn’t have them. If we raise the minimum wage dramatically it won’t impact employment. If we redistribute wealth it won’t dampen creativity, innovation, or hard work. If we let in all the Syrian refugees, they will all be so grateful none of them will become terrorists or insist on Sharia law.

Someone else recently called it ,”Lennonism.” (He may have been inspired by this guy’s use of the term back in March). It fits. You can almost hear this ball-tossing tosser warbling “Imagine all the peo-ple… sharing all the world, yoo-hoo.”

Good luck with that, kid.

To be a modern liberal is to be perpetually immature, which in itself is an annoying enough personality trait, but liberals are usually not content to just be immature, often pairing this with a certain condescending smugness, totally oblivious that their deep thoughts and well held philosophies are sophomoric and stupid when considered rationally.

We’re not huge fans of Academy graduates, having found that they’re either very good or very not good — none of them, thank a merciful God, is mediocre. But the meanest of them — and yeah, we have a specific individual in mind, a moral and physical coward — the very least of them has made a commitment over and above anything likely to come from some jerk who is celebrated for his mastery of a ball. Calvin gets that:

Every year about 15,000 young men and women apply to West Point. These applicants have many options to choose from, but unlike Joakim Noah they have thought seriously about the world we live in and have decided to dedicate a portion of it, at least, to serving our country. Of these 15,000 applicants, only 1,000 or so will be accepted to join that long grey line. Upon getting commissioned as officers, the West Point graduates will take an oath in which they pledge to support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic. A far cry from dedicating themselves to running around the world killing kids, as Joakim Noah believes.

Now, Joakim Noah is not going to make us boycott the NBA. We were already not watching the second most boring game on television (behind tennis, and ahead of golf and soccer). That what passes for the intellectual side of the NBA is so thoroughly shallow and empty is hardly a surprise.

Who’s got Joakim Noah and the Knicks in the Fantasy NBA Arrest League for this season? In that sport, we could actually play NBA teams against NFL teams. And the scoring would be more interesting!


While nobody’s boycotting the NBA yet, are they boycotting the NFL? Not us. We were already not-watching! But the numbers suggest that 10-20% of last year’s NFL watchers are sitting this year out, and up to a third of NFL watchers told Rasmussen that the league’s anti-American and anti-police ethos is their reason. (Details here; follow the links if this interests you. He also blames Thursday games for fan — and player — discontent).


How To Get Prison in California? Kill Cats.

robert-farmer-cat-killerIf only he’d killed people, he’d have all the Golden State with him in sympathy. But he committed a real crime — cruelty to animals.

A 25-year-old South Bay man faces up to 16 years in prison after pleading guilty Tuesday to  torturing and/or killing more than 20 cats he abducted from a quiet residential San Jose neighborhood.

Robert Farmer took the cats off the streets of the Cambrian Park neighborhood during a two-month period last fall, injuring some and killing up to 16. Only four bodies were found.

He pleaded guilty to 21 charges of animal cruelty. His sentencing is not set yet.

“As this sad case comes to a close, our thoughts are with the families who lost their beloved pets,” prosecutor Alexandra Ellis said in a written statement. “We intend to hold Mr. Farmer accountable for his perverse and violent acts.”

Farmer was arrested on October 8, 2015, as he slept in his car. San Jose police found an unidentified orange tabby dead in the car, along with some cat collars.

His crime was actually worse than that. The orange tabby in his car wasn’t just dead.

An orange female tabby cat found dead of blunt force trauma in 24-year-old transient Robert Farmer’s car during his Oct. 8 arrest also had dilated genitals, according to a necropsy report from the San Jose Animal Care and Services division.

A search of Farmer’s car turned up a tub of petroleum jelly along with two cat collars, according to a San Jose Police Department report.

Eeeewwww, does that mean what it sounds like it means?

‘Fraid so:

Myriam Martinez, who owned Thumper, one of the cats Farmer is suspected of killing, shared the necropsy report with this newspaper; it states the orange tabby had vulva and rectal openings of more than one centimeter each. Martinez also shared crime laboratory documents that report a match between DNA found under the claw clippings of the orange tabby and Farmer.

Cat killer and diddler. That’s one siiiick puppy. Most of the press stories, like the top one, say he “tortured and killed” the animals. Few of the stories reveal that he buggered them. (Strange, but the graphic story and the bowdlerized story used here both come from the same newspaper).

“I can’t describe how I feel for what he did to our pets,” Martinez said. “The more we read court documents, the uglier it gets.”

Mrs Martinez, you’ve got that right.

