Category Archives: Don’t be THAT guy

Dude, Where’s My Gun?

An Orange County Sheriff's Department deputy left an AR like this, in its case with three loaded magazines, on the trunk of a patrol car before driving away. It remains missing. (Source: OCSD)

An Orange County Sheriff’s Department deputy left an AR like this, in its case with three loaded magazines, on the trunk of a patrol car before driving away. It remains missing. (Source: OCSD)

In California, where guns are getting closer to being outlawed every time the legislature sits, a police gun that had gone missing turned up, exactly the way cops don’t want it to: in a homicide. And that got the Orange County Register curious: how many other guns are missing from SoCal cop shops? The answer: at least 329.

Southern California police agencies regularly lose track of all manner of firearms, from high-powered rifles and grenade launchers to standard service handguns – weapons that often wind up on the street.An Orange County Register investigation of 134 state and local police agencies from Kern County to the Mexican border found that over the past five years at least 329 firearms were lost by or stolen from law enforcement agencies.Dozens of these weapons wound up in the hands of criminals – and some were involved in crimes. In Northern California, a missing police gun was used in a suspected murder.But the number of guns known to be missing or stolen is almost certainly a fraction of the actual number that have made the jump from police agency to street. Not every department audits its weaponry. If agencies performed such audits, they’d find they were missing more guns

via Police might not know where their guns are, and the law says thats OK – The Orange County Register.

Despite losing a lot of guns, the cop managers say it’s not big deal, because they have a lot of guns; they should get some slack for losing a few.

The Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department, following a request by the Register, assembled a team of nearly two dozen employees to track through thousands of files on gun location and gun assignments. The research found that at least 103 L.A. County Sheriff’s Department guns, ranging from service handguns to shotguns, were lost or stolen over the past five years.

Hey, that’s only 20-point-something a year!

A spokesperson said the agency didn’t previously know how many guns were missing, and hadn’t recently conducted a centralized count of its service handguns. The missing weapons are a tiny portion of the department’s 20,000-gun arsenal.

Is it just us, or does that spokesman’s “it’s only 103 out of 20,000” sound kind of like, “Dad, it’d be a good grade if Mrs Throttlebottom graded on a curve,” or what?

But say, while LASD might look like they’re all butterfingers with their guns compared to say, you or us (hey, we had one out of place for two days, and it nearly induced a-fib), they look like the Ayatollah of Inventory Controll-ah compared to the slipshod cop shops in Northern California, a couple of whom lose guns at a rate of fifty-plus a year.

In recent years, police departments in Oakland and San Jose counted their weapons, and each found more than 300 service firearms had vanished over a six-year period, according to a report from Southern California News Group’s sister publications in the San Francisco Bay area.

(The link is to a feature at the San Jose Mercury News). And these departments are the ones that raised their hands and accepted the foul in good grace. Some of them didn’t answer the door when the cops media knocked.

At least 24 agencies contacted over the past three months didn’t respond to requests for data on missing or stolen weapons. And the Long Beach Police Department, one of the bigger agencies in Southern California, said it doesn’t track weapons because its officers provide their own guns.

Gotta love Long Beach: “Not our circus, not our monkeys.” Yeah, that’s how ATF Phoenix Group VII felt until the guns they walked started killing Feds and not just “mere” Mexicans. Although, the comparison isn’t really fair to the policemen: unlike the ATF, they weren’t trying to lose the guns.

There are about 300 million guns in America, and nobody knows how many are owned or controlled by police agencies.

That number is almost certainly low — extremely low. Almost 300 million guns have been made or imported in the last 25 years! But that’s another story.

What is known is that it’s not rare for police and their weapons to go separate ways and that, in general, lost or stolen police guns account for some of the weapons used to commit crimes.

“A significant source of guns in illegal hands, on the black market, come from stolen firearms,” said Ari Freilich, staff attorney with San Francisco’s Law Center to Prevent Gun Violence.

“We should be concerned that police – and all individuals that keep deadly weapons – know where their guns are.”

