Category Archives: Lord Love a Duck

Student Filmmakers Mistaken for Active Shooters

Last week, a bunch of kids with airsoft toys that look very like real guns were making a student film at their school in Tustin, California. How much like real guns do they look? Real enough that the kids probably don’t even grasp just how close they came to being capped by cops. Behold:

Tustin Cops Fake Gun Photo

After everybody’s pulse rate got back down into the normal range, the cops had a talk with the would-be Tarantinos, so that this film didn’t end like one of Quentin’s bloodbaths, except with buckets of real blood.

By the way, in the image above, two of the guns are the kids’ airsofts. One is one of the cops’ patrol rifle that he responded with. (You can probably figure it out). The cops’ whole statement:

We are currently clearing a call of several subjects with rifles at one of our schools. Ultimately we determined the subjects were local high school students making a film and the rifles were only replicas. Neither the school or the city of Tustin had any knowledge of this incident until we received the radio call. This situation could have turned tragic. Parents, please use caution when allowing your children access to replica firearms. These situations have turned deadly across our nation. The photo shows two of the rifles we encountered on this call. The third rifle in the photo is one of our real rifles that we responded with. We included it to show you how realistic these weapons can appear, especially in darkness.

Really, a kid can get hurt playing with the wrong toys. But if you deny kids any engagement with real guns under adult guidance, they’re going to develop their own knowledge under peer guidance. That seems to be the antithesis of a good idea.

A hearty hooah to the Tustin cops for not shooting anybody. Can you imagine how they’d crucify the poor cop that nailed one of these kids? But look again at the guns — it would be hard to fault a cop for jumping to what turned out to be a wrong conclusion.

Sometimes the best thing is to sit weapons tight and develop the situation.

Military PC Roundup: It’s Getting Thick Out There


Priorities. Totalitarian movements and graphic designers — a match made in heaven. Or the Other Place.

There are times when you cannot accomplish the mission with the resources in hand. You’ve all seen the scene from Downfall where three sweating generals are trying to explain to a shaky Hitler that the Third Reich not only can’t pull off a victory, it’s down to a few hectares of shell-ravaged Berlin. Hitler’s furious at the generals, but the fact of the matter is, no human can deal with that kind of resource imbalance.

Kind of like the situation the Poles faced in September 1939, or the Norwegians in April 1940. Fight, or fold? You’re going to lose either way… there are reasons to make either decision, and it’s probably an emotional call that rationalized ex post facto.


Priorities. Because all that matters is skin color, genitals, and who/what you bump ’em with.

Naturally these decisions come up not only on a national scale, but on squad level as well. Do you fight like a lion and probably die trying to save Hill X in Korea from 10,000 screaming Chinese, or do you surrender and probably die in captivity?

It is, however, a rare decision. Most of the time, though, you do have a choice. When military commanders complain about resources, they often are complaining about something completely different. History abounds in examples where seemingly inferior resources still delivered a win. The problem is less one of absolute resources, than of resource allocation; of priorities.

American officers are complaining about being resource constrained right now.

We’ll stipulate that the other services have similar complaints. Is it resources, or is it priorities?

    • ITEM: there was plenty of money, time and resources to produce this buzzword-rich “Army vision”[.pdf]
    • ITEM: Sure, there’s no spare parts, no aircraft or ships, and definitely no concept of employing them if we had ’em, but no nation before has ever had such a well-illustrated DOD Diversity and Inclusion Strategic Plan [.pdf] (It contains the note that, “Preparation of this report/study cost the Department of Defense a total of approximately $570,000 in Fiscal Years 2012-2017.”)
    • ITEM: dod_human_goalsThey probably didn’t blow a whole half-million on the “DOD Human Goals.” (.pdf) Everyone who signed this broadsheet of bubbly blather? Whatever their priority is, it’s not national defense.
    • ITEM: There has never been a SHARP briefing canceled because of budget cuts, unlike lower priorities, like, say, rifle qualification, which gets canceled all the time. (SHARP is this year’s buzzword for SJW drafted sensitivity training that teaches a bizarre theoretical framework that all Army men are rapists and all Army women helpless victims. Check out the official website of Army Rape Month for more information).

      Not Just the Army: The Navy Celebrates Rape Month, Too (with extra sodomy?)

      Not Just the Army: The Navy Celebrates Rape Month, Too (with extra sodomy?)

  • ITEM: There are unlimited resources to enforce PC at West Point, including Orwellian “Respect Boards.”
  • ITEM: There were plenty of resources to blow on a navel-gazing Army Posture Statement. (The .pdf is here). Our assesment of posture? Supine.
  • ITEM: Aimless Ash Carter has had the money to resource, we are not making this up, a new defense policy of “no intimidating“.
  • ITEM:There seems to be plenty of money for “yes men and fan boys.”
  • ITEM: No one in Washington speaks for soldiers or vets, but the Saudi terror financiers and promoters behind 9/11 have eight sure-I’ll-sell-out-my-country lobbying firms on retainer — and all Washington insiders of both parties happily take their blood money.
  • ITEM:
    More reeducation. The diversity beatings will improve until everyone loves Big his brother.

    More reeducation. The diversity beatings will improve until everyone loves Big his brother. Uh, ze’s brother? Hir brother? Oh crap, no we have to report for more reeducation.

    we got lots of women elevated to high places, like command of the new unarmed LCS, USS Manchester (motto of the LCS fleet: “Dindu Nuffin!”), one of 53 functionally unarmed ships whose function is, apparently, to provide command opportunities for Valuable Diversity Beans® like, well, the new commander; and arguably, to provide potential enemies with their fair share of targets. Another lady has assumed the command of NORTHCOM. The Pentagon these days prides itself on choosing the best available woman or minority for the job.

  • ITEM: Not far enough: inept National Security Advisor Susan Rice, herself a Valuable Double Diversity Bean®, says that intel leadership demands women-and-minority quotas. Hey, it worked for her.
  • ITEM: If he wants a pardon, or just wants keep getting those sweet checks from his lobbying-firm masters, David Petraeus knows what he needs to do. Suck up. So he does.
Every month is gay pride month these days.

Every month is gay pride month these days.

It’s even happening to our allies. The Great Buggernaut has rolled over Britain’s partner to our NSA, the Government Communications HQ, with its major leadership focus lately being spent on a groveling apology about having been unkind to gays in the past. Hey, they’re fabulous in defense jobs: let a thousand Blunts bloom.

But we’ve found a failure in the system, a rift in the ether of social-justice space time. You see, at West Point, the super fabulous Women of Awesome are, shockingly, ghettoized in women’s sports teams. Surely Army football would finally Beat Navy for the first time since what, the Eisenhower years? if they simply put some of that Grrrl Power in the offensive line. (It would certainly be the most watched Army-Navy game ever!)

