Category Archives: Lord Love a Duck

TSA: Turpitude Strikes Again

tsa-security-theaterAs we’re prone to say, no one good, decent, moral, ethical, competent or intelligent has ever been employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever. Which is why they’re so often in the news.

They’ve been in the news so much lately, we can’t keep up… but here’s a roundup that hits some of the lowlights.

ITEM: TSA still pushing failed “Behavior Detection” schemes

The TSA no-brain trust is still promoting the Behavioral Detection Officer scheme which has never been evaluated in many attempts, except as a failure. Basically, this is based on the theory that you can take a borderline-retarded TSA drone, give him a few Death by Powerpoint or even online classes, and turn loose a counterterrorist mastermind who can see into the black hearts of travelers.

tsa_turkey_largeIn practice, of course, it just give them one more reason to hassle random people, which task they take up with relish. As the Geico ads say, that’s what they do.

We’ll pull a quote from James Bovard in USA Today on 8 Jun 15:

Thousands of TSA agents continue roaming airports as part of the Screening of Passengers by Observation Techniques (SPOT) program, conducting “chat-downs” and ferreting out “micro-expressions” that signal trouble. TSA’s secret checklist of dangerous traveler traits, which recently leaked out, includes yawning, throat clearing, “wringing of hands,” “widely open staring eyes,” and gazing down. The most ludicrous warning sign is “excessive complaints about the screening process” — probably not the first trick terrorist groups teach would-be suicide bombers. No wonder that reports by the Inspector General and Government Accountability Office found that the TSA’s behavior detection program is ineffective and a waste of tax dollars.

These same proven-ineffective techniques are used by the so-called VIPER (Vanquish, Intimidate, Penetrate, Ejaculate, and Run) teams.

ITEM: As Bad as the Public Reports Are, the Classified Ones Are Worse

That’s according to a guy who gets them, Senator Ben Sasse, R-KS, in USA Today:

Here is what keeps me up at night: The publicly available facts are disturbing, but the classified details are even worse. Millions of families will soon fly to summer vacations, but if moms knew what members of Congress have learned behind closed doors, they would march on Washington demanding an urgent, top-to-bottom reevaluation of airport security.

How about this? Since Federalizing airport security was never about anything but easy, overpaid jobs for the mentally and morally handicapped, and putting on a display of Security Theater, how about disbanding the TSA and sending its employees back to their group homes and halfway houses?

ITEM: Armed TSA VIPER team invades airshow

What’s worse than TSA droids standing between you and the jet home? How about TSA agents tripping around randomly, with guns? Seen at the Reading, Pennsylvania warbird show last weekend:



Yes, the shirts say “DHS” on them. If you were an armed TSA agent, you’d be too embarrassed to wear a shirt that said TSA, too. But these folks are indeed TSA. (Supposedly, this VIPER team was drawn in part from the air marshals, so at least they’re not a very great hazard to the public. On the other hand, what’s up with putting the Secret Squirrel air marshals in pseudo-cop garb and have them throw their weight stroll around a public gathering?).

Another group of TSA mouthbreathers were dressed in all tactical tommy togs, including assault armor, sporting tactical beards, and describing themselves to adoring Civil Air Patrol cadets as “Homeland Security operators.” Clue-gram for those clowns, not the two in the picture: Hey, there’s a recruiting office in the Post Office downtown, you pathetic poseurs.

Fortunately, no bombs were found at the show, except for dummies in the bomb bays and under the wings of septuagenarian warplanes. And the TSA was dissuaded from blowing them in place. Of course, given the TSA’s record of 3-and-67 on finding dummy bombs in their actual bomb scanners, who’s to say there were none to be found? We’re not ready to give this Security Theater credit for the peaceful conduct of the show.

ITEM: James Bovard, USA Today: No excuses to continue the groping

Or the stealing

Though Transportation Secretary Norman Mineta promised that TSA would hire “the best and the brightest,” TSA was soon busy issuing blanket denials in response to employee abuses. In 2004, I wrote a New York Times op-ed detailing arrests of TSA agents around the nation for looting travelers’ luggage. At the time the piece came out, the TSA was adamant that baggage thefts by its agents were a minor, localized problem. A few months later, TSA announced a de facto nationwide class action settlement for 15,000 passengers who had formally complained of being pilfered by TSA agents. More than 400 TSA agents have been fired for stealing from travelers.

B1_TSA_deedum_AH1Or the general incompetence:

In its early days, TSA promised “no weapons, no waiting.” But the agency has long since claimed a prerogative to severely disrupt travelers’ schedules with unpredictable long lines. No one knows how many millions missed flights TSA has caused.

The Department of Homeland Security admitted in 2011 congressional testimony that “the large majority of travelers pose no security risks.” TSA cannot admit this self-evident truth without also conceding that it is pointlessly abusing and delaying millions of travelers every day. Instead, TSA continues a “security theater” routine that is far more effective at subjugating Americans than protecting them.

ITEM: Ex-director John Pistole Praises perverted payroll patriots

In  a dreary, impassioned column in USA Today, Pistole defends and even lauds the Government’s most incompetent work force:

I for one will continue to thank the men and women of TSA for doing a thankless job.

Well, no one else is doing it. For good reason, mind.

He argues that the agency’s near-complete failure to detect test weapons is the result of the testers, we are not making this up, cheating. Because if there’s one thing you can count on terrorists to do, it’s play fair!

these covert testers have access to the “owner’s manual” of the technology they’re testing. They know the specific detection capabilities and can devise, construct and conceal devices that will likely evade detection. They know the standard operating procedures (SOPs) and can attempt to exploit them. And they know how TSA employees are supposed to respond to possible threat items.

Of course, if you paid any attention to Pistole’s integrity during his TSA stint, you’ve probably already guessed: he’s lying. Talking points similar to those Pistole used were distributed by agency flacks to their various paid mouthpieces, but in fact the penetration testers have been blind to the agency’s countermeasures.