Normally, Halley’s Comet comes around more frequently than a non-risible statement from a functionary of some gun-ban group like the Law Center, but Freilich’s last sentence is completely unobjectionable. He’s right. Of course, the news people seem to think the whole problem is caused by exempting cops from California’s violent-criminal-friendly gun storage laws:

[O]n- and off-duty police officers are allowed to store and carry weapons in ways that would be unlawful for other citizens in California. The theory behind that law is to make sure an officer doesn’t have to unlock a stored gun to use it in an emergency, but in practice it often leads to police guns being stolen.

An officer shouldn’t “have to unlock a stored gun to use it in an emergency,” but neither should any peaceable citizen. But the report, otherwise so good, seems not to have brought forward the key point. The problem of stolen guns leaching into the criminal black market really doesn’t stem from theft of guns held ready for self-defense, it primarily comes from guns stored in homes and cars and then stolen in residential and auto burglaries. Indeed, safe storage laws only go so far; as the old saying goes, “locks keep honest people out,” and a burglary in which burglars make off with a small safe or smash open a large one are distressingly common.

But you’re not helping by leaving them in an unlocked car, a common cop practice.

At least 22 of the stolen guns were retrieved. Authorities in Mexico recovered some guns stolen from U.S. law enforcement, while U.S. police found other weapons in the hands of fleeing felons.

Often, the reports show, officers treated their guns in ways that wouldn’t be legal for most civilians. High-caliber firepower was stowed in backpacks or gym bags and stuffed behind car seats. Handguns were stashed in center consoles or glove boxes. Burglars looking for weapons that on the street can be sold for several hundred to a couple of thousand dollars found them.

Makes our point about the sort of storage the criminals are exploiting, doesn’t it? A number of the thefts they go on to list (do Read The Whole Thing™) were from unlocked vehicles. Lots of shotguns and ARs were lost, including at least two full-auto M16s. Riverside PD lost a 40mm grenade launcher. And then there were these two bozos:

Two deputies, one in San Diego County and one in Orange County, separately left assault rifles worth $1,500 apiece on the trunks of their patrol cars and drove away. The Orange County deputy had put the rifle down to take a call on his cellphone, according to authorities. By the time the deputies realized what they had done, the weapons were gone. The California Highway Patrol found the San Diego rifle. The Orange County rifle remains on the streets.

There was another AR that was left in a locked patrol car — with the windows down. That one was recovered from the home of the drunk that winkled it out of the car. (We suspect that surveillance video came in with that save).

It’s unclear if agencies would welcome regulations requiring regular gun counts, but some police leaders believe the profession could do a better job of keeping track of weapons.

It’s staggering to think any agency wouldn’t do audits. Ask an FFL what happens if he tells his Industry Operations Inspector he’s missing a few firearms, and, incidentally, he last conducted an audit since Christ was a corporal. Or never. (Outcome: the next ATF official he’s talking to will probably be a special agent, not an IOI, and he’s not going to like the way the conversation goes).

Chuck Michel, an attorney who specializes in gun laws, said if police agencies were gun stores, many would go “out of business for the way they keep inventory.”

Amen. Sloppy inventory? Look at what happened to manufacturers CAV Arms and Stag. Again, do Read The Whole Thing™, and the feature on 944 missing NorCal cop guns in the Murky News, and check out the OC Register’s Database of Missing SoCal Cop Guns.

Meet the AH-64D Longboat

No, that wasn’t a typo. A Greek crew took their attack helicopter surfing. (NSFW warning: an obscenity, if you happen to know modern Greek).

The pilots both survived, although their military careers might not. (Russia Today says that the Greek military claimed the aircraft had engine failure. We note that the Apache is a twin-engine helicopter, and even on a hot day has no trouble flying on one engine at sea level.

Below sea level? That’s a problem.

Remember, pilots: you can never beat the World Low Flying Record. You can only tie.

Bubba’s Molested Mosin

This is better than the usual Bubba job; it’s merely poor conceptually and poorer workmanship, not the usual on-crack conceptually and drunk monkey workmanship.

Yes, that’s damning with faint praise. For crying out loud, look at it:

bubba-massaged-mosin

Bubba is not utterly lacking in self-awareness in this case. He titled both his imgur picture and his Reddit thread, “Ruined Russian Rifle: Shortened ’26 Tula Mosin.”