Now, we’re not suggesting that Farmer, who we’ve already stipulated is one sick puppy, ought to be running around off a leash, or out of a cage. Indeed, in a just world, he wouldn’t be getting out in 2032. (Really, much earlier, because CA paroles everyone except Manson). We just wish they’d keep people locked up for that kind of cruelty to humans.

There was a time in the not-too-distant past when no one thought it was cruel or unusual to throw away the key to this guy’s cell, or strap him into Old Sparky, or hang him from a tree. In those days we had a healthy society that thought what he did was cruel and unusual, when right now we’re about one Supreme Court decision away from having to accept and celebrate his kittysexuality. As we said before, eeeewwww.

The Greatest Blue Falcon Ever

File photo (1989) of an F-14A live-firing an AIM-9. Just not at an American jet.

File photo (1989) of an F-14A live-firing an AIM-9. Just not at an American jet.

Here’s a story of a guy who’s probably the ultimate Blue Falcon — of all nations, services, and epochs. Yes, he’s that bad. First, the backstory: Timothy W. Dorsey is probably the worst example ever of how an Admiral’s son can rise in rank in the Navy despite, shall we say, limited competence.

Dorsey’s father, James Dorsey, was an aviator who rose to three-star rank (Vice Admiral) in Pentagon billets after his shipboard days ended. So Timothy’s career skids were greased, and in the 1980s, he skated through training and into the cockpit of an F-14, then the Navy’s premier fighter plane. Career-wise, he blew past aviators with better skill and judgment.

At least, until 22 Sep 87. As an investigating board put it, in the words of board chairman VADM Kendall E. Moranville:

The September 22, 1987, destruction of USAF RF-4C was not the result of an accident, but the consequence of a deliberate act. His subsequent reaction [to the radio command] demonstrated an absolute disregard of the known facts and circumstances.

He failed to utilize the decision-making process taught in replacement training and reacted in a purely mechanical manner. The performance of Lieutenant Timothy W. Dorsey on September 22, 1987, raises substantial doubt as to his capacity for good, sound judgment.

We necessarily rely on the self-discipline and judgment of pilots to prevent such incidents; we have no other choice. Nothing, in my opinion, can mitigate Lieutenant Dorsey’s basic error in judgment.

Yes, Dorsey, carrying out what was supposed to be a guns-cold practice intercept of a friendly reconnaissance jet, armed, locked, and fired an AIM-9 Sidewinder entirely on his own volition. The two pilots in the Air Force jet ejected and survived with minor injuries. Then, he lied about it, displaying a shoulders-wide streak of moral cowardice in his character. A former squadron mate:

I would never have guessed he’d ever make it to commander, much less admiral. In fact, I thought his career was over back when the shoot-down happened. He refused to accept any blame for the shoot-down and swore he was just following ROE even though he knew it was a friendly. I mean, the guy did it on purpose.

For most people that board’s dry understatement, “substantial doubt as to his capacity for good, sound judgment,” would have, shall we say, nailed the three wire on their Naval career.

But most people can’t rely on Admiral Daddy Dorsey (at the time of Timothy’s RF-4 kill a RADM) to run interference. Dorsey Junior couldn’t fly — they clipped his wings after that staggering display of poor skill and character, forbidding him from ever flying a Naval aircraft again, although they still allowed him to wear the wings on his uniform — but he continued onward and upward in the Naval Reserve. Fast forward to 2012 (we’ve changed the order of some of the quoted paragraphs):

Defense Secretary Leon E. Panetta this month announced to the Senate several nominations for promotion to admiral.

On the list is Navy Reserve Capt. Timothy W. Dorsey, … who, while assigned to the aircraft carrier USS Saratoga, committed what the report said was an “illogical act.”


Dorsey intentionally fired his fighter jet’s missile at an Air Force reconnaissance plane, nearly killing its two aviators and destroying the aircraft during a training exercise…

His promotion to admiral has some in the aviation community shaking their heads, especially because minor discretions by flight officers over the past decades have resulted in reprimands and the ends of careers.

Compare Dorsey’s career trajectory — “Mess up and move up” — with what happened to anyone who attended Tailhook in the wrong year. In the end, he didn’t get his Admiral’s Star, but it took an Act of Congress (albeit without the capital A) to stop the promotion.

One wonders what Capt. Michael W. Ross and First Lt. Randy H. Spouse think about Dorsey. Who are they?

“The airplane just starts shaking like you wouldn’t believe,” Ross said. Both he and Sprouse thought they had collided with the F-14.

“I’ve got fire lights – let’s get out of here!” Ross shouted.

“I’m gone!” Sprouse said from the back seat as he pulled an ejection handle rigged to both seats.