So why is he defending the agency? Easy. He’s paid to do it.

But it’s Washington, So More Domestic Spying Will Fix Things

And tying it in to the failed BDO/SPOT program, bringing us full circle.

DHS secretly videotaping citizens to ‘predict crime’.

That’ll end well!

And if not that, a New Figurehead Will Fix Everything

In this case, Peter Neffenger, a Coast Guard admiral. We’ve already had one Coast Guard Admiral as head of TSA, and Admiral Stone was a complete failure, so we should just take this guy on the theory that doing the same dumb thing will not give us the same dumb result.

TSA nominee shares lawmakers’ concern about airport security – U.S. – Stripes

And Neffenger? He plans to undertake a punitive expedition against airline passengers, telling the committee that travelers need to brace for further “inefficiencies.”

Vice Adm. Peter Neffenger, nominee for TSA chief, likely to face ‘inefficiencies’ – Washington Times

More ‘Inefficiencies’ at TSA Checkpoints, Dennis Hastert Was a Hypocrite, Greek Bailout Talks Hit Yet Another Hurdle: P.M. Links – Hit & Run :

USA Today’s Conclusion:

This pretty much stands on its own:

Unless officials act swiftly, passengers will conclude that the inconvenience is pointless, and terrorists will conclude that it’s easy to smuggle an explosive device aboard a jetliner.

True, and true. But how can “officials act swiftly” to negate two true statements? The last time “officials acted swiftly,” they created this breeding ground for corruption and incompetence. Do we really want them to do that again? Moreover, by immunizing their low-quality hires from all consequences of their own actions, TSA managers — none of them has ever deserved the term, “leader” — have created an organization with an entitlement culture, inured to public contempt and immune to reform.

To mend it, we have to end it, then. The original motto for the perverted payroll patriots of TSA was “Dominate. Intimidate. Control.”  Since then, no one good, decent, moral, ethical, competent or intelligent has ever been employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever. So we say, “Disband. Eliminate. Cancel.”

Another Saga of American Abandonment

Let us redirect your attention from the tale of bugout, betrayal, abandonment, and impending defeat and enslavement that is the lot of those Iraqis and Afghans who stood with us in the last decade. Let us instead consider the betrayal and abandonment of a key US ally in the waning days of the Cold War, when the bleak grip of Marxism as prophesied by Castro and Ortega was closing over several Latin American nations, and most of the rest had barely-better caudillos in uniform.

Soviet- and Cuban-sponsored FMLN propaganda station, 1980s.

Soviet- and Cuban-sponsored FMLN propaganda station, 1980s.

Against these two extremes stood elected President of El Salvador, José Napoléon Duarte, and his Defense Minister, Carlos Antonio Vides, who managed to arrest the “death squad” excesses of the military (which was not winning the war for hearts and minds) at the same time as they crushed the FMLN, to the lasting dismay of the Castros, the KGB, the Liberation Theology pseudo-Christians, and various other supporters.

Human-rights abuses were rampant when Duarte became president in 1984: Political killings by the military or death squads linked to it exceeded 800 per month in 1981, according to a RAND Corp. paper from a decade later. In an infamous attack in 1980 four American churchwomen were raped and murdered by national guard soldiers when Gen. Vides was the guard commander. But two separate investigations—by the U.S. in 1983 and an official Salvadoran “truth commission” established when the civil war ended in 1992—concluded that Mr. Vides played no role in those killings (though the latter report suggests he helped try to cover them up).

Let’s stop for a moment here. While the rape of the women was wrong, all four of them (and the nominally Catholic Liberation Theology orders three of them were associated with, the Maryknoll Ministries and the Ursuline Order) were unlawful combatants in the war, on the side of the Nicaraguan Sandinistas, the Salvadoran FLMN, and the ultimate power in both those movements, the KGB working through the Cuban DGI.

Cuban-armed Salvadoran rebel child conscript.

Cuban-armed Salvadoran rebel child conscript.

These movements, and, no doubt, these women, carried and concealed dispatches, supplies and weapons for the guerrillas, and conducted reconnaissance and espionage on a routine basis. There is no moral difference between servants of Communism and servants of Naziism or any other form of tyranny — by their deeds ye shall know them. We’ll say again, even spies and saboteurs shouldn’t be raped, but spies do not deserve to live. The world is a better place with these four traitors and tools of terrorism dead. While the manner of their death was horrible and the perpetrators should be held to account, you should feel no more sympathy for them than you do for Lord Haw-Haw, or Judas Iscariot, for that matter.

Together Duarte and Gen. Vides dramatically reduced death squad killings, which dropped to 23 a month in 1987, according to an Institute for Foreign Policy Analysis report the following year. U.S. diplomats in El Salvador during that period can attest that Duarte’s key partner in reducing abuses and taming the military was Gen. Vides. Right-wing oligarchs in El Salvador repeatedly approached the army with plans for a coup against Duarte, but Gen. Vides and other loyal senior officers blocked them.

Units like the Atlacatl Battalion were vilified, in part because they did commit excesses, and in part because they were effective against the Communists. The media let Communist atrocities go unreported.

Units like the Atlacatl Battalion were vilified, even when other units were responsible for crimes, because they were effective against the Communists. The media let Communist atrocities go unreported. The unit motto is “For the Fatherland and With God.”

So why, you may ask, is Vides back in the news today?

Mr. Vides moved to the U.S. in 1989 because his safety in El Salvador could not be protected. He has since lived in Florida, and his children and grandchildren are all U.S. citizens.

Two cases, both filed in 1999, brought legal claims against him in American courts. The first was filed by the families of the murdered churchwomen. In 2000 a federal jury ruled that Gen. Vides was not liable for the killings. The second was brought by three people who had fled El Salvador after being tortured during the conflict. In 2002 a federal jury in that case did find Gen. Vides liable, under the theory of “command authority”—that as head of the military, he was ultimately responsible for the actions of nearly 55,000 soldiers and police.

