Category Archives: Lord Love a Duck

Swiss Family Bubba

These nightmares were found on Reddit, in /r/guns, a good hunting ground for Bubba and all his works. The worksmanship on these is rather good, which we attribute to the whole Swiss thing; on the other hand, the concepts are purest inbred Bubba.

To start with, let’s have a Martini with a long-eye-relief scope. Apparently the Swiss immediate action drill for TEOTWAWKI is “grab Martini, go inna woods mountains“. Somewhere, an SKS breathes a sigh of relief:

Swiss Bubba Martini

Here’s the story behind these, uh, unusual pieces:

So the story goes that this guy had thousands of guns inside a bunker in his house. He was very keen of modifying the guns, mostly adding pistol grips, suppressors and other modern sights.

Unfortunately he died, and supposedly his son inherited the collection which he’s been slowly selling. He even had a couple of K31s with pistol grips, but he sold those. Sometimes you see some nice rare stuff that he tries to sell, but the problem is knowing if those were modified in any way.

The best is probably this pistol vetterli! I also find that K11 with a Stgw 57 magazine interesting, who wouldn’t want a K11 with a 20 shot capacity?

It’s a nice example of bubba transcending borders and nationality.

IF he says so. They’re available at this link, for those in der Schweiz or able to negotiate the import-export maze.

Here’s another:

Swiss Bubba SBR

Ow. Its purpose is unknown, as the creator has apparently yodeled his last, and family members have been trying (for a while) to shift some of these unique modified firearms.

They probably need to be aiming closer to “parts value.” Here’s a “trench mag” adapted from a SIG auto rifle.

Swiss Bubba TActical

With the ever popular pistol scope forward of the action — not so far forward you can load the mag with anything but single rounds.

Finally, there’s a Swiss take at the Obrez concept.

Swiss Bubba Obrez

Honestly, we’ll stop now. For anyone traumatized, counsellors are standing by.


A Hole in the Head

Today, trepanation advocates say that making a hole in your head increases blood flow to the brain and cognitive function. They make a case similar to the one made by users of controlled drugs.

hole in the head 2

To which we say, “You first, thanks.”

But archaeological examination of Bronze Age (~6,000 years old) burial sites by German and  Russian scientists suggests that the practice may have been widespread in the region, in some now-forgotten culture.

location of trepanation burials

The Daily Mail:

Previous studies have shown trepanations were used to relive pressure on the side of the head near fractures.

It is impossible to tell whether the surgery was intended to treat persistent headaches or epilepsy, for example, or mental health problems, though.

Maria Mednikova of the Russian Academy of Sciences, who was not involved in the study, agreed the skulls likely show ritual trepanation was used.

The practice of drilling holes in people’s skulls may have been a rite of passage for individuals taking on important social roles.

But she added: ‘We don’t know the myths and religions of tribes that lived there 6,000 years ago.’

Dr Gresky added that many of the people were buried according to special customs, suggesting they were of high social status.

via Holes found in ancient SKULLS were part of a mysterious Russian ritual among the upper classes 6,000 years ago – and 11 of the 13 ‘patients’ survived the ordeal | Daily Mail Online.

Perhaps the culture is forgotten because they drilled holes in they freakin’ heads. Naw, that can’t be it.

At least some of the ventilated heads’ owners lived for at least some years after the cranial excavations, as the skull wounds show signs of healing.

There’s a little more information at Science News. Unfortunately the paper itself, at the American Journal of Physical Anthropology, is paywalled. They want us to pay $38 for the article.

What, do they think we have a hole in the head?

Country Drowns in Drugs & Guns from Mexican Cartels

mexican_drug_moneyThey were already shipping in drugs by the container load: cocaine, methamphetamine. And they’ve tied into local organized crime gangs. Now, they’re responding to a gun control jurisdiction by throwing a few pounds of pistols, rifles and automatic weapons atop their lucrative drug cargoes, and presto: the cartels have a new profit center. Meanwhile, violence escalates in the country, driven by the supply of these arms directly to violent criminals.

australia-flag-324Oh, one thing. We should probably mention that “the country” is Australia. Where guns (at least semi-auto and pump long guns) are already outlawed. (And they’re aching to ban lever-actions, too, perhaps after watching Ned Kelly over and over again).