Back on the F-14, [Dorsey’s backseater] Holland took to the airwaves. “Mayday! Mayday!” he shouted. “Got a kill on a Fox 4!” Within moments, the Navy brass was on the radio, demanding answers.

“I’m sorry,” Holland recalled Dorsey saying as they circled the downed aviators and watched the burning wreckage sink. “I guess I kind of screwed this up.”

That was before he started applying the DAMN method:

  1. Deny everything;
  2. Admit nothing;
  3. Make counteraccusations;
  4. Never change your story.

Within 30 minutes, a rescue helicopter from the Saratoga plucked Ross and Sprouse from the water and took them to the carrier. Their injuries were relatively minor – primarily a badly bruised hand for Ross and a dislocated shoulder for Sprouse.

Indeed, while Dorsey’s willful screw-up didn’t have big consequences for Dorsey, it did for RF-4C pilot Ross, who’s full of reconstructive hardware and in pain every day, to one extent or another:

His ejection caused a powerful whiplash that resulted in a degenerating spine and a premature end to a career he believed was on a path to make the rank of general.

“I’m not trying to say I flew when I was unable. I never did that,” Col. Ross said. “But it got to the point where I started getting myself in positions where I was doing more desk work than flying.”

All told, he said, he has had seven back surgeries in which surgeons have installed screws, plates and rods to keep him functional.

Fished out of the water and taken to the Saratoga, Col. Ross waited for an apology from Lt. Dorsey. It did not come until last year, when the former Air Force pilot received a note from Capt. Dorsey as his nomination was pending in the Senate Armed Services Committee.

Meanwhile, what’s a man who’s got a really bad character, and has decided to ply his Navy trade part-time as a Reservist, going to do with the rest of his waking hours? What the rest of the cheats, connivers and chiselers do: go to law school. And he became head, general counsel, and spokesman for a racket that cons lower-IQ lower-enlisted guys in military towns into overpaying for shoddy merchandise, and then gouges them with lawsuits, filed thousands of miles away in Virginia, where Blue Falcon Dorsey, like Admiral Daddy Dorsey before him, is “connected.”

Now, recently Dorsey’s personal and political pal, Attorney General Mark Herring of Virginia — whom you may remember as the guy who tried to singlehandedly erase all concealed-carry reciprocity of VA with other states, until the state legislature folded that dictate until it was all sharp corners and proceeded to clean out his polyps with it — announced that he had a great deal in the form of a settlement.

The deal is a great one — for Blue Falcon Dorsey and the other crooks of USA Discounters. They get rid of all past, present and future legal liabilities with a $40 million slush-fund infusion to Herring and other state AGs, cleaning up their balance sheet — and letting them continue to cheat service members to their heart’s content. Cha-chingg!

And the deal is a great one — for Herring, giving him $40 million in off the books money he can sluice to his pals in connected “non-profits.” Just in time for the 2016 election! Cha-chingg!

The deal is a crappy one for the service members that Dorsey used to, still does, and will continue to rip off, as Dorsey and Herring do the grip-n-grin and laugh about the chumps.

In the bad old days when a base/post, brigade/wing, or battalion/squadron commander was king, he would put chiselers like Dorsey’s USA Discounters “Off Limits” and let them work their wiles on the civilians. You can see why the last few Secretaries of Defense and the Navy, and their political buddies like Mark Herring, and their crony capitalists like Four-More-to-Ace Dorsey, have wanted to see the services “fundamentally transformed.”

But it turns out not to be necessary, because Almost Admiral Four-Short-of-Ace Lawyer Timothy W. Dorsey and his gang ran USA discounters into the ground. And it went bankrupt in 2015.

Don’t worry about Dorsey, though. You know ol’ Blue Falcon paid himself first.

(Many hat tips to Jonn and NHSparky at This Ain’t Hell for most of the links in this post. There was also a good story in the Washingtonian, but it’s not online any more, just a comic-book style illustration of Dorsey smoking the RF-4).

Scruff Face Loses a Round to Dead Chris Kyle

Law-ScaleAndHammerChris Kyle was already dead, but his widow Taya Kyle lost a large judgment in a lawsuit by Jesse “Scruff Face” Ventura against the estate of the murdered SEAL. Ventura, who in his pre-showbiz/politics life was a SEAL/UDT named James Janos, sued Kyle based on a sea story in Kyle’s book American Sniper. In the story, Kyle belts a former SEAL turned celebrity who’s badmouthing serving SEALS.

The description (physical and behavioral) seemed to fit Ventura, whom quite a few SEALS have wanted to haul off and sock in the jaw over the years, and before his untimely death, Kyle confirmed in a radio interview that he did mean Ventura. Ventura sued, and without Kyle to testify the preponderance of evidence suggests that Kyle’s story as published had, at least, been “improved.” Well, that’s the nature of sea stories, isn’t it?