The subtext to these legal actions, that the two diplomats who wrote this Wall Street Journal op-ed so diplomatically leave unmentioned, is that they were carried out as lawfare, by the same far-left interests that still bemoan the defeat of the FMLN and El Salvador’s deliverance from the shackles of slavery.

Those who recall Gen. Vides’s efforts to curb human-rights abuses in the 1980s find that conclusion laughable and unjust. Nevertheless, Mr. Vides handed over hundreds of thousands of dollars of his assets when the judgment went against him. But his accusers also wanted him expelled from the U.S. And now, at age 77, he has been.

An immigration judge ruled on Aug. 16, 2012, that he should be deported under laws allowing such treatment for human-rights abusers. On March 11, 2015, Mr. Vides’s initial appeal was rejected and he was given 30 days to depart. He decided he would leave the U.S. and return to El Salvador while his attorneys appealed the case.

You wonder what happens when you are given a month to depart by an immigration court? In 2015, it depends on what the Obama Administration thinks of you. If they think you’re merely a violent criminal, they will not pursue you — their long-term objective is to amnesty you (an objective they share with their peers in the upper crust of their Republican political opponents). But as it happens, the Obama State Department, and Justice Department, and the Orwellian-named Department of Homeland Security, share the Maryknolls’ love for Castrostan, and wouldn’t let an opportunity to settle scores slide.

And, with the enforcement of immigration laws being abandoned as a point of policy, they happen to have a lot of ICE and CBP special agents hanging around with time on their hands to send a message from the grave of Marxism-Leninism:

But allowing him to take a commercial flight home, where his brother stood ready to meet him, was too dignified for the U.S. government. Two weeks later Mr. Vides was pulled over while driving near his home, arrested, shackled hand and foot, and transported to the immigration jail in Jena, La. His car was left at the side of the road. After days of complaints by his attorneys he was finally taken back to El Salvador on April 8 aboard a special Department of Homeland Security flight at taxpayers’ expense.

With the warning that it may anger you, especially if you’re one of us who worked down South and has had a price put on his head by the Maryknolls’ playmates,  Read The Whole Thing™. If you’re paywalled out, this Google search should give you a working link. The op-ed is titled Allies, Beware: The US Can Be a Fair-Weather Friend. 

And yeah, they open with the case of Ngo Dinh Diem, who was so frustrating to the Kennedy brothers that they had him overthrown (he was also murdered, which they don’t seem to have directed, but certainly didn’t mind). After the murder of Diem, the Republic of Vietnam spent its remaining years in a permanent crisis of legitimacy. They don’t mention such other beneficiaries of American rug-pulling as the Shah of Iran or Lon Nol, but you can bet your citizenship that every small-nation leader whose good will the USA may need some day knows those stories by heart.


The US Institute for Peace has a copy of the findings of the Salvadoran Truth Commission (.pdf). It does not suggest that the American women were raped. It does say that they were murdered, describes the sentences meted out to the murderers (in 1984, during the Duarte/Vides government), and does accuse Vides of participating in a cover-up of the murders (there is evidence for this, but not strong or unrefuted evidence, if we understand the way the report uses its own descriptions of standards of evidence and proof instead of common-law ones… this is close to “a preponderance of evidence” or “more likely than not,” again, if we read it right). It says there is evidence that someone gave the squad that committed the murders the instruction, but does not suggest who this someone was.

There’s an interesting fact that’s not brought out, but emerges from a reading of the report. Only the government side pursued any criminal cases against accused war criminals.


The TSA Excels Again

B1_TSA_deedum_AH1This time has the goods, combining an ABC News report with a remarkable statement from Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson.

No one good, decent, moral, ethical, competent or intelligent has ever been employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever. Which is why nobody is ever surprised by results like this:

Of the 70 tests performed by Department of Homeland Security Red Teams at more than a dozen airports across the country, TSA agents reportedly failed 67 times, ABC News reported.

4.3% success rate. They have one job. And this is how well they do it.

A report from the Inspector General of DHS was sent Monday to the agency’s secretary, Jeh Johnson, who said in a statement he would direct the TSA to take actions to improve security measures in the nation’s airports.

He is directing the same bozos who can’t do the security equivalent of tie their shoes to stop failing. It’s like expecting Moe, Larry and Curly to solve Fermat’s Last Theorem and win a shared Fields Medal: ain’t gonna happen.

“Red Team testing of the aviation security network has been part of TSA’s mission advancement for 13 years,” Johnson said.

And they’re failing at staggering, unimaginable, Child-Services-had-a-love-child-with-the-DMV levels of government incompetence.

To put it another way, more guys got groped by gay TSA gropers in 12 months than test bombs got found. But the same thing happened to both the gay groper and the blind bombseekers: no real consequences1.

“The numbers in these reports never look good out of context, but they are a critical element in the continual evolution of our aviation security. We take these findings very seriously in our continued effort to test, measure and enhance our capabilities and techniques as threats evolve.”

“Out of context?” By the bones of Ctulthu’s tentacles, what context could make a 4.3% success rate on the one job that these incompetroids have “look good”?

If this stumblebum thinks this reflects well on the TSA, imagine the colossal cluster-mating he’s making out of the less incompetent (so far) agencies trapped in his DHS den of density.

“The first step would be for TSA leadership to correct the security procedures at the airports that failed inspection…”

Which, let the records show, they haven’t corrected despite the last 13 years of reports showing that they quite literally find more travelers’ credit cards and watches than they do of the dummy bombs they’re supposed to find.

“… followed by sharing the results with all other airports in the country, Johnson said. Airport security personnel will also receive training to address any vulnerabilities and screening equipment will be retested and reevaluated. Random covert testing will continue.”

After spending a lot of time training various military personnel, from self-motivated and borderline-brilliant elites to truculent, mouth-breathing conscripts, we would never say training is worthless. It does, however, have its limits, and the TSA’s payroll patriots cluster somewhere off the end of the axis the mouth-breathing conscripts were on. The salient aphorism here, is: “You can’t polish a turd.” However, if you’re Jeh Johnson, we supposed you have to pretend to try.