Now, perhaps, you see why, despite the USAF being unable to generate one lousy twos-ship of jets out of a squadron, or the USS Manchester and her feeble sisters off to sea, unable to launch anything more warlike than a firmly worded statement,the priorities of the current leaders of the Department of Defense are perfectly ordered, once you understand what matters along the Acela Corridor.

As we sail off into the bright sunlit uplands (which suggests a navigation issue, but never mind), always remember, comrades, the DOD motto: Diversity is our Vibrancy!

hrs_Hispanic Heritage Month Poster 2012 Final

Have you ever noticed, there’s a month for everybody but one endangered minority? Warfighters?

A School System Full of Weapons

(Not this school system's pile. This is a file pile).

(Not this school system’s pile. This is a file pile).

“A School System Full of Weapons”? Actually, that describes what we had growing up, where one of the teachers might bring in his Springfield and some old gear to illustrate something about the First World War, or a couple of us might have squirrel guns in our cars for after school. All the guys carried a pocket knife and a lighter.

Today, they’d probably throw us so far back in the school brig that we’d have to be fed by Wrist Rocket. And actually fire the teachers (but keep the pervy ones, because Vibrant Diversity® FTW). Then, they didn’t have a school brig. See what Progress® gets ya?

So that leaves us a little unsure how to react to this tale in the Daily Mail. It’s hard to get inside the minds of the uncredited reporter there; we suppose it’s a steady job, but he wants to be a paperback writer. Anyway, we’re not sure whether the best angle on this is:

  1. the sheer gun-fearing wussiedom of the schools;
  2. the degree to which Britons are aghast that Yanks have eeeeewwww guns. (We can assure our UK readers that they are not slimy, merely smooth and cool to the touch);
  3. the fact that all this keys off a notoriously mobbed-up union, the Teamsters, getting twaumatized by weapons in the schools (we’ll believe the Teamsters have turned over a new leaf when they give up the mortal remains of purged capo Jimmy Hoffa);
  4. the fact that the famously-violent union supposedly twaumatized by all these guns supported Andrew Cuomo and his SSAFE Act, which was supposed to usher in the era of the New Soviet Man or something;
  5. The laziness of reporters, which we bring full circle by writing a report based entirely on a Daily Mail report which is based entirely on a New York Post report which is based entirely on sniveling provided by the union goon. At least we’re self-aware; not sure if the paperback writers in Fleet Street are, also. If so, Troll Level: Journeyman at least.

Anyway, here’s the Mail, with some interspersed snark:

Terrifying haul of 2,000 revolvers, handguns, meat cleavers and daggers confiscated from children as young as 11 in NY schools in just 10 months… and the NYPD are trying to keep the problem a secret.

Um, revolvers are handguns. Would you write “Horses, animals, vegetables and minerals…”? Well, you actually mightn’t, but they very well might. It is the Daily Mail, after all.

1,751 guns, knives and other weapons were confiscated from children in the city’s schools between July 1, 2015, and May 8 of this year.

Didn’t he just say 2,000? He did (look in the previous quote). Don’t know how to break it to the Math Is Hard Barbie reporter here, but 1751 ≠ 2000.

That is a rise of more than quarter from the same time last year

Forgive us if we find your estimate a bit dubious, without the underlying number. But it might be right, as the Ferguson Effect has many major-metro cops “going fetal,” to borrow Rahm Emanuel’s evocative condemnation of his own PD; a lot of places have crime up a quarter, and it’s a toss-up whether Rahm or De Blasio despises his cops more.

Shocking figures were released as school safety agents were thanked

Greg Floyd, the Teamsters local leader. Note union/Cuomo campaign signs.

Greg Floyd, the Teamsters local leader quoted in the article. Note union/Cuomo campaign signs.

The passive voice here hides the fact that the “school safety agent” is a neither-fish-nor-fowl level of city employee who isn’t a teacher, isn’t a cop, but is very well paid for a guy or gal whose occupational requirement is ability to fog  mirror. (Like TSA, but the upper crust thereof).

Revolvers, 9mm handguns, meat cleavers and daggers.

These are just some of the weapons schoolchildren are bringing into classrooms in New York City on a daily basis.

Boys and girls, some as young as 11, have taken them out to use during fights while others have used them to target other youngsters.

According to the New York Post, the dangerous items have been confiscated by faculty at schools, some of which don’t have metal detectors.

OK, now they’re admitting that the whole thing is really the Post’s report. Halfway down the page. (Not that the Post, either, is likely to employ someone who can identify a gun three times out of five at five paces).

An investigation has revealed how a huge number of dangerous weapons are being taken into New York schools on a daily basis. This revolver was found on a student at M169 on the Upper East Side.

NY School Revolver

“An investigation has revealed.” Hell of a way to say, “Union representatives, who are looking for a lever in contract negotiations, handed us a prefab story…” The junk revolver appears to be a die-cast zinc el cheapo, and the Made in Italy origin statement was enough for us to track it down. It’s a close cousin of this cheap Italian .22 blank starter pistol, the Mondial Model 1060, if it isn’t exactly the same thing. The one at the link sold at auction … for a penny. If the Mondial name was ever applied to a real firearm, news of such has yet to arrive in Googlestan.

I bet they don’t submit these to trace, for fear they’d raise Time to Crime numbers and undermine the push for New Laws To Punish Those Who Didn’t Commit Any of These Crimes.

This .38 caliber pistol was found loaded with a single bullet at PS 40 high school in Queens. Safety officials say they are being threatened with punishment if they release information about weapons being taken from kids.

NY School Hi-Point

Ah, yes, the mighty Hi-Point. Not only that, it had… drumroll please… “a single bullet.” (The guy would mean cartridge, if he knew what that was. Or maybe he does and has too little faith in the Mail readership. Of course, it can’t be an edgy report without an edged weapon, too:

NY School Dagger

This dagger was confiscated at Newtown High School in Queens. It was one of 1,751 weapons seized from schoolchildren between July 1, 2015, and May 8 of this year.

Ah, yes. The Mall Ninja Store blue-light special, this. Actually the deadliest weapon of the three, but like the Hi-Point with “one bullet,” it’s probably only good for one shot. “Hey, let’s put some weakening holes in here!” — said no knifesmith, ever.

Hard to imagine the blood of Churchill and Nelson and Shackleton running cold over this pathetic display, but evidently it does. One hopes Alfred the Great is not looking down at the moment, or he might be moved to weep.