But a jury seems to have awarded Ventura, who hasn’t amounted to much since his disastrous turn as a Minnesota governor, functionally all of the money Kyle made on his book. Taya Kyle appealed and the 8th Circuit handed her a large win — and smacked Scruff Face in the jaw, figuratively. The Minneapolis Red Star/Tribune’s Randy:

A three-judge panel unanimously threw out the $1.35 million award to Ventura for “unjust enrichment,” saying Minnesota law did not permit it. And in a 2-1 decision, it reversed the $500,000 award for defamation, remanding the case to the district court for a new trial on that question.

The decision was a victory for Taya Kyle, the widow of Navy SEAL Chris Kyle, who wrote the bestselling memoir “American Sniper” that Ventura said defamed him. It was also a win for national news organizations that had urged that the verdict be thrown out.

“If a person bringing a libel suit could collect not just for damages, but for unjust enrichment … the whole nature of libel law would have been changed in a very threatening way,” said Floyd Abrams, a prominent First Amendment attorney in New York, who had filed an amicus brief on behalf of 33 news organizations.

The ruling was a serious blow to Ventura, the former professional wrestler who served as governor from 1999 to 2003.

Only two guys know whether Chris Kyle belted Jesse Ventura on that boozy night in 2006, and Kyle’s station doesn’t come up on the net any more. (True or false, the story doesn’t reflect glory on either SEAL. “Hey, I decked some Social Security age dude?” And Ventura opened himself up for this kind of thing when he badmouthed the guys downrange during wartime, which is something he actually did even if he didn’t use the words Kyle’s story puts in his mouth).

We understand why Ventura would have the jaws about a story that paints him in a horrible  and negative light, especially compared to his carefully tended public persona. Doubly especially if that story is not true.

But what’s the right answer, if somebody lied about you? Is it to get the truth out, or is it to clean out the accounts of his widow and orphan? Pursuing this suit has just made Ventura look even worse. We totally understand why he might have done it, but he’s hurting himself.  And we’re here to predict that he’s going to fight this back in the district court (where the defamation judgment’s been remanded for a new trial) and to the Supreme Court (where he can appeal this 8th Circuit ruling, although it seems like a long shot). The story isn’t over. However unfortunate that may be for the reputation of the SEAL Teams and SOF in general.

Posted as a Public Service

rabid_dogTo all you Offender-Americans out there (yeah, they’re not exactly the demo for this blog. C’est dommage), we, the public-spirited staff of, commend the didactic message linked below.

We, ourselves, never thought of trying to address the criminal element directly. For one thing, they’re not big on reading. But as it turns out, one of our readers and commenters, Aesop, did indeed pen a personal advisory to criminals like the ones he sees handcuffed to bunks and gurneys in his ED at Callous Bastard Hospital, and posted it in his occasionally updated blog in April. And you really just have to read it.

We’ll just take one little snippet from this post. Now is the time to put down your beverages and make sure all fluids are safely downstream:

Two helpful bits of advice:

1) You can run from the cops, you can try to run from the police helicopter, but you cannot run away from the police dog.
Some cops are truly donut magnets, there are some places helicopters can’t fly, but anywhere you can run, a dog can run faster.
He is more agile than Officer Friendly, he cannot be reasoned with, and in 100% of cases, if you’re fleeing when he catches you, he’s gonna bite your ass, multiple times, which hurts a lot.
And then, he’ll get a Scooby Snack for his efforts from Officer Friendly.

You’ve probably noticed that he offered two helpful bits of advice. Well, to see the second one, you’re going to have to go Read The Whole Thing™.

And he’s not even done explaining why you don’t want to tangle with Officer K9.

Dude, Where’s My Gun?

An Orange County Sheriff's Department deputy left an AR like this, in its case with three loaded magazines, on the trunk of a patrol car before driving away. It remains missing. (Source: OCSD)

An Orange County Sheriff’s Department deputy left an AR like this, in its case with three loaded magazines, on the trunk of a patrol car before driving away. It remains missing. (Source: OCSD)

In California, where guns are getting closer to being outlawed every time the legislature sits, a police gun that had gone missing turned up, exactly the way cops don’t want it to: in a homicide. And that got the Orange County Register curious: how many other guns are missing from SoCal cop shops? The answer: at least 329.