“I have also directed TSA and the Department of Homeland Security Under Secretary for Science and Technology to examine adopting new technologies to address the vulnerabilities identified by the Inspector General’s testing,” Johnson said.

Oh yeah, because more Rapescan machines from Rapescan Ltd. will make up for the fact the operators have the mental agility and logical reasoning of so many battery hens. Or maybe because Jeh knows he has only another 20 months or so and then he needs a soft landing at a contractor selling DHS crap, like Chertoff got.

via TSA misses 95 percent of weapons smuggled through security.

Which is really closer to 95.72, and that rounds to 96 in our math, but then, we don’t expect basic numeracy from reporters, and it’s not like it would kill us to spot the TSA’s Special Olympians the point.


Consequences, sort of.

[Acting Administrator] Melvin Carraway was reassigned to the Office of State and Local Law Enforcement at the Department of Homeland Security headquarters. Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson said Tuesday that the TSA’s acting deputy director, Mark Hatfield, will step in to lead the agency until a new administrator is confirmed.

Don’t worry, bureaucrat fans: Carraway won’t lose any money or prestige or anything, his “punishment” is an office move. And Mark Hatfield? Son of a bribe-taking former Republican Senator from Oregon, he’s never held a real job in his life; even his college degree was provided partly as a bribe; he’s either been a lobbyist selling his connections or a government drone — embedded like a tick in TSA since its earliest days, he instantiates the class of bad, indecent, dishonest, incompetent unintelligent, immoral and unethical TSA stumblebums. He’s the perfect guy to make sure that no one good, decent, honest, competent, intelligent, moral or ethical gets employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever.

But Jeh’s cool with that:

“I continue to have confidence in the TSA workforce,” Johnson said.

Yeah. Great judge of character and skill, that guy Jeh.


  1. The gay guy and his chick spotter got fired, but they don’t even get a negative reference. Exercise for the reader: walk up to a person of the same sex and give him or her a thorough sexual groping. When you get writing privileges at the Big House, write to us and tell us how many years not being in the TSA cost you.
  2. To be completely anally pedantic (in a non-TSA version of “anally”) about it, 3/70 = 0.04285714(…) or about 4.3% success. That’s the product of a bakers’ dozen years of “mission advancement” at TSA. You might have heard us say this before: no one good, decent, honest, competent, intelligent, moral or ethical has ever been employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever.

When Guns are Outlawed, only Outlaws Will Have Silverware

ForkSomebody doesn’t know “stick a fork in her,” is just an expression. People do get testy about chow, especially in gourmand circles, but this is ridiculous:

The Star Press ( ) reports a 45-year-old woman was arrested Sunday night on a preliminary charge of criminal recklessness.

An affidavit says the woman was attending a barbecue in Muncie when she raised the ire of the host’s daughter by “taking the last rib from the kitchen.”

The affidavit says the woman told police that the daughter accused her of “taking all the food,” so she stabbed her in the eye.

Police say the woman maintains she acted in self-defense and that the homeowner’s daughter was brandishing a knife.

via Indiana woman gets fork in eye over last rib.

She didn’t get shot, so whatever Hoosier got forked, it wasn’t Tam.

Q: Is a fork deadly force?

A: IANAL, but it’s gotta be when some jerk sticks it in your jeezly eye. 

Q: Is this self-defense?

A: Well, she’s making that claim, but I don’t think she’s read Andrew Branca’s book.

Q: How rare is this kind of thing?

A: An EMT-P friend says it’s not unusual, over the years he’s seen a few. The patient may or may not lose the eye.

It is unclear whether the weapon was an ordinary dinner fork, a larger serving fork as used by Golden Corral professionals, or a deadly assault barbecue fork with the shoulder thing that goes up. Moms will be Demanding Action for Fork Sense as soon as they eat the next plate of ribs.

The last person who had such a costly rib has to have been Adam.


For more information, this page at the Star-Press has more details. The perp is one Sabrina Davis, 45, and from the build evident in her mugshot, this isn’t the first time she’s eaten all the food at the pigout cookout.

That woman confronted Davis “about taking all the food,” and told officer Amy Kesler that Davis responding by stabbing her in the left eye with a fork she had been using “to take meat from a pan.”

The victim had “at least two small lacerations on her left eyelid,” Kesler wrote, and her eye was “swollen and bloodshot.”

A witness told police the victim “was frustrated that Davis was taking so much food from the house,” and after being wounded in the eye, “grabbed a knife from the counter and was trying to get to Davis.”

However, Davis maintained she was acting in self defense, insisting the other woman was already brandishing the knife when she stabbed her in the eye.

Davis — who remained in the Delaware County jail on Tuesday under a $5,000 bond — confirmed “the dispute was over the last rib in a pan,” Kesler wrote.

This may crush people who believe in the absolute randomness of life, but it seems Ms Davis was already a familiar face in the courts of Muncie. Color us shocked.

What’s the Acronym for Thuggish Simple Airheads?

tsa-security-theaterCan you say TSA? We knew you could. We haven’t beaten on them since they advertised on pizza boxes for future traveler-gropers last month. (What’s next, Thunderbird bottles?)

And in the interests of fairness, we’ll give first point to the TSA. They make the utterly reasonable suggestion that we gun owners out to pull our heads out of the region of our anatomy we’ve been using as a head holster, and stop forgetting we’re carrying guns and breezing into the machines.

In 2005, 660 guns were confiscated nationwide. Last year, the number rose to 2,212 – nearly a four-fold increase.
“I think there’s a personal responsibility for any gun owner, that they ought be aware of the rules, where they can and can’t take it,” McCarthy says.

We can’t really argue with that. TSA 1: Humanity 0.

From here it goes downhill for the gropers.