But we finally do get to some numbers:

Between July 1, 2015, and May 8 of this year, safety agents and cops recovered a total of 1,751 guns, knives and other weapons in schools.

That’s a rise in 26 percent from the same period last school year, when 1,394 weapons were confiscated, according to data provided to the Post by the NYPD

Gregory Floyd, president of the safety agents union in the city, Teamsters Local 237, told the newspaper the NYPD are cracking down on people who tell the public about the weapons seized from youngsters.

Those who leak information to the press have also been threatened with docked vacation days.

Floyd told the Post: ‘The purpose is to intimidate and to make an example of them so other safety agents will be afraid to report crime.’

He added: ‘If there’s no information to report, (Mayor) de Blasio can come out with his skewed numbers that crime is down and schools are safe, and parents don’t get a true picture of what’s going on.

Now this makes sense in a twisted sort of a way.

‘We shouldn’t be in the secrecy business. We should be in the business of making sure weapons brought to school doesn’t happen.’

Well, with that command of grammar, he’d better stick with his union gig. Of course, we can’t expect too much from the guy, he’s probably a graduate of these same pathetic schools.

Mona Davids, president of the New York City Parents Union told the Post: ‘It’s a cover-up, while putting the lives of our children and school staffs at risk.’

Families for Excellent Schools, an organization who has sued the NYPD for failing to protect their children at schools, says the latest statistics proves more weapons are being taken into schools on a daily basis.

Um, the police have no duty to protect anyone in particular. Established law, we’re afraid. And notice the reporter’s lapse into NYC Public School graduate grammar: “statistics proves.” Subject verb agrees should, no?

The NYPD defending its response to the seizures in a statement and insisting information that is ‘disseminated’ must be approved.

Then, the article shoots itself in the foot by announcing the following are “examples of dangerous weapons taken into New York schools in the last two months”. If you read them, you can see they’re more like “examples of dangerous weapons taken into New York schools in the last two months,” but this reporter’s innumeracy apparently extends to the differences between the various single-digit whole integers.

On March 15 – An 11-year-old boy sneaked a .38-caliber handgun loaded with one bullet into PS 40 in Jamaica, Queens. He was seen waving the gun at another student he had a beef with.

That’s the Hi-Point illustrated above. Note: the punk in question was eleven. Given New York’s attitude to crime and criminals, and the expected pace of medical advances, he could still be crimin’ in the 22nd century.

On March 17 – A 15-year-old student stashed a .38-caliber handgun in his backpack and smuggled it into York Early College Academy, a middle school in Jamaica. He was spotted flashing the revolver during a dispute with students in a stairwell.

This kid was Old School, with some cheesy alloy (Zamak strikes again?) .38 Smith knockoff, complete with round-noses and a shades-of-Joe-Colombo electrical taped grip (per criminal legend, defeats fingerprints). The Mail didn’t have the picture but the NY Post did:


Seriously, that’s like a crime gun from 1966 that’s been in some kind of criminal time capsule for the last fifty years.

On March 22 – A 14-year-old boy at Dr. Gladstone H. Atwell Middle School in Crown Heights, Brooklyn took a 9mm pistol and two magazines of bullets in his backpack. When a dean questioned him about a prior fight with neighborhood kids, he admitted packing heat.

That’s this fine example of firearms technology, which appears to have been cared for appropriately:

NY School Jennings

It’s a “Jennings Nine,” made by the Southern California nest of junk-gun makers that anti-gunners have dubbed “the ring of fire.” Anybody who’s been a cop for a while has taken a Jennings or two into evidence, but the more common ones are the pocket pistols. Thing is, for all their use in crime, many tens of thousands of these kinds of cheap guns are used by people who can’t afford our tuned designer work of defensive art, but still have every right to defend themselves. Drive up the price of guns, and the only gainers are the criminals.

On March 29 – A 14-year-old student at Urban Assembly School for Careers in Sports in Concourse Village in The Bronx pulled a steak knife on a 16-year-old boy.

We’ll go to the Post for this one:


We’re guessing that the “Urban Assembly School for Careers in Sports in Concourse Village in The Bronx” sends more grads (and dropouts) to the NY DOC than to the NBA, NFL or MLB. And we wonder what sport in particular this young sport had in mind.

Now his mom’s one steak knife short. Think she’ll be mad when she finds out?

On April 4 – A 13-year-old boy reportedly threatened a female student with a .22-caliber revolver at M169 Robert F. Kennedy on the Upper East Side, then passed the gun to a friend.

That’s the cheesy zinc alloy revolver visible earlier in this report.

On April 8 – A 16-year-old boy was allegedly found with a medieval-style dagger at Newtown High School in Elmhurst, Queens. It was uncovered after a 17-year-old girl told authorities that he had put it to her neck.

That’s the mall-ninja toad stabber seen above.

And the soi-disant “students” have been expelled from school, charged, and convicted of SAFE Act violations, and sent to prison, right? Right? Anybody?

Don’t be silly. The law is meant to be used as a stick to beat gun-owners Upstate, not Downstate hood rat gangbangers in the school (and hood rat gangbanger wannabees, which is the feedstock of gangbanger production). It’s certainly not meant to be used on actual criminals. 

NY Post guns in schoolsClicking through to the Post’s story, which was the cover story (right), we see that Postie Susan Edelman, no more au courant on guns than her hoplophobic British opposite numbers, spins it differently:

These are the guns and knives Mayor de Blasio doesn’t want you to see.

A surging tide of weapons — including loaded revolvers, 9mm handguns, meat cleavers and daggers — has been confiscated this year from students in city schools, most of which do not have metal detectors.

But instead of praising unarmed school safety agents for grabbing the weapons, the NYPD is cracking down on them for alerting the press and public, according to Gregory Floyd, president of the agents union, Teamsters Local 237.

Ah, it’s all Bill De Blowfish’s fault. Have you ever noticed that for New Yorkers, especially New York media functionaries, the worst mayor in history is the one they have right now, compared to the one they had before him, who was second best — and the one they will support to replace this schmo, that next one is going to be the Best Mayor Evah.

Edelman is alarmed that only some schools have metal detectors, and that most of the weapons were seized in schools without. Amazingly, though, almost 700 weapons were seized in the schools with the detectors, making one wonder about those union dudes running. Here’s the number.

Of the weapons seized this academic year, 698 came from schools with metal detectors, the NYPD stats show. Students brought 1,053 weapons — 60 percent of the total — into schools unequipped with metal detectors.

The mayor is reporting crime in the schools is down, but it seems to be simply that juvenile criminals are not being charged.