The Reddit crowd seemed to like it. It may say something about the end of the gun culture this Bubba is coming from that his nick there and on YouTube is “BooliganAirsoft.” He suggested that he was aiming for a “scout rifle,” conceptually.

That was the goal, something cheap, easy to shoot, short, and still with plenty of power behind it. This thing was completed for less than even a garbage blown out round receiver currently costs.

bubba-mosin-marksAssuming he got his ’26 hex receiver back when they were going for $75, that might be true, but… he’s put a couple hundred dollars and a gun that was now worth $300-400 together and produced a parts gun worth maybe $75. That’s not winning.

I’ve been sitting on this ’26 numbers matching Tula Mosin for the last 12 or so years, figured I’d finally ruin it. Had the barrel cut down to 16.5″ and finished with an 11 degree target crown, and threaded with 5/8×24. This was done on a CNC machine by a local friend at a large company who makes sweet gun things that we all know and love. Fitted a cheap two chamber muzzle brake which had “MOLON LABE” on the side, so I blued over that.

Stripped Olga’s shellac off the stock and refinished it with a simple poly coating. Nothing that’ll last forever, but I like how it turned out. Stock was a retrofit, no exciting markings to be found. Drilled and machined out the stock to fit the barrel length and reuse the stock dog collar sling. Cut the upper handguard to fit as well.

Here’s the Bubba job on the nose end of the stock:

bubba-mosin-muzzle

It wouldn’t be a Bubba job without a Chinese schloptic (a portmanteau of schlock and optic), and here Bubba does not disappoint:

Aiming this thing is a piece of cake with a Kinetic Concealment reflex sight fitted on a 20mm rail adapter. This rail adapter took a ton of sanding to fit square, but it works and holds solid. Has a drilled anti-walk screw in the front, and it seems solid. I’m shocked the lens hasn’t popped off while firing this yet.

bubba-mosin-sight

The Kinetic Concealment schloptic is a $50 Chinese imitation of a reflex, same as the ones sold to airsoft kiddies.

But what about that magazine? Well, Bubba wouldn’t be Bubba if it worked. It doesn’t, but that doesn’t dim this Bubba’s pride in his creation:

The 10 round mag is from Howling Raven. It needs a little love to feed properly, and I’m still having issues past 8 rounds, but the company has been great to work with at troubleshooting it.

So, this outfit that makes junk for Bubbas is sympathetic on the phone when Bubba calls with trouble? But they don’t actually fix the problem? Sounds like a match made in heaven!

Another commenter had similar problems with the same company’s Bubbamag for Mosins:

I really wish that HR mag would work. The follower (which is the spring) over tilts and jams like a [censored] on my mosin. On the plus side, their muzzle brake is pretty [censored] nice and cheap. Still have to run it to the range to see how well it works.

To which Airsoft Bubba replied:

I had to drown mine in FrogLube to get it to feed semi consistently. My issues are that past 8 rounds, they start to stack and the rim gets stuck in the body. The lube helps with that, but still, I stick with loading 7 rounds for now. For actual important shooting, I’d still stick with the stock 5 round setup for now.

FrogLube. Naturally. He was out of FireClean.

Finishing off the stock is a rubber pad to give me some extra length of pull (6’2″) and a pouch to hold a few extra rounds and my custom made Trogdor patch from Whiskey Two-Four. It’s called Trogdor because, well, it burninates pretty bad. Daylight fireballs are impressive and you feel like you just opened the oven.

Gee, like any short-barreled Mosin (like the ’38, ’44, and Type 53). What a discovery.

Shooting this is a blast, literally and figuratively. Accuracy is actually improved as the old crown was hot garbage water. I’ve taken it out to 75 yards to pop clay pigeons so far, longer range testing is still in the works, but I’m liking the results so far.

Here’s a video of the shooting:

And here’s a video of the build, if you dare:

 

Assclown of the Ides: Rudi Gresham, Legend in His Own Mind, #3

Rudi Gresham wearing a uniform, not one of whose insignia he actually earned.

Rudi Gresham wearing a uniform, not one of whose insignia he actually earned. No CPT, INF, SF, 7th Group, CIB, Master Blaster wings — every one’s a fraud.