According to Australia’s Daily Telegraph (Google Search here gets you in, if you’re not a subscriber)

The violent cartels have made Australia their new prime target and are selling illicit drugs to bikies, Middle Eastern organised crime and Asian gangs with added sweeteners such as handguns, as they attempt to saturate the market with their products, according to a report by the University of Canberra.

The Australian Federal Police yesterday confirmed the Mexican scourge was increasing because “the price they can obtain is significantly higher than that of other markets”.

The TG quoted the splendidly hyphenated Canberra professor, Dr Althea McCarthy-Jones (heareafter DAMC-J to save time), as saying:

Their presence threatens to not only increase the supply of illicit drugs in Australia but encourage turf wars, increase the amount of guns in the country, tax border security resources and threaten the stability and good governance of South Pacific transit spots.

They have already established linkages in the Asia-Pacific and are attempting to expand these with a particular focus on penetrating the Australian market.

Why Australia, the antipodean paradise? Money.

A kilogram of cocaine in Australia can fetch up to $350,000, while the same amount of the illicit drug will make $118,000 in the United Kingdom and just $73,000 in the United States. Methamphetamine seizures and parcel post trafficking, with Mexican origins, have increased significantly in the past three years, according to the [Australian Federal Police].

And, while the Australian coppers don’t know how much they’re missing, they do know how much they’re seizing, and how many mooks they’re charging with importation (thrice the numbers in 2006):

Drug importation offences in NSW have increased by 10.7 per cent each year for the past 10 years, according to the NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research. Last year more than 58,000 charges for drug importation were handed out by police. In 2006 just 21,512 charges were filed.

Has any of you seen an investment with 11% year-on-year growth in recent years? (Well, gun business in the Obama years, perhaps).

And they know where it’s coming from. It’s hecho en Mexico, according to an AFP spox:

The chemical signatures of recent seizures suggest that a significant amount of methamphetamine coming into Australia may originate in Mexico, though it may appear to come from transhipment points in other countries.

Drugs, now with bundled guns.

This was eminently predictable. The Sydney Morning Herald noted in 2014 that drug cartels were aiming at OZ, because there was vast profit in it. Judy Lind of the Australian Crime Commission (which is presumably something to do with fighting crime, and not organizing it) had this to say:

Australians, for whatever reason, are prepared to pay a high price for illicit drugs, probably because they can. Australia is a wealthy country.

And in the last four or five years, international drug cartels cottoned on to that, they are prepared to try and ship products from South America and other countries to try and get it into the Australian market.

Perhaps they didn’t listen to her because she had a simple name. Maybe they will pay attention to DAMC-J.

And the British Daily Mail had a story last year about MS-13, a violent El Salvadoran/American street gang, shipping dope to OZ. The Mail’s down-under correspondent helpfully explains:

S-13 refers to the Mara Salvatrucha crime syndicate, which has been implicated in murder, torture, drugs, money laundering and rape since the early 1980s.

Actually, LE sources tell us it’s, “rape, murder, torture, drugs, money laundering and rape.” They say “rape” twice. (They like rape).

Again, the Mail’s quoted experts emphasized the rich nature of the market under the Southern Cross:

What is undeniable is Australia’s lucrative drugs market has attracted the attention of some of the most notorious crime gangs in the world.

Already the operations of the equally fierce Sinaloa cartel have been exposed with the arrest of two Mexican nationals last year over a massive ice haul.

They were believed to have links to the international drug trafficking and organised crime syndicate run by escapee Joaquin ‘El Chapo’ Guzman.

You may remember the Sinaloa Cartel. They’re the ones that ATF senior managers worked hand-in-glove with in the hopes of creating more murders, and a call for gun control; an objective that backfired on ATF when the guns they supplied to the Sinaloa Cartel were used to murder Federal agents from other agencies. (However, none of the ATF accessories to these murders were charged, or even disciplined. A badge is a patent of nobility).

‘Recently, we have seen the emergence of Mexican cartel activity within Australia,’ said Chris Dawson, Chief Executive Officer of the Australian Crime Commission.

‘In July (2014), the Australian Crime Commission was involved in the arrest of two men allegedly linked to a Mexican drug cartel.’

There’s that Crime Commission again.

In that bust, up to 30 kilograms of crystal methamphetamine was seized, with a street value of more than $30 million.