Floyd also disputes the city Department of Education’s new discipline policy, which discourages student suspensions, and a pilot program to give “warning cards” to students for marijuana possession or “disorderly conduct” such as yelling, cursing, fighting and assaults. Some offenses previously might have warranted a criminal summons.

“In many cases, the children aren’t arrested, so the crime statistics are down, but it’s just not being reported,” Floyd said.

And we’ll close with a couple more of the little darlings’ playthings. The Post says of this catch:

On March 11, a safety agent at Fashion Industries HS in Chelsea found a 4-inch razor blade in a girl’s backpack. When she began to kick and scream, a report said, three agents restrained and handcuffed her before finding a 10½-inch meat cleaver in her bag.

NY School cleaver

That’s both of them in that grainy picture, the razor blade and the cleaver.  And then there’s this cleaver — it’s not the same cleaver, but its point of confiscation is unknown.


Now against that, before you send your kids to the New York City Public Schools, you need to weigh the fact that these Dewey Factories prepare their students (at least the ones that survive to graduation) perfectly well to compete for the unskilled factory jobs of the 1890s and beyond, like at the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory; or to work as slackjawed government clerks.


Fail and Flail with the TSA

B1_TSA_deedum_AH1The TSA is failing, and flailng.

It told Congress last month that it was desperate for money, and running out of people; managers have no ideas about why the agency is hemorrhaging its people, except that they must not be paying enough to crony recruiters and advertisers and, probably, pressgangs that find TSA material in the halfway houses and rehab joints of major metro areas. The Daily Caller:

More than 100 of the Transportation Security Administration’s 48,000 airport screeners quit each week, and whistle-blowers told congressional investigators that “we remain an agency in crisis.”

The personnel losses affect airport screening times across the country.

“Many airports are complaining that TSA is getting worse, not better,” said House Oversight and Government Reform Committee Chairman Jason Chaffetz.

Is that even possible? Is Chaffetz trying to suggest that, having hit rock bottom, the TSA bums have started deep-shaft mining?

So is the problem not enough accountability? Some of the line dogs think so.

TSA staffers testified Wednesday that senior employees are often not held accountable for misconduct and the TSA office created a hostile work environment by intimidating personnel by abusing integrity testing.

“These leaders are some of the biggest bullies in government,” Jay Brainard, a TSA security director in Kansas, told committee. “While the new administrator of TSA has made security a much-needed priority once again, make no mistake about it, we remain an agency in crisis.”

No surprises there. Although Brainard would go on to surprise us. We’ll get back to him in a few.

One really bad place right now is Chicago. (Well, it’s a really bad place all the time, but now the airports have made even leaving to go someplace better an ordeal). USA Today:

At Chicago Midway, a flier’s video showing an agonizingly long Thursday line at the checkpoint there has gone viral, racking up more than 2.1 million views since it was posted.

“I got to the end, (and) I was like, holy (expletive), people would probably like to see this,” Sean Hoffman says about his video in a Monday story in the Chicago Tribune.

Hoffman says he barely made his 7:50 p.m. flight, despite arriving nearly 3 hours early.

“People were missing their flights,” he tells the Tribune. “I could see some panicked people who had to be somewhere.”

Midway’s the little airport. It was better at O’Hare, right? Uh, wrong:

American Airlines says it rolled out cots on Sunday night because about 450 of its passengers missed their evening flights after getting stuck in long TSA queues.

“Got here two and a half hours before my flight and security took two to three (hours) to get through,” Kevin Revis, a stranded traveler, tells ABC 7 of Chicago.

Things hadn’t improved much by Monday morning, according to ABC 7. The station says “video shot at 5 a.m. Monday shows hundreds of passengers slowly making their way through an hours-long security line in Terminal 3 at O’Hare.”

He waited so long for TSA

He waited so long for TSA….

Remember, this is not American Airlines delays. This is not Chicago delays. This is exclusively and solely TSA mismanagement delays. And it’s not like you’re even getting any security for the huge waste of time and money. (Imagine the staggering economic cost of tens of thousands of productive people standing waiting for TSA’s mongs to get smart, which is not going  to happen). It’s not just Chicago: in Atlanta, WSB-TV warned travelers to be at least three hours early, because two of them would be spent in the line. The AJC, the local paper, published a Line Delay Survival Guide. In Phoenix, a TSA computer failure sent thousands of passengers on their way without their bags, which TSA then dumped on the tarmac. Even tiny Ketchikan, Alaska has been dealing with three-hour TSA delays.

Funny that this all crops up around the time they’re begging for more money.

One thing that seems universal in these delay stories, too, is TSA managers lying about how long their lines are.

Airports have had it and are considering firing TSA and reverting to contract security. It can’t be worse. Phoenix, Seattle and and Atlanta are now running the numbers. The reason more haven’t done it is that they will continue to have to support some TSA overhead presence — the retired-on-duty upper layers of management, most of them idle double-dippers retired from another .gov job — as well as the contract people. But unlike TSA’s lazy, thieving, groping human crime wave, the contract folks can be held responsible for what they do.

Back to the Congressional hearings, it seems like what Brainard was complaining about was, actually, agents being held responsible for helping themselves to travelers’ stuff. His point was, and we are not making this up, that if the item a passenger lost or had stolen was some de minimis value,

Brainard explained that integrity testing kicked into high gear after a news story came out regarding TSA employees stealing passengers’ expensive items like iPads. The TSA Office of Inspection would send an investigator out to an airport and send through TSA like cash, credit cards, DVDs, etc., and leave it. The federal security director would later get a call to recover the items that were left.

“One of the items that they are notorious for planting in an airport is a pen. They will throw a pen on the floor, let’s say in cue and TSO picks it up and doesn’t turn it in they will fly back out a couple of investigators and they will literally interrogate them and push for resignation or they will propose a removal for theft for a pen,” Brainard testified, noting there was a Transportation Security Officer who picked up a planted pen and threw it in the garbage.

“He didn’t think it was worth any money. It was a $200 Mont Blanc pen.”

“We’ve got people picking up pens, and they are sending out these criminal investigators for non-criminal matters. Oh, and by the way, it’s commonplace for them to threaten people with criminal prosecution,” Brainard said. “They are doing people for pens while you got people at our headquarters that are abusing their staff members.”

That is, indeed, Brainard’s position: TSA agents shouldn’t be fired for just stealing pens. Is there any wonder none of your stuff is safe when you travel by air?

Meanwhile, a member of the committee investigation this caprine reproductive act of an agency  has a bleak prognosis:

Oversight Committee Member Florida Republican Rep. John Mica again cautioned, “[TSA Director] Neffenger is well-intentioned. He has tried to correct the situation with more training etc., but TSA can’t recruit. They can’t train. They can’t retain. They can’t schedule. They can’t schedule and it can’t manage the huge bureaucracy that’s been created. That’s part of the problem. And it won’t be corrected.”