We have written and have followed up once about the legendary SF phony, former peaked-at-PFC clerk and chaplain’s assistant Rudi Gresham. Gresham has been claiming for decades to be a retired major, or lieutenant colonel, or something — like most habitual liars he puts little effort into the consistency of his lies, even though he seems to have come to believe them himself.

Now that his deception has been exposed, he and his proxies are claiming he was a super-secret-squirrel CIA officer. Would you believe: he wasn’t that, either? With a bunkered-up Rudi having deleted most of his own social media presence, these claims are being advanced, in part,  by proxies such as SFA Chapter 34 head Mike Mika, a genuine SF vet who has partnered with Rudi in some charitable endeavors. Another Rudi defender, SF vet and author Don Bendell, has turned on his former friend, after evidence that Rudi had lied and had cheated Don out of money became overwhelming. Don prides himself on being a man of honor. Imagine how betrayed he must feel.

In fact, this has been a very profitable, if underhanded, imposture for Rudi. What he seems to have done to Don is to offer to act as a middleman to facilitate a donation to a worthy cause, and then give the recipient half of the donation Don gave him to pass on!

Remember what we like to say about phonies: it’s never just Stolen Valor with these guys. There’s always some other misconduct comorbid with the imposture.

When Guardian of Valor outed Rudi (something that many in the SF community had known was coming, as it had been discussed in private forums closed to the public and to any non-SF person, such as, for instance, Rudi), Don Bendell was one of the friends who sprang to his defense — at first. As GOV puts it in a 27 August update:

After our story was published, we received countless emails and phone-calls from former colleagues of Gresham’s, and those that had supported him all the way up until we outed him. One certain person was Rudis best friend. He defended him and told us we had no clue what we were talking about, that Rudi was an honorable man.. until he saw the evidence. Once we presented him with it, he was devastated to say the least.

He confronted Rudi, who admitted to Don that he was in fact lying about being a Special Forces Retired Officer. In an email sent to Mr. Gresham from his former friend, he tells him of the incident in which he admitted this.

Don didn’t just send the letter to Rudi, and to GOV. He BCC’d it to everybody who’s anybody in the SF community, and asked that it be shared in the private fora mentioned above.

We had been sitting on Don’s dynamite letter because we did not know if he wanted it published beyond those private places. Guardian of Valor has published the whole thing as a screen shot as part of that update; let us know in the comments if there’s demand for selectable text, ’cause it’s still sitting in our inbox.

This is somewhat personal for your humble blogger. Not as personal as it is for poor Don, an honorable vet who was lied to and ripped off face to face by Rudi Gresham, shameless SF fraud. But it’s still personal enough. We make no Vietnam claims here, but came by our SF and Ranger tabs, and our memberships in SFA and SOA, legitimately. It is personally highly vexatious that a phony could simply assert such things, and then, having used such phony credentials to worm himself into high places, Gresham today is using his relationships with politicians and former executive appointees to try to shore up his false claims.

It doesn’t matter how many selfies he’s got with Jeb! Bush, or Lindsey Graham, or Tony Principi, or Mike Hayden. Rudi Gresham is a fraud. He used that long-running fraud for personal gain, often at the expense of charities he claimed to be helping (or in the case of some charities, the whole thing was as big a fraud as Rudi’s claimed career).

He profited greatly by these false claims. There is no legal recourse because the Supreme Court, nine lawyers untainted by real-world exposure (or military service), ruled that, while they fully support jailing phonies who pretend to be lawyers, Stolen Valor frauds are just using their First Amendment rights to promote themselves, and who cares who’s a real veteran anyway? Truly an attitude you need to be within Uber range of an Acela Express stop to hold.

Rudi’s strongest surviving defender, Mike Mika, appears to be entirely legit as an SF vet. And, unlike Rudi, he seems to be involved in vets’ and Montagnard charities on a basis of selfless service, which is admirable. But to put the most charitable spin possible on it, he has been blinded by Rudi’s donations to his causes — donations which, if Rudi treats them like he did the ones from Don, he skimmed rather badly without telling Mike — and he still defends him. GOV tells this story (“Mike” is Mike Mika):

[T]he Mike he is speaking of in the email, I was contacted by, was the President of the local Special Forces Association which Rudi had recently resigned from after being a  member for a several years.  He is the author of the website supporting Rudi Gresham. He told me he had some information that would change my mind about Rudi and asked to meet with me one afternoon, and I agreed. At this meeting I was asked not to discuss much of it…

…a sure sign of bullshit…

…but it was agreed that Rudi was never an officer in the US Army (agreed by Mike Mika) and that the main concern was over a lawsuit stemming from the Martin Luther King family and the book “Killing The Dream”, by Gerald Posner.