Southern California police agencies regularly lose track of all manner of firearms, from high-powered rifles and grenade launchers to standard service handguns – weapons that often wind up on the street.An Orange County Register investigation of 134 state and local police agencies from Kern County to the Mexican border found that over the past five years at least 329 firearms were lost by or stolen from law enforcement agencies.Dozens of these weapons wound up in the hands of criminals – and some were involved in crimes. In Northern California, a missing police gun was used in a suspected murder.But the number of guns known to be missing or stolen is almost certainly a fraction of the actual number that have made the jump from police agency to street. Not every department audits its weaponry. If agencies performed such audits, they’d find they were missing more guns

via Police might not know where their guns are, and the law says thats OK – The Orange County Register.

Despite losing a lot of guns, the cop managers say it’s not big deal, because they have a lot of guns; they should get some slack for losing a few.

The Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department, following a request by the Register, assembled a team of nearly two dozen employees to track through thousands of files on gun location and gun assignments. The research found that at least 103 L.A. County Sheriff’s Department guns, ranging from service handguns to shotguns, were lost or stolen over the past five years.

Hey, that’s only 20-point-something a year!

A spokesperson said the agency didn’t previously know how many guns were missing, and hadn’t recently conducted a centralized count of its service handguns. The missing weapons are a tiny portion of the department’s 20,000-gun arsenal.

Is it just us, or does that spokesman’s “it’s only 103 out of 20,000” sound kind of like, “Dad, it’d be a good grade if Mrs Throttlebottom graded on a curve,” or what?

But say, while LASD might look like they’re all butterfingers with their guns compared to say, you or us (hey, we had one out of place for two days, and it nearly induced a-fib), they look like the Ayatollah of Inventory Controll-ah compared to the slipshod cop shops in Northern California, a couple of whom lose guns at a rate of fifty-plus a year.

In recent years, police departments in Oakland and San Jose counted their weapons, and each found more than 300 service firearms had vanished over a six-year period, according to a report from Southern California News Group’s sister publications in the San Francisco Bay area.

(The link is to a feature at the San Jose Mercury News). And these departments are the ones that raised their hands and accepted the foul in good grace. Some of them didn’t answer the door when the cops media knocked.

At least 24 agencies contacted over the past three months didn’t respond to requests for data on missing or stolen weapons. And the Long Beach Police Department, one of the bigger agencies in Southern California, said it doesn’t track weapons because its officers provide their own guns.

Gotta love Long Beach: “Not our circus, not our monkeys.” Yeah, that’s how ATF Phoenix Group VII felt until the guns they walked started killing Feds and not just “mere” Mexicans. Although, the comparison isn’t really fair to the policemen: unlike the ATF, they weren’t trying to lose the guns.

There are about 300 million guns in America, and nobody knows how many are owned or controlled by police agencies.

That number is almost certainly low — extremely low. Almost 300 million guns have been made or imported in the last 25 years! But that’s another story.

What is known is that it’s not rare for police and their weapons to go separate ways and that, in general, lost or stolen police guns account for some of the weapons used to commit crimes.

“A significant source of guns in illegal hands, on the black market, come from stolen firearms,” said Ari Freilich, staff attorney with San Francisco’s Law Center to Prevent Gun Violence.

“We should be concerned that police – and all individuals that keep deadly weapons – know where their guns are.”

Normally, Halley’s Comet comes around more frequently than a non-risible statement from a functionary of some gun-ban group like the Law Center, but Freilich’s last sentence is completely unobjectionable. He’s right. Of course, the news people seem to think the whole problem is caused by exempting cops from California’s violent-criminal-friendly gun storage laws:

[O]n- and off-duty police officers are allowed to store and carry weapons in ways that would be unlawful for other citizens in California. The theory behind that law is to make sure an officer doesn’t have to unlock a stored gun to use it in an emergency, but in practice it often leads to police guns being stolen.

An officer shouldn’t “have to unlock a stored gun to use it in an emergency,” but neither should any peaceable citizen. But the report, otherwise so good, seems not to have brought forward the key point. The problem of stolen guns leaching into the criminal black market really doesn’t stem from theft of guns held ready for self-defense, it primarily comes from guns stored in homes and cars and then stolen in residential and auto burglaries. Indeed, safe storage laws only go so far; as the old saying goes, “locks keep honest people out,” and a burglary in which burglars make off with a small safe or smash open a large one are distressingly common.

But you’re not helping by leaving them in an unlocked car, a common cop practice.

At least 22 of the stolen guns were retrieved. Authorities in Mexico recovered some guns stolen from U.S. law enforcement, while U.S. police found other weapons in the hands of fleeing felons.

Often, the reports show, officers treated their guns in ways that wouldn’t be legal for most civilians. High-caliber firepower was stowed in backpacks or gym bags and stuffed behind car seats. Handguns were stashed in center consoles or glove boxes. Burglars looking for weapons that on the street can be sold for several hundred to a couple of thousand dollars found them.