‘Transnational crime groups, including those based in Mexico, consider Australia an option for importation and distribution of illicit drugs and precursor chemicals because the price they can obtain is significantly higher than that on Mexican and US streets,’ Mr Dawson .

The typical wholesale price per kilogram of cocaine in Colombia is AUD$2,500.

In Mexico it is worth $13,500 per kilogram, and if the same cocaine gets to the US it is worth up to AUD$35,000.

‘But if it makes its way into Australia it is worth $250,000,’ he said.

Markets find their own level. Even Singapore has failed to keep drugs out, and they hang people.

The Army Didn’t Celebrate Rape Month Alone

We’ve been having a jolly old time bagging on the Army for its pathetic display during Sexual Assault Awareness Month, or, in the interests of brevity and clarity, Rape Month. But the sad fact is that the Army is not alone in this particular loopiness.

Behold, the US Air Force Rape Month poster:

Air Force Rape Month poster

About the only difference between the Air Force Social Justice Warriors’ Rape Month cadre and the Army’s is the pattern of their stupid day-glo camouflage uniforms, and their acronym: the USAF calls SHARP “SAPR,” but it’s basically the same the whine in a blue bottle.

We learned this at the John Q. Public blog, which in the course of a comprehensive and worthwhile essay dismantles the Air Force’s pathetic program and lays it out on the ramp for everyone to inspect. It’s pretty ugly to look at, too:

By letting SAPR run the entire conversation, the Air Force has imported the “illiberal liberality” resident in some corners of the social justice movement into its service culture, corrupting teamwork and dissolving the bonds of communication and esprit required to fight and win wars.

Sexual assault a violent crime that deserves a serious law enforcement approach. More investigators, more and better qualified prosecutors, more and better qualified victim counselors and advocates, and better legal education for commanders would be promising policy ideas for addressing this issue.

Instead, the Air Force has adopted an institutional attitude criminalizing and condemning any conduct, real, alleged, or (mostly) hypothetical, carrying even the faintest whiff of sexual impropriety. The results are absurd and pervasive, from confused and poisoned juries who equate fraternization with rape to overzealous and politically jaundiced prosecutors and convening authorities to hog-tied commanders who perceive no meaningful latitude when it comes to deciding whether and how severely to respond to sex-themed allegations of any kind.

John Q. identifies three fundamental sins of the Air Force approach (which is the Army approach with bluer acronyms, is all): issue confusion; constant browbeating; and gimmickry. HE posts this poster, which originated at RAF Lakenheath, as an example of gimmickry, and notes:

After inspiring an avalanche of critical (and in some cases vitriolic) comments reflecting the powder keg this issue has become, it was taken down by 48th Fighter Wing commander Col. Rob Novotny. To his credit, Novotny conceded that the original post missed the mark … but he and his colleagues have a lot of work to do in cultivating a climate where addressing sexual assault doesn’t devolve into a series of weird episodes of social science propaganda theater.

In times of budget restriction, it’s somewhat shameful that we as a nation waste money on such off-mission fripperies as the entire bureaucracies that drive these campaigns. Not a single member of those elements is making a perceptible contribution to national defense — instead, they’re actively undermining it.

Do Read The Whole Thing™ at JQP. It’s kind of depressing to see that the Air Force, which once was unique among the services in valuing its enlisted personnel, has gone as far off the deep end as the Army has on this issue.

Sexual assault is, frankly, about as easy a leadership problem as there is. It’s a crime and the appropriate level of toleration in the ranks for crime is zero. It’s only become such a gray area because the Social Justice Warriors among us want to define everything as assault, if it bruises their gossamer and inconstant feels.

Rape Month. It’s really a thing. And how long before it’s too big a thing to be contained in a mere month, which is, of course, a worthless concept anyway, having been defined by some dead white males a long time before Social Justice Year Zero.

Priorities, Army Style; or Damn, We Missed Rape Month

question markWhat a fine bunch of Army Leadership we have these days!

Here is what the Army thought were the most important events for the just-concluded Month of April, 2016.