You know, one might even conclude that no one good, decent, honest, competent, moral, ethical or intelligent has ever been employed at TSA in any capacity whatsoever. Might he not?



So how stupid are TSA mongs? So stupid that they need an iPad with a “randomizer” app to send people randomly left or right. That’s pretty stupid, just about at the level of brain stem function. But not as stupid as TSA managers, who, unaware that there are many free random binary (aka coin toss) generators for download, spent $1.4 million on the randomizer app.

Wait till they get their PowerPoint bill from Microsoft.


Poly-Ticks: Can’t a Hispanic Crime Victim Sell a Gun in America?

The answer is in, and it’s, “No.” Not if the the victim is George Zimmerman, who was defending himself from a brutal attack by young career criminal Trayvon Martin when one shot from a Kel-Tec .saved George’s life — and may have saved scores or hundreds of others from being robbed, injured or even killed by taking Trayvon off the thug track.

George would like to sell this gun, as it was tied up so long by the Justice Department — even after his acquittal on trumped up charges — that he replaced it. But George has a problem: like it or not he’s a public figure, and the publicity in his case is based entirely on media lies, lies so virulent that another thug, energized by this media malpractice, has taken shots at him since. So when he put the gun up for auction last week, the anti-gun left and the media (but we repeat ourselves) came unhinged.


The Zimmerman trial was a high point to date of dishonest reporting by the national media. Media tactics included a news blackout on Trayvon’s record of drug use and property and violent crime;  use of photos 5, 7 and 10 years old in lieu of more recent ones, all of which showed the little darling with gang tats, smoking dope, handling guns or all of the above; and, durin led to a hyperpublic trial — and then, to the shock of the media and their followers, go George Zimmerman’s acquittal. Because the judge and jury had to consider the actual evidence in the case, not the “facts” that the media made up, this caught people reading the New York Times or watching CNN completely by surprise.

The Times hated George so much they made up a new race for him, “White hispanic,” after initially selling the half-Peruvian-mestizo guy as “white.”

As a result, George Zimmerman may be the most hated man in America today. The media and their verbally violent fellow travelers attacked two successive gun auction sites, driving the gun off both sites (and making at least one delete George’s account).

GunBroker was the first to cave. Predictably, folding to the SJWs did not get the company peace, instead seeing the back-down as proof of GunBroker’s evil. Actually, it was more proof that GunBroker’s managers are spineless. They said:

Late last night, George Zimmerman created a listing on our web site for the gun from the Trayvon Martin case four years ago. Mr. Zimmerman alerted news organizations that began reporting on the listing first thing this morning.

Listings on the web site are user-generated, exactly like social media posts. Mr. Zimmerman never contacted anyone at prior to or after the listing was created and no one at has any relationship with Zimmerman. Our site rules state that we reserve the right to reject listings at our sole discretion, and have done so with the Zimmerman listing.

We want no part in the listing on our web site or in any of the publicity it is receiving. prides itself in being a safe and legal way to buy and sell firearms online in full compliance with all Federal, State, and local laws. proudly supports the Second Amendment rights of the American public. will not be fielding press inquiries regarding this matter.

As power users of GunBroker, we’re disappointed in this quivering collapse into cuckoldry, and therefore, we’ll be buying our next ten firearms outside of GunBroker, in light of their weakness on the 1st and 2nd Amendments. Let them sell guns to their pals in the Black Lives Matter criminal lobby. We’re pretty sure we spend a lot more on hardware for our collection than a entire prison wing full of Black Lives Matter cases spend on their Jennings and Raven cop-poppers, but maybe that’s the market Gun Broker wants to be in.

They may not get this, yet, but throwing the point-and-shriek swarms of the media a scalp does not appease them. It energizes them. Nothing GunBroker does is acceptable to the media, and they’ll be back for another scalp. Soon enough, the strategy of just outrunning the slowest guy leaves you with no slower guy behind you, just the ravenous wolf.  Then what?

This time, the flying monkeys lifted and shifted their fires to the next auction host, United Gun Group. We’d never heard of United Gun Group before, and based on their owner Todd Underwood’s commitment to the rule of law and principle displayed here, we don’t think they’re likely to be around long enough to be worth getting to know.

As an organization, we stand by the rule of law and, while no laws have been broken, we do not feel like it is in the best interest of the organization to continue to host this sale on our platform.

Our mission is to esteem the 2nd amendment and provide a safe and secure platform for firearms enthusiasts and law-abiding citizens; our association with Mr. Zimmerman does not help us achieve that objective.

Good, sign up Travyon Martin and his ilk, then, because you don’t deserve us as buyers on your United Anti Gun Group site. We’d say we’d dance (or something) on your grave, but to be brutally honest we didn’t notice when you arrived, and we probably won’t notice when you go.

You might question our rhetoric, and you might question George in his implacable refusal to allow the media, the BLM criminal lobby, and the left (threedundant, we know) to define him. But he knows instinctively what Day has worked out theoretically and empirically in SJWs Always Lie and in the free excerpt that is Day’s guide to surviving an SJW swarmnever apologize, never back down. Had the managers of GunBroker, or the dunderheaded Underwood read the document, they might have found some traces of calcium along their spinal cords.

An example of the media reporting on this issue illustrates their complete disinterest in reporting facts. Gideon Resnick, a liberal Democrat and a supporter of the Black Lives Matter criminal movement, has a few opinions in his alleged news story at The Daily Beast (formerly Newsweek, before an unwise investor bought the failing propaganda mag for $1). Some of Gideon’s points:

  1. Zimerman is “the disgusting man who killed Travyon Martin.”
  2. Zimmerman’s firearm is “a gun he used to kill a teenage boy,” which is about like saying the SS used Zyklon B for fumigation.
  3. The “asking price is more than $65 million,” which shows that Gid doesn’t understand what an auction is. If Daddy’s trust fund buys you everything, which is typical for Beastweek reporters, you tend to be financially ignorant.
  4. “The killer of Martin flaunts the gun as a valuable item tied to history.”
  5. “…an opportunistic chance to hold on to history, as Zimmerman would garishly like to present it.”
  6. “…the gun…” [is potentially] “a source of racial intimidation or harm.”

Resnick managed to find — don’t they always? — some knob who “supports the 2nd amendment, but…” wants to buy the Zimmerman gun and, presumably, execute the deodand for the crime of the martyrdom of Saint Trayvon. The attention-seeker is a “lifelong gun collector”, he tells Resnick, who somehow can’t raise more than $5k by liquidating his savings. What’s he been collecting, Bubba customs?