This is utter nonsense. There was such a lawsuit between various Kings — who are understandably protective of their late father’s image — and Posner, but it was settled many years ago. It appears to have been about the King family and James Earl Ray’s defense attorney trying to establish that there might have been a conspiracy to kill King. (Posner, trained as an attorney, makes a case in his book and argues convincingly that there was no conspiracy, and James Earl Ray murdered Rev. King alone ). And it has nothing to do with whether Rudi is a phony. It’s just more poo flung from the monkey cage to try to distract people from Rudi’s endless (until 2016, anyway) impersonation.

It seems that Mr. Gresham is quoted throughout an entire chapter in that book, and maybe this could start some new theories. Who knows?

No, it just means that author Gerald Posner is one more victim of Rudi’s long-running deception campaign.

Like I told them, my only concern is the truth about Mr. Gresham’s background, not this other stuff. So again they tried to show me the letter from General Yarborough, and again I tell them that this holds no water as it was written in the 90’s.

They also showed me photos of Mr. Gresham with the director of the CIA, trying to also convince me that he was also some type of secret agent for the Government. I had to just shake my head. We left the meeting with a promise to meet with Mr. Gresham the following Friday in Charleston, S.C. I awaited the phone call for the meeting but it never happened.

One of the fascinating things about Rudi is his involvement with Thomas Burch in the phony charity the National Vietnam Veterans Foundation. Both were SF phonies. Burch had a slightly stronger claim, because he was just promoting himself from a JAG assigned to SF in Vietnam to a FAG (Former Action Guy); Rudi’s claims were even more outrageous as he never rose above PFC and never got closer to Vietnam than Fayetteville, North Carolina. But what fascinates us is the possibility that both were so deep in their impersonations that neither one seems to have realized that the other was a phony, too. 

It has happened before: two Texas guys started a Vietnam War museum: they claimed SEAL and SF, and each believed the other was telling the truth, even though he knew he himself was lying. Was that the deal with Burch and Gresham and their phony charity? We’ll never know, will we? It’s not like we’re going to get straight answers out of these guys. They’re going to lie until their last breath, and then, the gravedigger will need to use a corkscrew to make the holes for ’em.

Let’s not forget who Hans Rudolf “Rudi” Gresham really is. Private First Class. (And in retrospect, promotion to that grade sounds like a classic Army error). Clerk-typist. Chaplain’s Assistant. And, as his actual DD 214 says, “Nothing follows.”

How Wall Street Celebrated 9/11

Here’s a group of Wall Street banksters, from Goldman Sachs or one of those other gangs of greedheads, celebrating 9/11 last week:

goldman-sachs-values

Yes, that’s a group of [censored]s taking selfies with a blow-up doll and yukking it up at the memorial. Supposedly it was the bachelor party for the cretin with the inflate-a-date. May his wedding bring him the bride he deserves (it probably will. No doubt she, too, has no values beyond the shallow, selfish, and material. The Gods of the Copybook Headings are already preparing to chortle over the divorce settlement).

Look at these guys (and the pictures of them and their buddies at the link). No wonder a bunch of illiterate goatherds, who aspire to marry a sister or cousin like Dad did, and wipe themselves with their own hands, think they can beat us.

According to the Daily Mail, these  were Britons working in one of the big, lawless, tasteless, and classless American banks. Obviously they’ve combined the moral leprosy of their own nation’s legendary football hooligans with the moral ebola of their shallowest and crudest American hosts, and steeped the resulting concoction in the Petri dish of the crude and greedy Manhattan banker culture.

They continued this unseemly show until an officer of the NYPD asked them to leave. They argued with him, of course. (After all, laws don’t apply to Wall Street people. And if they look like they might, a quick contribution to the right foundation will fix things).