Sexual Assault Prevention & Awareness Month: Visit SHARP (#SHARP)

Volunteer Appreciation Month (#Volunteer)

Month of the Military Child: Visit Army Families (#MOMC #MilitaryFamilies)

April 5: Gold Star Spouse’s Day (#GoldStar #Spouses #GoldStarPins)

April 22: Earth Day (#EarthDay)

April 23: Army Reserve’s 108th Birthday(Tag and @USArmyReserve on Twitter)

Jeez, the month ended and we didn’t even know it was Sexual Assault Prevention & Awareness Month, or, stripped of Alinskyite cant and jargon, Rape Month.

Millions for #SocialJustice, not one cent for training ammo. That’s our Army… concentrating on the important stuff, like painting all the tan vehicles green, because it’s never going back to the Mideast again (good luck with that). Instead, it’s going to fight the “inner jihad” of restraining its men from raping its women for another year, until the next Rape Month. (We’re not sure which sex this assumption demeans more: the men who are all seen as horny, slavering ids, or the women who are all seen as helpless children. Neither stereotype stands up to exposure to real soldiers of either sex, but the SJWs sure have a grip on the Pentagon with this bizarre rape cult).

And here were their key dates for this month, May.

National Asian Pacific Heritage Month

Military Spouse Appreciation Day

National Day of Prayer

May 30: Memorial Day

Notice anything missing?

Update: since we looked at that, they added to the list. In now looks like this:

May 2016

National Asian Pacific Heritage Month (#AsianAmericanHeritageMonth)

May 1- 8: Days of Remembrance for Victims of the Holocaust

May 5: National Day of Prayer (Use #OCCHSOCIAL and tag @USArmy in tweets)

May 6: Military Spouse Appreciation Day (#MilSpouseAppreciation )

May 8: Mother’s Day (#MothersDay)

May 30: Memorial Day (#MyMemorialDay)

A few things that happened in April, that the Army’s relentlessly racist diversity beancounters either don’t think are important, or (more likely) that their modern, shallow college educations focused on the class/race/sex obsessions of their perverted professors never taught them about, include:

  • (19th) the battles of Lexington and Concord.
  • The end of the Civil War with Lee’s surrender at Appomattox (9th), but also…
  • …the start of the CivilWar with the rebel bombardment of Fort Sumter (12th).

We think our list rewards study and remembrance more positively and profoundly. But hey, we don’t run the Army.

Events occurring in May? V-E Day comes to mind. Not that today’s PC Army had anything to do with that. 

Coming soon: June is Tranny Hooker Appreciation Month! Coming to a neon-lit hotel strip outside an Army base near you.


At least one Fort Bragg soldier seems to have taken The Spirit of Rape Month to heart.

Johnathan Simpson, 26, of Moonstone Court, was charged with first-degree rape, first-degree kidnapping and sexual battery, Fayetteville police said in a statement. Simpson allegedly committed the assault on April 25.

Well, he’s innocent until proven guilty, yadda yadda. Rumor control says the rape-ee was a guy.

Don’t Bring a Gun to a Dogfight

043016- Frankie, a five-year-old Belgian Malinois police dog, helped apprehend a man wanted in Springfield for a hit-and-run. (State police photo) ---------- Forwarded message ----------

043016- Frankie, a five-year-old Belgian Malinois police dog, helped apprehend a man wanted in Springfield for a hit-and-run. (State police photo)
———- Forwarded message ———-

Final score: Frankie 1, Mohammed 0. Mohammed, a career violent criminal and illegal alien who has not been deported because of the Administration’s executive-ordered amnesty for criminal aliens, drew down on Mass State Trooper David Stucenski and Stucenski’s K9, Frankie. Mohammed got one shot off, and before Stucenski could punch Mo’s ticket, Frankie was on him like, well, like a high-energy Belgian Malinois on a felon.

Ever wonder why Mohammedans believe that dogs are unclean?

Mohammed Fofanah Jr., 35, of Hartford, who police say is in the country illegally and has been previously charged with a felony in Connecticut, was wanted for hitting three cars on Interstate 91 south about 12:15 a.m. yesterday when he allegedly fired a single shot from his .357 Magnum at trooper David Stucenski and his canine partner, Frankie, after ditching his damaged vehicle and refusing to surrender.

Neither Stucenski nor the dog was hit, police say.

via Man held for firing at trooper, K-9 | Boston Herald.

Well, it wasn’t for lack of trying. Do we know anything else about Mo? Turns out, we do.