Yes, They’re Gropers

TSA PervLast month, CBS discovered a gay TSA goon and his female enablers were doing what the TSA has always denied its gropers do, singling out attractive people for a lascivious groping that crossed the line into sexual assault. TSA Denver agent Chris Higgins watched a groping live, and he and higher-ups reviewed others on tape, and the groper and enablers admitted it, but the TSA bosses and Denver Deputy DA Bonnie Benedetti simply fired the perv and one of his lookouts (the other wasn’t punished at all). It’s not even the first time the Denver prosecutor has given a wink-and-a-nod to a TSA sexual assault perp. It’s funny how prosecutors lose interest in pursuing sexual assault when the perv is a fellow payroll patriots, eh?

Across the country other passengers have raised concerns over the years about TSA pat downs. But the recent case uncovered by CBS4 is more problematic for TSA since its own employee blew the whistle on the practice, a supervisor observed it happening, the agency fired the employees, and the female screener who was fired admitted to the fondling conspiracy.

No one was held accountable. At TSA, no one ever is held accountable. It gives a whole new meaning to the expression, “Your ass is mine.”

TechDirt has the details on how they did it.

The plan involved him signalling to a colleague who was working the scanning computer. That agent would tell the computer that the individual being scanned was female, which apparently would set off an “anomaly” alert for the groin area, allowing the male TSA agent to conduct a “pat down” of that area. Leaving aside the fact that these computers even have “male” and “female” settings and it can determine an “anomaly in the genital area” if they don’t match — this kind of thing was exactlywhat many insisted was going to happen when the TSA put in place these advanced screening procedures.

And also, the details on how the TSA was able to torpedo the criminal investigation, as they routinely do:

Specifically, the TSA was first told about this scheme on November 18th of 2014. First, it took nearly two months for the TSA to do anything about it, and it did not contact the police during this time. Instead, on Feburary 9th, TSA investigator Chris Higgins observed the screening area and saw the signal/button push/grope of the genitals. Higgins made no attempt to speak with or identify the victim of this assault (this is important). Instead, he just spoke with the two TSA agents who were terminated at some later time (exact date not clearly indicated). The Denver police were not told about any of this until over a month later, on March 19th, 2015, at which point they noted that without a named “victim” there wasn’t much they could do.

In other words, the soi-disant “investigator,” Higgins, deliberately set the whole thing up so his groping buddy was de facto immune to prosecution. Even though there were at least three actively involved in the groping conspiracy, and several layers of enablers who got the perv off, we’ll be ultra-charitable and just count this as 1. TSA 1, Humanity 1.

Really, Gropers

tsa checkpointThe TSA Watch blog (if there were no such thing, it would have to be invented) notes that Judicial Watch has received a partial FOIA response (for which JW had to sue the TSA, who dragged their feet for almost a year before producing these public records). These records mostly document incidents of TSA groping and sexual assault, which is very common and seldom if ever punished. The partial response ran to 58 pages of TSA Pervs, with most substantive data redacted. The TSA has redacted the names of its sexual assault perps, including the one that hit a man so hard in the testicle (“testical” in TSA 70-IQ spelling) that he cried out, and the one that groped an elderly cancer patient and her colostomy bag. Sick, sick, sick people homunculi, all of them.

Even though there are 58 pp. of secret (and unpunished! TSA means never having to say you’re sorry) gropers, we’ll be charitable again: TSA 1, Humanity 2.

And They Lose their IDs in Atlanta, and Dallas-Fort Worth

NBC 5 in DFW found a few… thousand… missing badges (along with TSA uniforms, FFDO credentials, and all kinds of stuff lost, strayed or stolen at various airports).

An exclusive NBC 5 investigation found hundreds and perhaps even thousands of airport security badges, known as Secure Identification Display Area (SIDA) badges, are unaccounted for across the country.
NBC 5 Investigates requested records from some of the nation’s largest airports asking how many SIDA badges are unaccounted for.
Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport sent a response saying more than 1,400 badges were lost or stolen over approximately two years.

So, the TSA moved quickly to follow up, right? Ha, ha. This is the TSA we’re talking about. It moved quickly to cover up.

TSA blocks access to missing badge records after NBC 5 Investigates’ request….

Before NBC 5 Investigates could get missing ID badge information from other airports, like Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport, the Transportation Security Administration stepped in and said we couldn’t have those numbers.

The TSA said it is security sensitive information and they don’t want to say just how often airport ID’s go missing at each airport.

Note that TSA management didn’t find the lost, strayed or stolen badges, a news agency did, after TSA management neglected the absentee badges for years. 

We’ve established a precedent of only counting all the wrongdoing in one story as 1, so: TSA 1, Humanity 2.

OK, so the DFW TSA droids are reckless with their IDs, but it surely isn’t happening elsewhere, is it?

And They Lose their IDs in San Diego

Says the national NBC site and NBC San Diego, following up on the DFW story.

[M]ore than 270 badges went missing at the San Diego International Airport in the last two years.

And some of those wayward badges were not reported for weeks or months — meaning they were not quickly deactivated.

Workers are supposed to report a missing badge within 24 hours, and the San Diego airport authority said it plans to do more to ensure that rule is followed.

Gee, but we’re sure that’s not happening anywhere else, because TSA supervision and management is made up of the members of this outfit singled out by .gov for promotion! TSA 1, Humanity 3.

And They Swear By Their Machines, But Don’t Know if They Work

During the controversy over what TSA calls Advanced Imaging Technology and what the rest of us know as nekkid scanners (like the one made by the British pioneer of the technology, Rapescan), you couldn’t crack a newspaper without some TSA panjandrum of perversity standing by the machines with unqualified statements of support. Based on? It turns out, zip. The Washington Times:

TSA cannot adequately oversee the maintenance of equipment routinely used to screen passengers and their baggage as they travel to and from various airports throughout the country, the report states.

“Because TSA does not adequately oversee equipment maintenance, it cannot be assured that routine preventative maintenance is performed or that equipment is repaired and ready for operational use,” the report said. “Without diligent oversight … TSA risks shortening equipment life and incurring costs to replace equipment.”