“Most violent racists don’t have two dollars to rub together,” the media-whoring broke guy says. Well, he would know. You don’t get to “innocent Trayvon Martin” unless you depart from the full-on race-trumps-everything position.

No doubt if we searched on that guy we’d find him all over Americans for Responsible Solutions, the American Hunters and Shooters Association (remember them) and other Bloomberg-funded “we respect the 2nd Amendment, but” phony pro-gun gun-ban groups. He isn’t worth it; he’s just some fluid stain who wants to be on the news.


Lord Love a Duck: Cat Cafés

CAT-SHOCKED“It’s totally a thing.”

“Is not. Lord love a duck!”

But your humble blogger was wrong. It is totally a thing.

The Cat Café. No, it’s not where they serve overpriced espresso to cats (an experiment that probably produced the image to the right), but where they serve overpriced espresso to cat ladies, in the company of cats.

If you fill out an adoption application, and the crazy cat lady running the café takes a shine to you, you can get a take-out order adopt-a-kitty.

For some reason this is all over the news these days. Maybe it’s a lead-up to Friday the 13th when our cat overlords were supposed to unmask and take over the world, but got distracted chasing a laser pointer instead.

  • ITEM, Atlanta Eater, 4 May 16: We dunno if this is a hoax, because it’s credited to a reporter named Fuhrmeister. But if it’s on the level, a planned cat café funded by a Kickstarter campaign will be the second in the city. Obviously Sherman didn’t burn the place enough. catlady_starter_kit
  • ITEM, CBS, 6 May 16: Brooklyn, New York: The Brooklyn Cat Café opens. It’s bring your own food, and they charge you $5 for 30 minutes. They do provide the cats. Coming soon: Cats With Mats yoga classes. They’re clearly no threat to upend the Crazy Cat Lady stereotype.
  • ITEM, Manchester Confidential, 6 May 16: Cat Café coming to the English former factory town, apparently run by a bonded pair of crazy cat ladies. Paperwork and bureaucracy must be a bear in Blighty — “he has sent forth a swarm of officers to eat out our sustenance” — as it’s not going to open until July. On the plus side, it’s replacing a Short For Arthur gallery; even cats beat that.
  • crazy cat lady starter kit 1ITEM, NEXT Pittsburgh, 6 May 16: Two young incipient Crazy Cat Ladies expect to open a cat café this fall, with Kickstarter funding. Naturally, they’ll offer “a pretty strong focus on some vegan and gluten-free options.” How do you get the cats to play with the patrons? “We’re actually considering having a candy machine filled with cat treats, so you could put a quarter in and get a handful of cat treats….” That’d actually work. But they’d get some fat cats, until the Crazy Cat Ladies of PGH run out of money.
  • suck it schrodingerITEM, CP24, 10 May 16: Toronto, Ontario: Crazy Cat Lady Catfight breaks out between animal shelter and cat café, over whether the café mistreated the moggies. Turns out, the crazy cat ladies of the Toronto Humane Society are torqued that the crazy cat ladies of the TOT Cat Café are charging people money. Apparently all cats yearn to be free, which anyone who’s ever tried to keep a kitty indoors could tell you.
  • ITEM: Atlanta Journal-Constitution, 10 May 16: a poll on whether you’d dine in a cat café or not. About 2/3 say yes; perhaps the others are holding out for Korean cuisine.

So it’s apparently a real thing, and really trending out there. Or the minions at Facebook got instructed to twist their algorithms to sell cat cafés this week. To which we say:


crazy cat lady starter kit 2

Good luck with that. Lord love a duck!


Meh from Jeh, Trash from Ash

Let’s play “Shot, Chaser, Hangover!” with national security. After all, all of official Washington is playing games with national security; why should we be left out?

Shot: Meh from Jeh

Sent to all hands in the Department of Homeland Security, including the utterly demoralized ranks of ICE, CBP and so forth:

Dear Colleagues,

Today, I am pleased and proud to release our new mission statement for the Department of Homeland Security:

“With honor and integrity, we will safeguard the American people, our homeland, and our values.”

Is it just us, or does that conjure images of a previous homeland-obsessed political movement? Is he going to be engraving that on ceremonial daggers, next? It’s an idea that has some history to it, after all.

Heil Jehler

But let’s at-ease the cynicism for a bit and let the Token Black Guy Great Statesman speak:

In March, I asked you to help me write a single, short, and simple statement of who we are as a Department—what we stand for, and what our values should be.

I asked, and you answered. We received nearly 3,000 entries from all across DHS. As we reviewed your suggestions, we saw a lot of similar themes: honor, integrity, service, and strength. I am impressed by the thought that went into each proposal, and by the values our Department shares. And, I was pleased to consult all three former Secretaries of Homeland Security in developing this statement.

So this is the product of a committee of three thousand and three? That is, 3,003 government workers? Boy if that’s not a path to insight, what is?

I’d like to thank each of you who submitted a statement for your time, your creativity, and your thoughtfulness.

However, he didn’t use any of your submissions, if you read the statement carefully. Homie made up his own.

This statement, which will be on display at DHS facilities, is a reminder to all of us of who we are and why we serve.

If we are to succeed in our security mission, we must work together—a Unity of Effort. We have many employees and many components, with many complex responsibilities. But we are one Department, and it’s the unity of our efforts that keep our homeland secure.

Unity. Like one people, one nation, one leader kind of unity? Your boss would like that, and it’s all about pleasuring pleasing the boss, right?

Hey, there was this great Roman symbol of unity, how a bundle of sticks tied together makes great strength. Forget its name. Sure, it’s been used before, but nobody is using it right this moment — go for it, Jeh.

This statement is intended for all our components and all our approximately 226,000 personnel across the entire Department. My hope is that our people will see it as the capstone of our Unity of Effort initiative, and our unifying mission statement for now and long after I am Secretary of Homeland Security.

Thank you for your time, participation, and most importantly, thank you for your service.

Jeh Charles Johnson
Secretary of Homeland Security

So there it is, ICE-men and Border Guards Greeters. You have been Unity of Effort-i-fied. Welcome to TSA World.

Chaser: Trash from Ash

Meanwhile, in the Department of Defense from Bad Thoughts and All The Latest “Isms,” we have Ash Carter hard at work on his first and only priority: social engineering. Speaking to the Air Force Social Justice Academy, from the USAF official report of his remarks:

“Some regions of the world are exceedingly messy, but we’re not daunted or confused, because we have our North Star,” he added.

…The secretary said this is why he is pushing for new ways to recruit and retain the best and why the United States military seeks to be inclusive.