Wall Street values are Goldman Sachs values. And this is what they look like in action.

You could ask God to damn their souls, but they don’t believe they have any souls — just appetites. And they may be right.

UPDATE

We found lot of others writing about this yesterday after we drafted our story.

Delayed Report of Delayed Justice

anjemchoudaryIt’s been almost a month since it was revealed that mohammedan hate preacher Anjem Choudary, who called for murders of Britons and other Westerners, even as the dysfunctional British welfare system supported him and his family at upper-class income levels, finally was convicted and will be sentenced to prison. (Update: has been. Good).

He seemed to have such impunity that other British pro-terrorist moslems began to suspect that he was actually a “grass,” or an informer for the authorities. But he wasn’t; Scotland Yard, MI5 and the Crown Prosecution Service were simply staggeringly inept at making a case against him. (Scotland Yard’s CT Command had 12.1 TB of surveillance data on the guy, distributed across hundreds of devices, amassed over 20 years). The Grauniad published a long story on his rise and fall on 16 August.

The lifting of legal restrictions on Tuesday means the public can be told of his conviction for encouraging support for Islamic State. Choudary and his co-defendant, Mohammed Rahman, 33, were convicted in July but details of the trial, including the verdict, could not be reported until now. It comes after years of widespread bafflement as to how he avoided going to jail for terrorism offences.

The view that Choudary played a pernicious role in funneling people towards terrorism has remarkable levels of agreement across the political and religious spectrum.

It is shared by intelligence agencies across Europe, with one saying his groups had a sometimes “explicitly violent ideology”. But it is also shared by groups on the political left and right, as well as moderate Muslims. Even some alleged extremist Muslim figures in Britain privately say they suspected all along that Choudary was pushing young Muslims towards terrorism, and were suspicious when he was not stopped.

When you’ve lost the extremist moslems, who’s left for your jihad?

“He was always a bit loopy,” says one long-term Muslim acquaintance of Choudary. But he got more extreme in the last 15 years: “He fell off the edge and got worse and worse.”

The story is somewhat disorganized; the writers have apparently never heard of pyramidal news story structure. But being the Grauniad, they’re well-wired into the British moslem terror-supporting community, and they pull some interesting quotes. We do recommend you Read The Whole Thing™.

Still, for all we bag on the British lefty paper, they do have some self-awareness: another article noted that moslems themselves charge that Choudary is not a creature of British moslems, but a product of the media, who adored and encouraged his newspaper-selling bold and controversial statements. Miqdaad Versi, of the Muslim Council of Britain, was quoted:

His pulpit was not to be found in mosques but on the television screen and in national newspapers.

Choudary’s notoriety allowed him to reach the impressionable and vulnerable young people who felt alienated from the rest of society.

Of course, Versi wouldn’t be much of a mohammedan if he didn’t turn it around and blame … the authorities:

Choudary’s imprisonment is also a reminder of the shoddy state of counter-extremism in Britain…. Hasty and ill-thought-through measures have alienated the very Muslims who have kicked out extremists such as Choudary from their mosques.

A few days ago, he was sentenced to 5 years 6 months, which in Britain means 2 years. He will have a sort of loose parole called a “Notification Period” for 15 years; the story’s unclear about whether that starts now or when he walks out of HM prison to the “allah hu akbars” of his terrorist followers, who so chanted at his sentencing.

Hey, a couple of years is a start. Allah hu lockbar.

Do British prisons have skinheads and wannabe Aryans? Of course, they must. (Where else do guys like that wind up?) Can we make a suggestion about Choudary’s cellmates?

How To Explain Why You Hate Poseurs

stolen-valor-SF-phonyCall them what you will — poseurs, wannabes, walts, blowfish, or the World War I vintage term, “four-flusher” — but we hate ’em. Doesn’t even matter if they’re faking our service. A guy who pretends to be a Naval Aviator or a Marine Scout Sniper infuriates us just as much as some goon rockin’ an unearned Green Beret, and we’re pretty sure that the beret goon also gets up the nose of our Navy, Marine and Air Force bros.