Fofanah — who was wearing an electronic monitoring ankle bracelet at the time of his arrest — is from Sierra Leone and had been charged with a previous felony in Connecticut, Procopio said. He may now be subject to deportation. Upon his 
release from the hospital, Fofanah was transported to sheriff’s lockup and held without bail, Procopio said.

Wait, what? Hospital? Why was he in hospital? Please, tell us that Frankie had his way with ‘im!

After being subdued by Frankie, who jarred the weapon from his hand, Fofanah was placed under arrest and rushed by ambulance to nearby Baystate Medical Center to receive treatment for bite wounds, state police said.

Really, there’s only one possible response to that: GOOD DOG.

Breaking: Another Chance for Martland

SFC Charles MartlandSFC Charles Martland, the Special Forces NCO who is being railroaded out of the Army for stopping an Afghan pedophile from continuing to inflict bacha bazi on a young slave boy, has been granted a reprieve to allow him to file another appeal. This news was released in a Friday night data dump, and some of the media are reporting as if Martland has won. According to SF soldiers who have seen the Army ruling, it’s just a temporary delay to let things blow over while a doomed appeal circulates, before pro-pedophile Pentagon personnel people get what they want.

While it’s impossible to put anything past the current leadership structure, the Fox News story indicated that the toxic “Army Values” determination has been removed from Martland’s records:

An Army spokesman said Thursday that Martland’s status has been changed, allowing him to stay in the Army in a statement to Fox News.

“In SFC Martland’s case, the Army Board for Correction of Military Records determination modified a portion of one of SFC Martland’s evaluation reports and removed him from the QMP list, which will allow him to remain in the Army,” said Lt. Col. Jerry Pionk.

The final outcome is unknowable at the moment.

The history of the case is this: Martland got QMP’d out (that is, dropped by a reduction in force mechanism known by the Orwellian name “Qualitative Management Program”) because of a bad NCO Evaluation Report. The bad NCOER, in turn, came about because he objected to the Afghan sacrament of buggery (now on its way to full sacramental status in the Pentagon, as well). You would think that they’d give a medal to a guy who saved a kid from sex slavery, but not Martland: what they want to give him is two in the hat. And the whole NCOER thing is a uniformed bureaucrat’s way of doing it in such a way that there are no prints on the murder weapon. “Oh, no, we didn’t whack him; it was all just automatic after that old meanie gave him the toxic NCOER.”

You would think that speeches like this stemwinder from a Virginia Delegate Nick Freitas would make a difference:

You’d be wrong. In the mixed-up, tossed-up, never-come-down world of Army Values, buggery trumps integrity every time.

And the Great Buggernaut rolled on. But perhaps it will not roll over Charles Martland. Not yet..


This Ain’t Hell covered Martland’s situation based on the Fox News story linked above. Hondo and Jonn’s and his commenters appear to be more confident than we are, that this reversal is the real thing and Martland’s troubles are over, for now.

Administrative Note

We’ll be late with tonight’s Friday Tour d’Horizon. Meatworld pressures are upon us, everything from cat-sitting an ailing furball to trying to buy property to a non-life-threatening but vexatiously painful medical problem. Yes, that sounds like a lot of sniveling, because it is. There is a post set for 0600 tomorrow and we hope to catch up then, and backfill the missing piece. We regret the delay — Ed.

Didn’t Foom Right The First Time. Or the Second. Or Third….

Two apartment towers in Seaforth near Liverpool were scheduled to be demolished by explosives at 1000 BST Sunday, 24 April. Churchill House and Montgomery House were identical 15-story, 58-unit buildings and the demolitionist was a professional firm, J. Bryan (Victoria) Ltd of Widnes, England.

At the appointed hour the charges went off in sequence… and nothing else happened.

The BBC has the best video of this at this linked story (we couldn’t figure out how to embed it…Britons are certainly getting complexity for their TV taxes, if nothing else).

Engineers checked the buildings and found them, structurally, still sound.

Two hours later, down came Churchill House, unbidden. So much for engineers!

A second attempt to blow Montgomery House on Monday also failed. A third attempt produced some serious structural damage, and one corner of the building came down, the rest of it still stood. We can imagine the shade of Monty, arms akimbo, laughing at the would-be demolitionists. Montgomery, of all generals, would have ensured the operation had been properly prepared for.