Makes our point about the sort of storage the criminals are exploiting, doesn’t it? A number of the thefts they go on to list (do Read The Whole Thing™) were from unlocked vehicles. Lots of shotguns and ARs were lost, including at least two full-auto M16s. Riverside PD lost a 40mm grenade launcher. And then there were these two bozos:

Two deputies, one in San Diego County and one in Orange County, separately left assault rifles worth $1,500 apiece on the trunks of their patrol cars and drove away. The Orange County deputy had put the rifle down to take a call on his cellphone, according to authorities. By the time the deputies realized what they had done, the weapons were gone. The California Highway Patrol found the San Diego rifle. The Orange County rifle remains on the streets.

There was another AR that was left in a locked patrol car — with the windows down. That one was recovered from the home of the drunk that winkled it out of the car. (We suspect that surveillance video came in with that save).

It’s unclear if agencies would welcome regulations requiring regular gun counts, but some police leaders believe the profession could do a better job of keeping track of weapons.

It’s staggering to think any agency wouldn’t do audits. Ask an FFL what happens if he tells his Industry Operations Inspector he’s missing a few firearms, and, incidentally, he last conducted an audit since Christ was a corporal. Or never. (Outcome: the next ATF official he’s talking to will probably be a special agent, not an IOI, and he’s not going to like the way the conversation goes).

Chuck Michel, an attorney who specializes in gun laws, said if police agencies were gun stores, many would go “out of business for the way they keep inventory.”

Amen. Sloppy inventory? Look at what happened to manufacturers CAV Arms and Stag. Again, do Read The Whole Thing™, and the feature on 944 missing NorCal cop guns in the Murky News, and check out the OC Register’s Database of Missing SoCal Cop Guns.

Meet the AH-64D Longboat

No, that wasn’t a typo. A Greek crew took their attack helicopter surfing. (NSFW warning: an obscenity, if you happen to know modern Greek).

The pilots both survived, although their military careers might not. (Russia Today says that the Greek military claimed the aircraft had engine failure. We note that the Apache is a twin-engine helicopter, and even on a hot day has no trouble flying on one engine at sea level.

Below sea level? That’s a problem.

Remember, pilots: you can never beat the World Low Flying Record. You can only tie.

Bubba’s Molested Mosin

This is better than the usual Bubba job; it’s merely poor conceptually and poorer workmanship, not the usual on-crack conceptually and drunk monkey workmanship.

Yes, that’s damning with faint praise. For crying out loud, look at it:


Bubba is not utterly lacking in self-awareness in this case. He titled both his imgur picture and his Reddit thread, “Ruined Russian Rifle: Shortened ’26 Tula Mosin.”

The Reddit crowd seemed to like it. It may say something about the end of the gun culture this Bubba is coming from that his nick there and on YouTube is “BooliganAirsoft.” He suggested that he was aiming for a “scout rifle,” conceptually.

That was the goal, something cheap, easy to shoot, short, and still with plenty of power behind it. This thing was completed for less than even a garbage blown out round receiver currently costs.

bubba-mosin-marksAssuming he got his ’26 hex receiver back when they were going for $75, that might be true, but… he’s put a couple hundred dollars and a gun that was now worth $300-400 together and produced a parts gun worth maybe $75. That’s not winning.

I’ve been sitting on this ’26 numbers matching Tula Mosin for the last 12 or so years, figured I’d finally ruin it. Had the barrel cut down to 16.5″ and finished with an 11 degree target crown, and threaded with 5/8×24. This was done on a CNC machine by a local friend at a large company who makes sweet gun things that we all know and love. Fitted a cheap two chamber muzzle brake which had “MOLON LABE” on the side, so I blued over that.

Stripped Olga’s shellac off the stock and refinished it with a simple poly coating. Nothing that’ll last forever, but I like how it turned out. Stock was a retrofit, no exciting markings to be found. Drilled and machined out the stock to fit the barrel length and reuse the stock dog collar sling. Cut the upper handguard to fit as well.

Here’s the Bubba job on the nose end of the stock:


It wouldn’t be a Bubba job without a Chinese schloptic (a portmanteau of schlock and optic), and here Bubba does not disappoint:

Aiming this thing is a piece of cake with a Kinetic Concealment reflex sight fitted on a 20mm rail adapter. This rail adapter took a ton of sanding to fit square, but it works and holds solid. Has a drilled anti-walk screw in the front, and it seems solid. I’m shocked the lens hasn’t popped off while firing this yet.


The Kinetic Concealment schloptic is a $50 Chinese imitation of a reflex, same as the ones sold to airsoft kiddies.