That said, it’s easy to discuss this with fellow vets, because we’re all pretty much on the same page, regardless of what heights we scaled (or depths we plumbed) during our time in uniform. But it’s hard to get it across to most civilians. That’s probably why the Supreme Court invalidated the Stolen Valor Act. None of them are actual vets, are they? They’re all Yarvard lawyers. They would never find against a prohibition on practicing law without passing the Bar Exam — that’s something that hits them where they live.

But military service? Meaningless, foreign, distant and contemptible — that’s how the Justices of the Supreme Court see you, and how the vast majority of judges and lawyers see you.

So this article by Scott Faith at Havok Journal, which is almost a year old, is a pretty good resource when some judge, lawyer, or other non-military person looks at you in complete puzzlement when you’re ranting about the medieval tortures you have in mind for some poseur. It’s called “Why Veterans Hate Posers So, So, So, SO Very Much,” and that’s just what it is.

Faith makes a real effort to explain why we loathe poseurs, and who is and isn’t one:

So who isn’t a poser under this definition?  The short answer is, outward appearance on its own doesn’t count, it’s all about intent.  People who wear military-style fatigues to do rugged work like hunting, or simply to stay warm, are not posers.  Children who are obviously too young for military service aren’t posers.  People who wear military-themed clothing, including unit- or qualification-specific shirts or hats, are not automatically posers (do you think everyone wearing an NFL jersey played professional football?).  Legitimate re-enactors aren’t posers, and as for Airsofters… well, that’s debatable.  Anyway, even celebrities who wear stylized military uniforms or hipsters who wear military-style jackets or hats to be “ironic” aren’t posers, they’re just douchebags.  That’s an important difference.

He even creates a taxonomy of four classes of the scrotes. And he runs through the possible solutions, including the all-time favorite:

Unfortunately, the “summarized ass whipping” is not recognized as a legal course of action, so most of the time military posers do not get the punishment they so richly deserve…. So now it’s pretty much an open invitation for military posers, to include well-known celebrity actors like Shia LaBeouf, to carry on however they want.

The fact of the matter is, what most of these guys need is a personal and particularized beating, but the lawyers (see above comments about the vet-hostile ethos of the Supreme Court) won’t let you do that.

So… Big Boy Rules are in effect. Don’t get caught.

Ted Bundy’s Pistol?

Somebody owns this, and takes pride in the ownership of Ted Bundy’s former boot gun. And it can be yours, instead: for a price.

ted bundys rossi pistol 5

The GunBroker ad is headlined:

TED BUNDY’S BOOT GUN. YES, TED BUNDY, SERIAL KILLER

ted bundys rossi pistol

That certainly endears it to you, no?

The pistol is, to be blunt, a piece of crap: a Rossi .22 caliber cap-and-ball double-barrel pistol, with dual hammers and dual triggers. These used to be sold widely (and may still be, for all we know) as essentially unregulated toys in most states.ted bundys rossi pistol 7 (Some states, like Massachusetts and New Jersey, regulate antique and replica guns as stringently as real, modern, practical guns). The seller says (although he said it in ALL UPPER CASE, we’ll spare you the shouting, and his erratic punctuation, too):

ted bundys rossi pistol 6

 

Theodore Robert “Ted” Bundy’s Boot Gun. Yes, Ted Bundy, serial killer of at least 36 murders and experts say closer to 100…. Firearm is a Rossi 22 black powder cap and ball. Comes with holster and letter of authenticity of how a special operations officer Grover Ayers, Jr with the Ft. Walton Beach Sheriffs Office acquired the firearm. Truly one of a kind. There is only one.

ted bundys rossi pistol 2Bundy was a nasty piece of work, “the most cold-hearted son of a bitch you’ll ever meet” in his own words, so nasty that being a serial killer of young women wasn’t the most rebarbative of his behaviors. He would stash his kills and return to them, to commit bizarre necrophiliac rituals.

Worse, he attended law school (although he did do society a solid and drop out to focus on rape and murder instead).

Unlike most serial killers, Bundy seems to have been eager to alter his MO in order to conceal his misdeeds. Most of what we know about his murders comes from forensic evidence. There is a great deal of information from Bundy’s own statements, confessions and boasts, but Bundy was the archetype of the unreliable narrator. Still, his preferred methods of homicide appear to have been strangling or bludgeoning with bare hands or improvised weapons such as a crowbar, and he is not believed to have ever used a gun in a killing. He was not carrying a gun in any of his many arrests. (As well as being released for lack of evidence, he escaped from prison at least twice).