It makes one wonder whether demolitions as a practice is quite as scientific as its exponents try to make it sound. We do recall our 12Bs / 18Cs always muttering things that resembled Druidic incantations more than scientific calculations, and always including a factor P (for “Plenty.”) Not to get all up in the business of J. Bryan (Victoria) Ltd. but we’d take odds that their demolitionist is not a graduate of an Armed Forces demo school in which the fundamentality of the foundational P Factor is stressed.

The buildings were erected around 1960 (as seems obvious from the names; if they put them up now, they’d be named for pop singers, legendary sheikhs or imams, or maybe the Kray brothers). That means that entropy was already bringing them down day by day, without any needed assist from J. Bryan or Islamic terrorists. It has to have the would-be destroyers a bit red in the face.

Still, our prediction is that by the time you read this, J. Bryan and company will have gone back to the books and redone the demo, this time with the P factor prominent in their calculations.

A Pathetic Fake on GunBroker

We’ve seen some blatant fakes, but this one retires the trophy.

fake nazi holster

The auction title: “Nazi Scorpion VZ 61 Holster and Magazine Pouch.” Do you see the problem yet? Here’s the reverse of the holster and pouch:

fake nazi holster reverse

And here’s the proof of its Nazi bona fides, a gen-you-wine Waffenamt marking!

fake holster waffenamt 2

And here’s another Waffenamt. That Hitler SWAT sticker is way, way clearer on this one.

fake holster waffenamt 1

Have you figured out the problem yet?

The holster and pouch are not for any weapon the Nazis would, or could, have used. They are for the Czech Vz61 Škorpion submachine gun / personal defense weapon, a .32 ACP hybrid pistol/SMG used by some military elements but mostly by internal security elements of the Ministry of the Interior.

While some Czech guns were made and used by Nazis during the Nazi occupation of Czechoslovakia 1938-45, the Nazis left after that (as did, at bayonet point, those ethnic Germans who had invited them in); with the exception of a few war criminals in pokey and a quantity of Nazis-made-good in the graveyards. So you will not find authentic Waffenamt markings on anything made after 1945.

(But you can, and these images suggest someone did, find not-so-authentic Waffenamt stamps on eBay).

The abbreviation Vz stands for the Czech (and Slovak, and a couple other Slavic languages) word Vzor, meaning, “model,” as in, “Model of –“, and of course, the Vz refers to a year.

Anyone daring enough to make a guess as to when a firearm called Vz 61 was adopted?

Next question, is 61 > 45? We may be dealing with someone who is not only a faker, but also suffering from bitchy resting face pre-terminal innumeracy.

Let’s look inside the holster and pouch and see what we can learn there. Hey, there’s a stamp inside the holster flap!

fake holster pouch dates 3

In this stamp, K6 is a manufacturer code, the crossed swords are a Czechoslovak Army marking, and 66 is the year of manufacture.

See, there was this one Nazi who refused to believe the war was over, and hid in the mountains… making holsters.

Next up, the marking inside the pouch for the Škorpion’s spare mags.

fake holster pouch dates 1 fake holster pouch dates 2

So to recap: the gun belonging in this holster was designed in 1961, the mag pouch was made in 1965, and the holster itself in 1966.

But the leatherwares somehow acquired marks from the Waffenamt, an inspectorate defunct for 16, 20, and 21 years respectively at the time. While simultaneously bearing the marks of the postwar Czechoslovak People’s Army.

Last interesting facts: He has this priced a lot higher than a generic Škorpion holster; and, a lot of the seller’s other sales are claimed Nazi stuff, mixed in with admitted replicas.

Don’t take any wooden nickels — or time-traveling Nazi holsters for future guns.

Gun, Copper, Thief

It’s kind of like a game of rock paper scissors, with real-life consequences:

Gun arms cop.
Cop stops thief.
Thief steals gun.

This M16A1, stolen in 2013 from the Philadelphia Police Department (or sold by a crooked cop — the means of its departure is not entirely clear, and it doesn’t seem to have been investigated very hard), remains in criminal hands three years later.

Phillys Missing M16A1

Whistling past the graveyard, neither the FBI nor the ATF makes an effort to collect national statistics on stolen police guns.