“From the first classes of female cadets, including Brig. Gen. Allison Hickey and your own superintendent, Lt. Gen. (Michelle) Johnson, to the first female combat pilots, including my former assistant, Brig. Gen. Jeannie Leavitt, to Gen. Lori Robinson, who tomorrow will become the first woman to lead a combatant command, the Air Force has proven time and again that we are strongest when we draw from the strength of our entire nation,” he said.

The official remarks do not include excerpts from the Q&A with cadets that followed, but the Navy Times (a social-justice-forward, anti-military Gannett paper) did. Carter shot down questions on tranny troops:

“The question of principle we’ve sort of settled — what matters is people’s ability to contribute to our military,” Carter said when asked about the military’s transgender policy in a question-and-answer session with cadets at the Air Force Academy. “The only barriers we should ever erect to that principle are ones in which there are practical issues that we can’t work through.”

He went on to equate trannies with women, something that more than one airman has done towards the end of a night of heavy drinking:

“The Air Force has proven time and again that we are strongest when we draw from the entire strength of the nation,” Carter said. “Females, after all, make up half the population. It would be foolish to pass over qualified people for any reason that has no bearing on their ability to serve with excellence.”

Yep, we have seen the future and it’s going to be fabulous. Carter also indicated that drones are the future of the USAF. Drag queens and drones… lord love a duck. We’ll have an air force ready to fly anywhere in the world and win, if we can just get the enemy to agree to having the war decided by a lip-synching Combat of Champions!

You know, the PX at Bragg still doesn’t have tranny porn in the checkout aisles.  Can’t Ash crack down on those H8ers?

Hangover: What a Bugout Buys

Hoist high this Jolly Roger, and set yourself forth to roger with extreme jollity....

Meanwhile, how’s actual lower-case homeland security and defense going? A knuckle of coupleheads from the Associated Press have a story in various places (link is to the anti-military Gannett Military Times) about how success continues to elude our Iraq bugout. Unexpectedly.

The Obama administration grappled with a renewed show of force by Islamic State militants on Wednesday as they advanced again toward the ancient Syrian crossroads of Palmyra and exposed the Iraqi capital’s frailty through a series of deadly car bomb attacks.

Naturally, because it’s the Associated (with terrorists) Press, their prime concern is the political impact on their Supreme Personality of Godhead. But when these crumbs advance, a lot of bad stuff happens. And since our departure, bad stuff has happened to good people, and good stuff to bad people, with some frequency, in Iraq.

In Syria,

[T]he U.S. hopes President Bashar Assad and his Russian backers can hold off a fresh offensive near Palmyra several weeks after they pushed IS out of its world-famous ruins and neighboring city. The militants on Wednesday seized a key rocket-launching site about 40 miles away, according to media reports and activists, effectively isolating government forces in Palmyra from supply routes elsewhere in the country.

Now, remember, the US got into this war in the first place because the Administration thought that some posturing against “President Bashar Assad and his Russian backers” would look good. Now the White House is in the they-think-it’s-subtle, looks-to-us-like-it’s-stupid position of wanting Assad to win but without helping him because, as always with these foreign-affairs naïfs, it “wouldn’t play well” with voters and donors at home.

“We certainly do not want to see ISIL expand the territory that they control and we certainly do not want to see ISIL put at risk once again such a historically and culturally significant city,” White House spokesman Josh Earnest told reporters.

But Earnest said the U.S. wouldn’t coordinate defense efforts with Assad’s military or Russia in the event the city faces another capitulation.

So, slightly more earnest Earnest, “we oppose them but not to the point of doing anything.” This awkward position goes completely unnoticed by the two AP drones, who then droned on to write this:

And it would add further evidence of the militants’ surprising capacity to inflict losses on its enemies, after killing a U.S. Navy SEAL last week in Iraq. The special warfare operator, Charles Keating IV, was part of a quick reaction force that moved in to rescue U.S. military advisers from a firefight started by about 100 Islamic State fighters about 14 miles north of Mosul.

If in 2016 you’re writing about “the militants’ surprising capacity to inflict losses,” you need to get your 27-year-old know-nothing ass out of DC and pay a visit to the war, where a better class of Americans has been manning the ramparts between civilization and barbarity for a decade and a half now. The Russians bombing ISIL for Assad have actually done more to keep America safe than any of our current cabinet secretaries, let alone any of the decadent bums of the Associated with Terrorists Press.

But hey, the Partisan Political Police under James Comey have good news:

The developments overseas contrasted with more positive news at home, as FBI Director James Comey declared that fewer Americans were now traveling to enlist with IS as its brand suffers in the United States.

Whereas a couple of years ago investigators saw six to 10 Americans heading to the Mideast each month to join the fight, Comey said that number has averaged about one a month since last summer.

“There’s no doubt that something has happened that is lasting,” he told reporters.

Because, if we’re too nationally and institutionally limp and enervated to fight against Islamism, we can take pride in not fighting for it quite as much.

Lord love a duck.

When Guns are Outlawed, Only Outlaws will have El Caminos

El Caminos Watery GraveIf you’re not an American of a certain vintage, you may not know what an El Camino is. It’s a sort of car-based truck, like what the Australians call a “Ute,” that was Chevy’s 1959 answer to Ford’s 1957 Ranchero. Derided by drivers of “real” trucks as “Cowboy Cadillacs,” but beloved of real cowboys and urban “dudes” alike, both were manufactured into the 1970s.

They’re now popular restoration articles, with the Chevy El Camino in particular drawing nosebleed sums at auction. And thereby hangs a tale.

Rolling a classic car out of the garage after lovingly restoring it to its former glory would be a satisfying feeling for any enthusiast.

But it was short-lived for one man, who was then forced to watch his 1970 Chevrolet El Camino plunge into a canal after he tried to stop it but failed on Saturday morning.

And to add insult to injury, the proud owner suffered a broken leg when he was knocked over as he tried to get into the vehicle and stop it before it careered down a hill and into the Roza Canal near Moxee, Washington.

Yakima County Sheriff’s Office released this picture of a fully restored 1970 Chevrolet El Camino which rolled out of a man’s garage, over his leg – breaking it – and into the Roza Canal

The model had been fully restored and pristine versions of the classic Chevrolet El Camino can fetch more than $100,000

The local Yakima County Sheriff’s department tweeted a picture of the vehicle after it was totally submerged in the water.

The 73-year-old owner had been pushing the fully restored model – which can fetch in excess of $100,000 – out of his garage on Saturday morning to do some extra work when it happened.

But the vehicle gained too much speed and as he chased it to get inside and put the brakes on, he was knocked to the ground.

via Man planning to work on his 1970 El Camino breaks his leg when vehicle rolls over him | Daily Mail Online.