Hey, sophisticated digital gear don’t need no stinkin’ PM, does it? Well, not in TSA-land.

That makes it: TSA 1, Humanity 4.

And the GAO Finds Plenty of Fail

Let’s consider some of this year’s GAO reports. The first is the one the Washington Times keys on above.

GAO 15-559 T published 13 May 15

Errors in screening system, errors in personnel performance, no concrete plan to address them.  And there’s this:

GAO found that TSA performance assessments of certain full-body scanners used to screen passengers at airports did not account for all factors affecting the systems.

Meaning? The TSA “tested” the systems without the software that de-pervs the body images turned on, and without evaluating the operators’ skills (or, being TSA, lack of the same). In plain English, the tests of the Rapescan and backscatter machines are fraudulent.

GAO-15-465 T published 25 Mar 15

TSA implemented it’s “Managed Inclusion” and “TSA Pre√” programs with no plan for evaluating them, and no scientific rigor in the evaluation; so-called testing of the Behavioral Detection Officer witch-doctors and TSA canines is similarly flawed, or as GAO puts it, doesn’t “adhere to established evaluation design practices”. Of course not: the results are command-defined a priori; they can’t have data screwing up their program.

GAO-15-261 published 4 Feb 15

It turns out that when TSA decides to add or remove items from its Prohibited List (the stuff like your bottle of shampoo that’s verboten in the cabin), they don’t actually do a risk assessment most of the time, and when they do, they may ignore it. They also don’t ask mere stakeholders like pilots, flight attendants, airline executives, or actual security professionals for input into these decisions, even though somebody set them up a committee of folks like that. Hey, they are the TSA. Proud holders of GEDs and defenders of the public from anyone they feel like groping and anything they feel like banning.

So here we are with: TSA 1, Humanity 7. (Each GSA report deserves its own number).

The Summing-Up

The employees of the TSA are the sweepings of the gutters, the scum of the earth, the refuse of the prison system. If you see that agency listed on a resume, you can safely assume that the person is a pervert, a thief, a pedophile, or probably all three.

As we have said once or twice before, “No one good, decent, honest, intelligent, competent, moral or ethical has ever been employed by TSA in any capacity whatsoever.”


The Latest Entitlement: Bye-Bye Speeding Tickets

Speed-Limit-Enforced-by-Aircraft_1First, there was a safety net. Enough food so widows and orphans could survive. A roof over your head.

Then, it became a hammock. Cash payments. EBT cards for booze, drugs, junk food. A roof over your (and your kids’, and gangbanger grandkids’, and everybody’s felon boyfriend’s) heads in a better neighborhood, because being poor non-working class should be better than being working class. Then, there was the Obamaphone (which really seems to have started on W’s watch), because what welfare leech impoverished-American should have to dip into the meth-and-oxy money to pay a wireless bill? Then there was multiple Obamaphones so you could replace all the ones you lose in the crack of you ass sofa. What could be next?

What’s next is, permanent traffic-ticket payment holiday for unproductive-Americans. Not for you, wage slave: millions on welfare are depending on you.

Calling California’s traffic court system a “hellhole of desperation” for the poor, Gov. Jerry Brown is proposing an amnesty program for residents who can’t afford to pay off spiraling fines and penalties that have resulted in 4.8 million driver’s license suspensions since 2006.

The push by the Democratic governor spotlights concern among lawmakers and court administrators that California’s justice system is profiting off minorities and low-income residents. It’s a civil rights issue that has prompted discussions between the Brown administration and the U.S. Department of Justice, according to the governor’s spokesman, Evan Westrup.

via News from The Associated Press.

The story solicits quotes from all the usual suspects and community organizers:

  • Michael Herald, a “legislative advocate” for the Western Center on Law and Poverty
  • Christine Sun, associate director of ACLU of Northern California.
  • Sen. Bob Hertzberg, D-Los Angeles
  • Senate President Pro Tem Kevin de Leon, D-Los Angeles

They even manage to find a guy who’s been out of work for 18 months and needs his license back for his next 18 months out of work, because he’s a minority, right. Los Angeles is just like Bull Connor’s one-party empire and he’s only bein’ picked on ’cause he’s black.

The law? That’s for the white white and Asian working people.

By the way, guess where all those leech lawyers poverty pimps advocates for the downtrodden come down on your gun rights, Californians?

Yes, Virginia, Legislators and Cops can be Imbeciles

There seems to be a general assumption that the police, legislators, and other government authorities understand the law, for example, the law of freedom of speech and its very few, very narrow (and generally, shrinking) exceptions.

Kristin Holmes, 26, was arrested for harassment by computer after she got into an online dispute, she told NBC12.

Holmes said she posted the picture of her pointing the gun at the camera because someone had mistaken her for another woman and started arguing with her.

“So you know the difference when u (sic) come find me,” the caption read.

“It wasn’t a threat,” Holmes, of Chesterfield, said. “I thought it was a funny picture, and then I realized later it was a little bit intimidating. So I took it down.”

OK, so here’s the selfie in question:


Hmmm. Pretty girl. Weak trigger discipline. Funny picture. But what came next wasn’t funny:

Before she did, someone reported the picture to Henrico police. Holmes now faces up to a year in prison and a $2,500 fine.

Holmes was arrested under a Virginia law, passed in 2000, that criminalizes obscene or threatening language online or in public.

This law was drafted, and must be being enforced, by people who have neither read the Constitution nor 1st Amendment case law. And indeed, the story confirms that:

Kevin Carroll, president of the Virginia Fraternal Order of Police, said he wasn’t sure how common similar arrests are but said they usually result from arguments that get too personal.

“It’s not a matter of free speech,” he told the Daily News. “Free speech doesn’t say you have the right to insult somebody else or threaten them in any form.”

via Va. woman arrested for ‘Facebook thugging’ after gun selfie – NY Daily News.