But what about that magazine? Well, Bubba wouldn’t be Bubba if it worked. It doesn’t, but that doesn’t dim this Bubba’s pride in his creation:

The 10 round mag is from Howling Raven. It needs a little love to feed properly, and I’m still having issues past 8 rounds, but the company has been great to work with at troubleshooting it.

So, this outfit that makes junk for Bubbas is sympathetic on the phone when Bubba calls with trouble? But they don’t actually fix the problem? Sounds like a match made in heaven!

Another commenter had similar problems with the same company’s Bubbamag for Mosins:

I really wish that HR mag would work. The follower (which is the spring) over tilts and jams like a [censored] on my mosin. On the plus side, their muzzle brake is pretty [censored] nice and cheap. Still have to run it to the range to see how well it works.

To which Airsoft Bubba replied:

I had to drown mine in FrogLube to get it to feed semi consistently. My issues are that past 8 rounds, they start to stack and the rim gets stuck in the body. The lube helps with that, but still, I stick with loading 7 rounds for now. For actual important shooting, I’d still stick with the stock 5 round setup for now.

FrogLube. Naturally. He was out of FireClean.

Finishing off the stock is a rubber pad to give me some extra length of pull (6’2″) and a pouch to hold a few extra rounds and my custom made Trogdor patch from Whiskey Two-Four. It’s called Trogdor because, well, it burninates pretty bad. Daylight fireballs are impressive and you feel like you just opened the oven.

Gee, like any short-barreled Mosin (like the ’38, ’44, and Type 53). What a discovery.

Shooting this is a blast, literally and figuratively. Accuracy is actually improved as the old crown was hot garbage water. I’ve taken it out to 75 yards to pop clay pigeons so far, longer range testing is still in the works, but I’m liking the results so far.

Here’s a video of the shooting:

And here’s a video of the build, if you dare:


Assclown of the Ides: Rudi Gresham, Legend in His Own Mind, #3

Rudi Gresham wearing a uniform, not one of whose insignia he actually earned.

Rudi Gresham wearing a uniform, not one of whose insignia he actually earned. No CPT, INF, SF, 7th Group, CIB, Master Blaster wings — every one’s a fraud.

We have written and have followed up once about the legendary SF phony, former peaked-at-PFC clerk and chaplain’s assistant Rudi Gresham. Gresham has been claiming for decades to be a retired major, or lieutenant colonel, or something — like most habitual liars he puts little effort into the consistency of his lies, even though he seems to have come to believe them himself.

Now that his deception has been exposed, he and his proxies are claiming he was a super-secret-squirrel CIA officer. Would you believe: he wasn’t that, either? With a bunkered-up Rudi having deleted most of his own social media presence, these claims are being advanced, in part,  by proxies such as SFA Chapter 34 head Mike Mika, a genuine SF vet who has partnered with Rudi in some charitable endeavors. Another Rudi defender, SF vet and author Don Bendell, has turned on his former friend, after evidence that Rudi had lied and had cheated Don out of money became overwhelming. Don prides himself on being a man of honor. Imagine how betrayed he must feel.

In fact, this has been a very profitable, if underhanded, imposture for Rudi. What he seems to have done to Don is to offer to act as a middleman to facilitate a donation to a worthy cause, and then give the recipient half of the donation Don gave him to pass on!

Remember what we like to say about phonies: it’s never just Stolen Valor with these guys. There’s always some other misconduct comorbid with the imposture.

When Guardian of Valor outed Rudi (something that many in the SF community had known was coming, as it had been discussed in private forums closed to the public and to any non-SF person, such as, for instance, Rudi), Don Bendell was one of the friends who sprang to his defense — at first. As GOV puts it in a 27 August update:

After our story was published, we received countless emails and phone-calls from former colleagues of Gresham’s, and those that had supported him all the way up until we outed him. One certain person was Rudis best friend. He defended him and told us we had no clue what we were talking about, that Rudi was an honorable man.. until he saw the evidence. Once we presented him with it, he was devastated to say the least.

He confronted Rudi, who admitted to Don that he was in fact lying about being a Special Forces Retired Officer. In an email sent to Mr. Gresham from his former friend, he tells him of the incident in which he admitted this.

Don didn’t just send the letter to Rudi, and to GOV. He BCC’d it to everybody who’s anybody in the SF community, and asked that it be shared in the private fora mentioned above.

We had been sitting on Don’s dynamite letter because we did not know if he wanted it published beyond those private places. Guardian of Valor has published the whole thing as a screen shot as part of that update; let us know in the comments if there’s demand for selectable text, ’cause it’s still sitting in our inbox.