This is the cop who supposedly seized the weapon.

This is the cop who supposedly seized the weapon.

This peculiar little gun may be of interest to a crime museum, or to a Bundy groupie.

Bundy groupies? Yes, they’re a thing. One of them, Carol Ann Brown, so reveled in her fandom that she corresponded with and ultimately married the creep, having his kid by conjugal visit before he went to Old Sparky. As sick as it sounds, almost every serial killer has women who write him in prison and fall in love with him.

But is that as sick as a society that lets a Ted Bundy procreate in the first place?

Update

Apparently the groupie thing is well-documented, as well as commonly obeserved. (“Chicks dig jerks,” and who’s a bigger jerk that a serial killer, rapist, and necrophiliac?) It even is a named disorder: hybristophilia. Bundy’s fan mail peaked at 200 letters a day.

Knife. Camera. Action!

Presented for your edification, the first knife handling lesson.

Object of lesson: do not do this with a knife.

This knuckleheaded kid did this to himself a few days ago, and he was due for surgery Friday. Presurgical situation was no sensation in his right pinkie finger beyond the proximal interphalangeal joint (second joint from the tip), and little motor control of the finger. (He had less serious wounds to the proximal section of the ring finger and to the palm).

Apparently a lot of people follow this young man, Lance Stewart, and enjoy their frequent (daily?) slices of his well-heeled if rudderless life. He likes knives, so his fans send him knives (them that has, gets). He’s deuced lucky to still have fingers.

If you replay the video, you can hear the dull thwack of knife meeting flesh and bone. In this, it probably helps that he did this with the mall-shop decorations he did, and not with, say, a pair of quality katanas or even British GI kukris.

His YouTube style is, uh, not for everyone. Hey, it takes all kinds to make a world, and he did put it out there for all of us to see, and perhaps someone will learn from it (even if it’s a lesson most of us who’ve worked professionally with knives would never have needed).

Note that the video appears to have a different splash screen than it had yesterday (then, it was his moment of anguished screaming), so we don’t know if he’s edited the video, but in the version we watched, the knife error comes up within the first 15-20 seconds, but do keep watching for the fainting at 0:55 or so, not to mention the wailing, the gnashing of teeth, and the lamentations of the women.

At one point, someone chastises his friend for keeping filming through the whole thing, and the friend points out that Lance wanted him to. We’re one day closer to the world depicted in Idiocracy, and it seems that the TV show featured there could be a reality any day. At least on YouTube.

Despite his failure to engage forebrain before dual-wielding mall-ninja machetes, Lance seems like a personable kid, and we wish him a complete recovery from his injury.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have AA Guns

North Korean leader Kim Jong Un attends the Supreme People's Assembly in PyongyangWell, what better poster child for outlawry than this guy?

Ri Yong Jin, a senior official at the education ministry, was sentenced to death after he fell asleep in a meeting being addressed by Kim. 

After accidentally dozing off, Ri was taken into custody and interrogated where security agents found evidence of his disloyalty and disrespect towards Kim.

But where’s the joy in being executed alone? So Ri had his Ranger buddy with him at his appointed rendezvous with eternity:

According to South Korean newspaper Joongang Ilbo, Hwang Min, a former agriculture minister was also sentenced to death. 

Hwang’s crime, according to the South Korean media, was to have developed a number of ideas to improve agricultural production.

These ideas were seen by the regime as an attempt to undermine Kim.

No wonder the Norks are starving.  But the really North Korean twist is the way Ri and Hwang met the Maker their entire nation doesn’t believe in:

The JoongAng Ilbo said the two men were executed by anti-aircraft gun at a military academy in Pyongyang.

Welcome to Norkland, where “You’re Fired!” really has an echo.

Kim Jong Un and Cannon

(Yeah, we know that gun’s a long-range artillery piece, not an AA gun. We figure we did OK finding a shot of Baby Huey here with a gun. And anyway, he’ll probably use this next, if it’s real and not a Potemkin prop. -Ed).