This story, from the Philadelphia Inquirer, was occasioned by the critical wounding of Philadelphia patrolman Jesse Hartnett by Islamic terrorist and ISIL volunteer Abdul Shaheed, congregant of the Masjid Mujahideen on S. 60th Street in West Philadelphia, whom the ostriches of the press insist on calling by his prehomicidal name Edward Archer. (Shaheed is the Arabic word for martyr. Mujahideen is the Arabic term for holy warriors — or terrorists, in Islam it’s the same thing).

In the instant story, reporter Stephanie Farr pulls out some recent data, by her own efforts, that the Feds are scrupulously collecting, not. 

  • The Philadelphia PD and its 6100 officers have lost 32 issued firearms in the last five years to theft or loss. (If there’s any attempt to track officers’ personally owned firearms, it’s not mentioned).
  • 9 have been recovered, including Abdul Shaheed’s Glock, which was reported stolen in 2013.
  • LAPD’s 9800 officers have lost 7 firearms in the same period, all to theft.
  • The embattled Baltimore PD’s 2400 officers have lost 7 firearms in the same period, all to theft.
  • Chicago’s 12,000 officers have filed 77 theft and loss reports.

These numbers seem suspect to us, because they appear to be the number of theft and loss incidents, and it seems likely that the number of guns lost is higher. Still, this table reveals some interesting variations. Feel free to check our math.

Police Firearms Lost to Theft

PD Sworn Officers

Thefts (if known) Thefts Per/1000 officers Losses (if known) Losses Per/1000 officers Total Thefts and Losses

Total Per/1000 officers

















Los Angeles
















The original data were in Farr’s article, we just extended her reporting by tabularizing the data and adding the rates for a useful comparison.

Question: Why such stark differences in loss and theft rate? Or, to put it another way, what’s the difference between what LA is doing and the other major urban PDs? Bear in mind that the difference might just be reporting categories or other statistical gamesmanship, something intrinsic to police management in these CompStat days.

All these cities, of course, practice fairly hardcore gun control, making thefts from police an appealing logistical pathway for would-be terrorists like Shaheed seeking arms. One is reminded the Boston Marathon bombers Dzhokar “Flashbang” Tsarnaev and his brother Tamerlan “Speedbump” Tsarnaev murdered MIT Police Officer Sean Collier to try to steal his service pistol. (A second cop, Boston PD’s DJ Simmons, died a year later from injuries received in  the Watertown shootout, something the press usually forgets in their crush on the surviving murderer).

In totalitarian states, theft from the authorities and the euphemistically named “battlefield recovery” have been instrumental in arming resistance groups, also. (Who are, from the viewpoint of the authorities, naturally, criminals). One set of data that has never been systematized is the photographs of European resistance movements in World War II, but certainly the resisters are usually seen with quantities of Nazi as well as prewar and allied-airdropped arms.

Police are not enthusiastic about more rigid control measures on department firearms, or to be held responsible for losing them, administratively speaking. They certainly feel personal responsibility: retired ATF officer Jay Wachtel admitted to Farr that his own service pistol was stolen from him and was missing for years.

I was on pins and needles for three years because I was afraid it would be used in a homicide. When it got recovered, I just had this huge sense of relief.

It seems to be classified in the Homer Simpson File of Life: “Stuff that just happens.” Jim Burch of the Police Foundation thinks that cops shouldn’t be held responsible for their stolen guns:

Preventing the theft of a firearm can be very difficult, particularly when your car and daily attire or uniform essentially advertises to the criminal element that firearms are likely present in your home

So, Burch believes, cops should get a bye on thefts, although he concedes that they have an issue with losses. In Philadelphia, though, neither seems to have career consequences for a cop.

Philadelphia police would not say how many officers had been disciplined over the issue.


The logical inference of that “refusal to say” is that the number is zero. To put it another way, There is no evidence that careless storage of, careless loss of, or even outright corruption in the unlawful transfer of department or personal firearms is a matter of the least concern to Philadelphia PD managers.

Only now are indictments coming in for crooked Philadelphia cops who were apparently dealing in departmental firearms for years. (It could be worse. In New York, cops exposed for taking bribes to sell pistol permits are still reporting to work and being paid, and only the bribe payer has been charged).

At the time the M16 came up missing, Commissioner Charles H Ramsey cut a bold figure. He made a strong statement.

We will get to the bottom of it one way or another, I guarantee that.

Three years later, all the PD has done is issue that statement. Doesn’t look so strong, does it?

Even with the near-murder of Hartnett,