This is somewhat personal for your humble blogger. Not as personal as it is for poor Don, an honorable vet who was lied to and ripped off face to face by Rudi Gresham, shameless SF fraud. But it’s still personal enough. We make no Vietnam claims here, but came by our SF and Ranger tabs, and our memberships in SFA and SOA, legitimately. It is personally highly vexatious that a phony could simply assert such things, and then, having used such phony credentials to worm himself into high places, Gresham today is using his relationships with politicians and former executive appointees to try to shore up his false claims.

It doesn’t matter how many selfies he’s got with Jeb! Bush, or Lindsey Graham, or Tony Principi, or Mike Hayden. Rudi Gresham is a fraud. He used that long-running fraud for personal gain, often at the expense of charities he claimed to be helping (or in the case of some charities, the whole thing was as big a fraud as Rudi’s claimed career).

He profited greatly by these false claims. There is no legal recourse because the Supreme Court, nine lawyers untainted by real-world exposure (or military service), ruled that, while they fully support jailing phonies who pretend to be lawyers, Stolen Valor frauds are just using their First Amendment rights to promote themselves, and who cares who’s a real veteran anyway? Truly an attitude you need to be within Uber range of an Acela Express stop to hold.

Rudi’s strongest surviving defender, Mike Mika, appears to be entirely legit as an SF vet. And, unlike Rudi, he seems to be involved in vets’ and Montagnard charities on a basis of selfless service, which is admirable. But to put the most charitable spin possible on it, he has been blinded by Rudi’s donations to his causes — donations which, if Rudi treats them like he did the ones from Don, he skimmed rather badly without telling Mike — and he still defends him. GOV tells this story (“Mike” is Mike Mika):

[T]he Mike he is speaking of in the email, I was contacted by, was the President of the local Special Forces Association which Rudi had recently resigned from after being a  member for a several years.  He is the author of the website supporting Rudi Gresham. He told me he had some information that would change my mind about Rudi and asked to meet with me one afternoon, and I agreed. At this meeting I was asked not to discuss much of it…

…a sure sign of bullshit…

…but it was agreed that Rudi was never an officer in the US Army (agreed by Mike Mika) and that the main concern was over a lawsuit stemming from the Martin Luther King family and the book “Killing The Dream”, by Gerald Posner.

This is utter nonsense. There was such a lawsuit between various Kings — who are understandably protective of their late father’s image — and Posner, but it was settled many years ago. It appears to have been about the King family and James Earl Ray’s defense attorney trying to establish that there might have been a conspiracy to kill King. (Posner, trained as an attorney, makes a case in his book and argues convincingly that there was no conspiracy, and James Earl Ray murdered Rev. King alone ). And it has nothing to do with whether Rudi is a phony. It’s just more poo flung from the monkey cage to try to distract people from Rudi’s endless (until 2016, anyway) impersonation.

It seems that Mr. Gresham is quoted throughout an entire chapter in that book, and maybe this could start some new theories. Who knows?

No, it just means that author Gerald Posner is one more victim of Rudi’s long-running deception campaign.

Like I told them, my only concern is the truth about Mr. Gresham’s background, not this other stuff. So again they tried to show me the letter from General Yarborough, and again I tell them that this holds no water as it was written in the 90’s.

They also showed me photos of Mr. Gresham with the director of the CIA, trying to also convince me that he was also some type of secret agent for the Government. I had to just shake my head. We left the meeting with a promise to meet with Mr. Gresham the following Friday in Charleston, S.C. I awaited the phone call for the meeting but it never happened.

One of the fascinating things about Rudi is his involvement with Thomas Burch in the phony charity the National Vietnam Veterans Foundation. Both were SF phonies. Burch had a slightly stronger claim, because he was just promoting himself from a JAG assigned to SF in Vietnam to a FAG (Former Action Guy); Rudi’s claims were even more outrageous as he never rose above PFC and never got closer to Vietnam than Fayetteville, North Carolina. But what fascinates us is the possibility that both were so deep in their impersonations that neither one seems to have realized that the other was a phony, too. 

It has happened before: two Texas guys started a Vietnam War museum: they claimed SEAL and SF, and each believed the other was telling the truth, even though he knew he himself was lying. Was that the deal with Burch and Gresham and their phony charity? We’ll never know, will we? It’s not like we’re going to get straight answers out of these guys. They’re going to lie until their last breath, and then, the gravedigger will need to use a corkscrew to make the holes for ’em.

Let’s not forget who Hans Rudolf “Rudi” Gresham really is. Private First Class. (And in retrospect, promotion to that grade sounds like a classic Army error). Clerk-typist. Chaplain’s Assistant. And, as his actual DD 214 says, “Nothing follows.”