Hopefully, it didn’t take him from 1970 to 2016 to restore this thing, because he’s already 73 and he’s got to do it all over again.

When he recovers from the busted leg, that is.

About that Movie that Caused the Benghazi Attack

Would you trust your diplomatic Mission to this guy?

Would you trust your diplomatic Mission to this guy?

Just about everybody who’s anybody in the foreign policy and national security establishment, or “the Blob,” as former campaign van driver and novelist manqué turned Presidential foreign-policy mind-meld Ben Rhodes calls it, has had something to say about the spectacularly revealing Ben Rhodes profile in the New York Times Magazine.

David Samuels of the Times seems to have conducted the interview the way Times journalists usually do with Administration grandees: on his knees, breathlessly counterposed to the his dehiscent slide fastener of his interviewee’s trousers.

Despite his claim to be outside it,  Rhodes is a card-carrying Beltway Blob made guy, by dint of his position (which he probably owes to having a brother who’s head of CBS “News”). He is a Deputy National Security Advisor on the National Security Council and has nothing but contempt for people who actually have studied, practiced, or (in the instant case) implemented foreign policy, especially not when it comes down to kinetics.

Conversely, nobody is asking, say, retired special operations sergeants and former defense contractors what they think, but why shouldn’t we stick our oar in? Everyone else is.

And right now, everybody is talking about how Rhodes admits that the Iran “deal” was built on myth and sold with lies.

Rhodes’s war room did its work on Capitol Hill and with reporters. In the spring of last year, legions of arms-control experts began popping up at think tanks and on social media, and then became key sources for hundreds of often-clueless reporters. “We created an echo chamber,” he admitted, when I asked him to explain the onslaught of freshly minted experts cheerleading for the deal. “They were saying things that validated what we had given them to say.”

When I suggested that all this dark metafictional play seemed a bit removed from rational debate over America’s future role in the world, Rhodes nodded. “In the absence of rational discourse, we are going to discourse the [expletive] out of this,” he said. “We had test drives to know who was going to be able to carry our message effectively, and how to use outside groups like Ploughshares, the Iran Project and whomever else. So we knew the tactics that worked.”

This is the first admission that groups like Ploughshares and the Iran Project are under de facto Administration control — or maybe it’s the other way around.

He is proud of the way he sold the Iran deal. “We drove them crazy,” he said of the deal’s opponents. ….

In fact, Rhodes’s passion seems to derive … from his own sense of the urgency of radically reorienting American policy in the Middle East in order to make the prospect of American involvement in the region’s future wars a lot less likely. When I asked whether the prospect of this same kind of far-reaching spin campaign being run by a different administration is something that scares him, he admitted that it does.

But there was another glimpse behind Rhodes’s Beltway Blob kimono suggested by that article, aside from whatever Samuels glimpsed through that zipper while achieving his own mind meld with his special friend and interviewee. And it ties into past articles, like this one at, oddly enough, the New York Times: Rhodes describes in the recent, Samuels story how he makes a lie into news. Bear that in mind when you see who the author was of the Administration’s, and then-Secretary of State Clinton’s, pathetic and fabricated claim that the Benghazi attack was a reaction to a YouTube video. Yep, it was Rhodes. Here’s the Times’s Michael D. Shear (another Beltway Blob made guy?) in April, 2014:

The email from Mr. Rhodes includes goals for Ms. Rice’s appearances on the shows and advice on how to discuss the subject of the protests that were raging in Libya and at other American diplomatic posts in the Middle East.

Among the goals that Mr. Rhodes identified: “To underscore that these protests are rooted in an Internet video, and not a broader failure of policy.” In a section called “Top-lines,” Mr. Rhodes added: “Since we began to see protests in response to this Internet video, the president has directed the Administration to take a number of steps. His top priority has been the safety and security of all Americans serving abroad.”

(For the record, the attack was a deliberate attack the extremist al-Qaeda linked militia. The extremists themselves had been suppressed by Qaddhfi, but were turned loose by the quixotic and purposeless war the Administration launched in Libya for reasons that still lack an explanation, except for the general tilt of Obama, Jarrett, Donilon, Rice, Power, Rhodes et al. towards Islamist extremists, and against American interests).

In another point in Samuels’ fluff piece, Rhodes, the self-described Holden Caulfield of the NYU MFA program, is described as having no ego. In the midst of a post that is probably enough for any pshrink to diagnose Narcissistic Personality Disorder in both Rhodes and his interviewer.

Finally, this puts a new light on the various incompatible Hillary Clinton statements about the Benghazi disaster that somehow eventuated on her disinterested and mendacious watch. She herself may have been spun by Rhodes and his small army of suckling and spewing mouths, a group which may well include Clinton eminènce grise Simple Sid Blumenthal.

Swiss Family Bubba

These nightmares were found on Reddit, in /r/guns, a good hunting ground for Bubba and all his works. The worksmanship on these is rather good, which we attribute to the whole Swiss thing; on the other hand, the concepts are purest inbred Bubba.

To start with, let’s have a Martini with a long-eye-relief scope. Apparently the Swiss immediate action drill for TEOTWAWKI is “grab Martini, go inna woods mountains“. Somewhere, an SKS breathes a sigh of relief:

Swiss Bubba Martini

Here’s the story behind these, uh, unusual pieces:

So the story goes that this guy had thousands of guns inside a bunker in his house. He was very keen of modifying the guns, mostly adding pistol grips, suppressors and other modern sights.

Unfortunately he died, and supposedly his son inherited the collection which he’s been slowly selling. He even had a couple of K31s with pistol grips, but he sold those. Sometimes you see some nice rare stuff that he tries to sell, but the problem is knowing if those were modified in any way.

The best is probably this pistol vetterli! I also find that K11 with a Stgw 57 magazine interesting, who wouldn’t want a K11 with a 20 shot capacity?

It’s a nice example of bubba transcending borders and nationality.

IF he says so. They’re available at this link, for those in der Schweiz or able to negotiate the import-export maze.

Here’s another:

Swiss Bubba SBR

Ow. Its purpose is unknown, as the creator has apparently yodeled his last, and family members have been trying (for a while) to shift some of these unique modified firearms.

They probably need to be aiming closer to “parts value.” Here’s a “trench mag” adapted from a SIG auto rifle.

Swiss Bubba TActical

With the ever popular pistol scope forward of the action — not so far forward you can load the mag with anything but single rounds.

Finally, there’s a Swiss take at the Obrez concept.

Swiss Bubba Obrez

Honestly, we’ll stop now. For anyone traumatized, counsellors are standing by.