Say what? “Free speech doesn’t say you have the right to insult somebody else?” Well, time to insult the room-temp-IQ moron Kevin Carroll. Kevin, you’re an anti-American doofus. How stupid can one get? Does someone have to feed him with a spoon and wipe his chin? Because he doesn’t have a normal-IQ child’s understanding of what free speech means.

If one doesn’t have the right to insult somebody, you featherbrained imbecile, especially when the object of the insult is as deserving as a crumb like you, one doesn’t have free speech. Whatever lower form of life your mother mated with to [bleep] you into existence, she didn’t bring forth a reasoning, rational human being, but rather a censorious asshat with National Socialist tendencies. You are a pillock, a git, a retard, a mongoloid, a cretin, an idiot, an imbecile. You’re ugly and your mama dresses you funny. You smell of elderberries.

There, we insulted you. Come and arrest us. We can afford representation, unlike the people the  no-good, brain-dead, phony cops of the Henrico, VA PD pick on.

This is a bogus arrest, a bogus law, and cops who only think as much as Carroll does are a danger to the public (and themselves, if allowed sharp instruments). Did we say he’s an idiot? Yes, but it bears repeating. He’s an idiot).

(Apologies to Ken White for straying onto his turf, but this one irritates us).

How Baltimore Celebrates Memorial Day

baltimore PD escutcheonSo far: 26 shootings, 9 fatal, bringing the monthly count to 33. But the cops are giving the public what it wants. The people of Baltimore wanted less policing so badly they rioted over it, and now the shooters in all 26 shootings are still at large.

Well, unless they, too, have been shot. First responders are having a hard time keeping up with the dropping bodies. CBS Baltimore:

Councilmember Mary Pat Clarke links the violence to a city still reeling from weeks of unrest.
“It was an earthquake kind of time and i think we’re still dealing with the aftershock,” she says.
The latest victims died early Monday morning. In the Western District a memorial marks the spot where a man and a woman were shot. The man later died, the woman is in critical condition.
North from there, a triple shooting. A man dies after he’s shot in the chest. Then cops discover two other males shot in the incident, including a 17 year old, after they walked to a local hospital.
Neighbors in Govans describe this as a quiet community and say they’re surprised the gun violence spilled into their streets.
“It’s scary because I’ve got kids. I don’t want anything to happen to my kids, especially around here. It’s a peaceful neighborhood,” one person said,
In the Eastern District traces of dry blood after a man is shot in the head and left in critical condition.
WJZ media partner The Baltimore Sun reports 35 people have been killed so far in May making it the deadliest month in Baltimore since December of 1999. Some say the 3-day surge of violence may be a sign of a police department stretched too thin.
“They’ve gone right from the troubles to this spike,” one resident said.
Since the beginning of the year, 108 people have died due to violence in the city.
So far none of the victims have been identified and no arrests have been made. If you have information on any of these shootings you’re urged to contact police.

via 26 Shootings, 9 Fatal, Over Memorial Day Weekend In Baltimore « CBS Baltimore.

Funny, the guy who claims responsibility for the state of crime in Baltimore, former mayor Martin O’Malley, when he was Governor targeted non-criminal gun owners in Maryland for punitive action, and made every effort to drive the state’s gun manufacturer, Beretta out. (Successfully, from his point of view). He also did what he could to drive a wedge between the population of the city — especially, according to The Wire show creator David Simon, the black population — and the police. Having sown the wind, he now wants to ride the whirlwind to more power. (And Simon, for all his criticism, still supports him).

Probable cause from a Baltimore police officer has always been a tenuous thing. It’s a tenuous thing anywhere, but in Baltimore, in these high crime, heavily policed areas, it was even worse. When I came on, there were jokes about, “You know what probable cause is on Edmondson Avenue? You roll by in your radio car and the guy looks at you for two seconds too long.” Probable cause was whatever you thought you could safely lie about when you got into district court.

Then at some point when cocaine hit and the city lost control of a lot of corners and the violence was ratcheted up, there was a real panic on the part of the government. And they basically decided that even that loose idea of what the Fourth Amendment was supposed to mean on a street level, even that was too much. Now all bets were off. Now you didn’t even need probable cause. The city council actually passed an ordinance that declared a certain amount of real estate to be drug-free zones. They literally declared maybe a quarter to a third of inner city Baltimore off-limits to its residents, and said that if you were loitering in those areas you were subject to arrest and search. Think about that for a moment: It was a permission for the police to become truly random and arbitrary and to clear streets any way they damn well wanted.

Simon’s Marshall Project review is one of those Read The Whole Thing™ things, especially for his views of O’Malley:

The drug war began it, certainly, but the stake through the heart of police procedure in Baltimore was Martin O’Malley. He destroyed police work in some real respects. Whatever was left of it when he took over the police department, if there were two bricks together that were the suggestion of an edifice that you could have called meaningful police work, he found a way to pull them apart.

But to be honest, what happened under his watch as Baltimore’s mayor was that he wanted to be governor. And at a certain point, with the crime rate high and with his promises of a reduced crime rate on the line, he put no faith in real policing

O’Malley needed to show crime reduction stats that were not only improbable, but unsustainable without manipulation. And so there were people from City Hall who walked over Norris and made it clear to the district commanders that crime was going to fall by some astonishing rates.

…Martin O’Malley’s logic was pretty basic: If we clear the streets, they’ll stop shooting at each other. We’ll lower the murder rate because there will be no one on the corners.

… They’re an army of occupation. And once it’s that, then everybody’s the enemy. The police aren’t looking to make friends, or informants, or learning how to write clean warrants or how to testify in court without perjuring themselves unnecessarily. There’s no incentive to get better as investigators, as cops.

And the downside of statistically-based policing, that O’Malley imported from NYFC, and this downside has also surfaced there: when everything depends on the books, you have incentives to cook the books:

What can you do? You can’t artificially lower the murder rate – how do you hide the bodies when it’s the state health department that controls the medical examiner’s office? But the other felony categories? Robbery, aggravated assault, rape? Christ, what they did with that stuff was jaw-dropping.

So they cooked the books.

Oh yeah. If you hit somebody with a bullet, that had to count. If they went to the hospital with a bullet in them, it probably had to count as an aggravated assault. But if someone just took a gun out and emptied the clip and didn’t hit anything or they didn’t know if you hit anything, suddenly that was a common assault or even an unfounded report. Armed robberies became larcenies if you only had a victim’s description of a gun, but not a recovered weapon. And it only gets worse as some district commanders began to curry favor with the mayoral aides who were sitting on the Comstat data. In the Southwest District, a victim would try to make an armed robbery complaint, saying , ‘I just got robbed, somebody pointed a gun at me,’ and what they would do is tell him, well, okay, we can take the report but the first thing we have to do is run you through the computer to see if there’s any paper on you. Wait, you’re doing a warrant check on me before I can report a robbery? Oh yeah, we gotta know who you are before we take a complaint. You and everyone you’re living with? What’s your address again? You still want to report that robbery?

They cooked their own books in remarkable ways. Guns disappeared from reports and armed robberies became larcenies. Deadly weapons were omitted from reports and aggravated assaults became common assaults. The Baltimore Sun did a fine job looking into the dramatic drop in rapes in the city. Turned out that regardless of how insistent the victims were that they had been raped, the incidents were being quietly unfounded. That tip of the iceberg was reported, but the rest of it, no. And yet there were many veteran commanders and supervisors who were disgusted, who would privately complain about what was happening. If you weren’t a journalist obliged to quote sources and instead, say, someone writing a fictional television drama, they’d share a beer and let you fill cocktail napkins with all the ways in which felonies disappeared in those years.

See what we mean? That’s how you have a weekend with over two dozen shootings (and counting! The night is young), and zero arrests.

When Guns are Outlawed, only Outlaws Will Have Crazy Girlfriends

The look of cray-cray: Shaynna Sims smirks at the mugshot machine.

The face of bughouse cray-cray: Shaynna Sims smirks at the mugshot machine.

The good news: the victim in this case was already dead (none of the stories say, of what, which, given the decedent’s rival’s relative youth, is interesting). But at least this particular crime isn’t a murder. That’s pretty much the full reach and extent of the good news.

Prosecutors added a fourth felony charge against 26-year-old Shaynna Sims on Thursday, accusing her of removing both breasts and a toe of the deceased woman during a viewing at a funeral home in Tulsa. If convicted, she could face up to five years in prison.

What, that’s it?

‘Fraid so. Fact is, our laws were evolved for the usual run of axe whackers and baby rapers, an element of society that always seems to have been there, at least since Cain slew Abel. The law’s just not ready for Industrial Strength Bughouse Cray-Cray®.

Sims was arrested at the dead woman’s apartment after she attended the viewing on April 30. Police said Sims also stole the dead woman’s shoes and was carrying a knife with the woman’s hair attached to it.
Witnesses told officers they saw Sims reach into the casket during the viewing. The dead woman’s face was found slashed from her hairline to the tip of her nose, her makeup was smeared and her hair was on the floor, police said. The additional mutilation of the woman’s body was discovered as it was being prepared for cremation.

via Oklahoma woman accused of removing dead rival’s body parts – SFGate.

Sims and the decedent were apparently romantic rivals for Sumdood, who goes unnamed in the story. He must be a real prize.

Note: no guns involved, but the Bat Guano Crazy® is strong with this one.

How would you deal with her, if you could imagine your own perfect set of laws into being?

What’s the right penalty for Shaynna Sims? free polls


Decisions, decisions.

Can’t she collect ’em all?

More on the Pennsylvania Registry-not-Registry

pennsylvania_state_reg_formIn comments to our last on the Pennsylvania State Police’s gun-registry-that-is-not-a-registry-because-it’s-so-fulla-holes, we were challenged by a Keystone State resident who doesn’t recall filling out the PSP form. Here’s what we’ve learned.

At one time, they just had the dealers send 4473 copies, but some time relatively recently (~10 years ago), their lawyers had them discontinue that, and generate their own form, PSP SP4-113 (+ variable numbers).

The PSP deliberately does not put this form on the intertubes. That is because their registration bureaucracy, the Firearms Records Unit, came up with a complex numbering system, where each form is uniquely numbered to the FFL that sold the gun (or handled the transfer, for a pistol between private parties). There is also a state ID number which is used not just to ID dealers but also for private transfers done by any county Sheriffs who offer this service. PSP explains:


Application/Record of Sale Form (SP4-113)

This form will be provided by the Pennsylvania State Police and all requests for this form must be submitted in writing. You can fax your requests to (717) 772-4249 or mail requests to Firearm Records Unit, Pennsylvania State Police, 1800 Elmerton Avenue, Harrisburg, PA 17110. Note the pre-printed numbers on this form are assigned to your dealership. Therefore, you can not loan copies to other dealers or duplicate this form. Please allow several weeks for the processing of your order. This form is not available online.

They do make a graphic instructional version available [.pdf], of which we’ve made an illustration here (it embiggens). You can see from this illustrative sample that the form was originally drafted to be used with short and long guns, but now it is required only for handguns.

While a single 4473 can cover multiple guns (our personal record is six), this state form must be done all over again for each gun in a multiple buy — even though they’re all on a single federal form. For each firearm sold or transferred, the dealer collects a $3 surcharge and a $2 Instant Check Fee, which are aggregated and remitted monthly to the State Police.

The copies our Fed friend found in a violent career criminal’s closet, in the boxes with the guns, were copies of this form — PSP SP4-113.

When the other copy gets to the Firearms Record Unit, it’s supposed to be entered in the database, but LEOs think it’s far from a certainty that this will happen, soon, or at all. That’s how you wind up with felons with over-the-counter guns in Pennsylvania —

Meanwhile, some jurisdictions are busting even licensed carriers if their guns don’t show up in this registry-that-isn’t. These cases may not stand up in court, but they’re a way to hassle gun owners — one of new Commissioner Marcus Brown’s major goals for the State Police.