Category Archives: Phonies and Assclowns

PA State Police Glock 21s in the Shops

Pennsylvania_State_PoliceWe recounted, based in part on news stories and in part on insider tips, the strange tale of what we called the Pennsylvania State Police’s Pistol OCD. If you feel the need to catch up, if you don’t there’s a one-line tl;dr at the end:

  • Everybody wants some other gun (5 Jul 2014): we teased that “a A Large State Police/Highway Patrol force in a populous state suffers from Pistol OCD. They’ve been through three official sidearms in two calibers in four years, and it’s their own fault…. Since 2006, they’ve been through six or seven guns in three calibers.” A commenter from the Keystone State (and not one of our sources on these stories) nailed this as a Pennsylvania State Police reference.
  • Pistol OCD: the Pennsylvania State Police (8 Jul 2014): We bring you up through the PSP’s wild gun changes: Beretta 92/96/Brigadier in 9mm and .40, to Glock 22 in .40, to Glock 37 in .45 GAP, to Glock 21 in .45 ACP, and finally to the SIG 227R in .45 ACP.  Each change was made for plausible, rational reasons, but they wind up looking like an outfit that just can’t make a decision.

We observed at the end of that article that the department’s 4800 Glock 21s would soon be hitting the market, as had all the pistols before:

At least the PSP allows its obsolete guns to be sold in the market. Since every PSP gun is engraved or etched with the force’s crest, they are popular with collectors, helping the vendor recoup the credit he gave for the trade-ins. PSP trade-ins also tend to be well-kept for cop guns, even apart from the Glock 37s scarcely having been shot due to the ammo problem, so they’re an attractive alternative to a new gun for a bargain hunter.

And the tl;dr of all that: PSP changes out their guns a lot, and had 4800 Glock 21 pistols in .45 ACP that were about to be dumped on the market.


PSP G21 Glock in CaseAnd dumped they have been. A Pennsylvania distributor got them and sold them at $425 dealer price. One has already shown up on GunBroker at an ask of $559.95 opening-bid / $609.95 Buy It Now .

Here’s how he describes the gun:

Up for auction is a USED Glock 21 Gen4 Pennsylvania State Police semi-auto pistol, 45ACP, 4.5″ barrel, 3-13rnd mags, 3 dot night sights, Black slide with PSP logo laser engraved, Factory hard case with thumb saver, Extra back straps (NO beaver tail straps).

Like other PSP guns, some of the guns have been reserved for troopers to buy. And here’s the result of that:

One dealer got 60 in for the troopers that bought. Most bought 3 or 4 and some bought 5 and 6. They got them for themselves and family members.

That suggests to us (as it did to our tipster) that the leadership may have lost confidence in the Glock 21, but the actual road troopers haven’t.

PSP G21 showing patch


Of course, it’s anyone’s guess how many of these G21s are Looking back, 2014 was a pretty awful year for the Pennsylvania State Police. We hope that they have a better 2015. And may all these orphaned Glocks find loving homes!q2


That Carter has a lot to answer for

This is a screencap of a real tweet (we dunno how to embed the actual tweet) from the network once known as the History Channel.


Is there anything that stinks more than TV? The guys who claim to be history experts can’t even nail down a major event within two centuries.

And… “colonist” troops? Well, who else was available to fight against the Dynamic Duo of British Imperialism, King George III and Lady Thatcher?

We probably shouldn’t be so shocked. Civics education these days means twelve years of iterative exposure to the same single shallow lesson about the Greatest American Ever, His Excellency Field Marshal Grand Exalted Luminescence Martin Luther King. So maybe the writers for the network are twenty-somethings, whose brains can be expected to be filled with mush. That would explain why they don’t know what happened in the Revolutionary War, what the armies engaged were called, or, well, much of anything about anything.

One of the many people who tweeted a response to the still-uncorrected, brain-dead Valley Forge tweet, Katie Warchol, made a plausible excuse for the History Channel: “Clearly, an intern wrote this.”

Great Googly Moogly, have you watched the channel, Katie? An intern writes all of it. And they’ve been doing their part in the hiring of the (mentally) handicapped. There’s no other explanation for some self-esteem snowflake arriving at the exit of grade school without a firm grasp on the significance (and timing) of Valley Forge.

The empty-headed bozos at the History Channel might be out of their depth writing about, you know, history. But hey, they can make them some UFO videos.

Maybe they should try making a “histology channel” or something. Because they’re certainly a rolling cluster*&^% as a History Channel.

Tune in next week when the History Channel explores the English Civil War, featuring the Cleveland Cavaliers versus the Phillips Heads.

Did we mention that TV basically sucks?


We Nearly Missed the 2014 Blue Falcon Stolen Valor Tournament

Where “Buddy” is only half a word….

Every year, the military blog This Ain’t Hell has what they call the Blue Falcon Stolen Valor Tournament, where the worst phony wannabee dipsheetz of the last year go head-to-head in a voter-driven tournament of whatever the antonym of military excellence is.

The crapulent contenders have already been boiled down to four, which include (in alphabetical order):

  • Bernath_DanielDaniel Bernath, a lawyer (ptui), whose recent response to being outed as a poser when his claims to be a Navy CPO were proven false, was kind of epic: he added a false claim to have been a SEAL. It’s kind of amazing anyone makes false SEAL claims, because of all the SOF orgs anywhere, the SEALs have kept the best and most definitive records, and you can always find out whether someone is a bona fide SEAL in very short order. Needless to say, Bernath has never been any closer to being a SEAL than having a real one, Don Shipley, call him out as a poser. (Most of the stuff on that uniform is phony).


  • Chevalier_DennisDenis Chevalier, who claims to be an LTC Air Force pilot, but whose actual military record is… a little more limited. Like, 20 days in the National Guard in Texas. Hell, even previous winner John Giduck, a phony SF and Ranger officer, actually made it 58 days, almost to the end of basic training. This guy’s a bigger loser than a previous champion loser… it’s just like the Olympics, just when you feel this area of human endeavor is maxed out, along comes some guy with a record-breaking performance. It ought to be an Oscar category: “Worst performance by an actor playing a soldier, sailor, airman or Marine.” But then the actors would be PO’d at him for pretending to be an actor.


  • Church_DerekDerek Church, who parades around in an XXXL uniform with SSG stripes, an 82nd combat patch, and a variety of unearned gongs including a Ranger beret, what looks like a CIB (grrrr….), and a Ranger Regiment beret. Note the mixed ribbons and medals, and marvel at this guy’s lack of self-awareness (not to mention, fashion sense). Yep, he’s the very model of a modern combat Ranger. Don’t they all have more “Chins” than the Taipei phone book? His actually military service peaked at PFC in the National Guard, which grueling duty he didn’t complete two full years of. (NTTAWWT, the Guard we mean, for the folks that stayed in — which Church didn’t — and did a deployment — ditto).


  • visconi_FrankFrank Visconi. Visconi was actually an honorably-discharged Marine Vietnam Vet. He was a supply clerk (which we’re sure you’ll agree, is a much underappreciated field of endeavor). Visconi, in later years, began claiming combat awards including the Purple Heart, about which his story has changed. He attempted to get the awards inserted in his military records but failed, and failed spectacularly: on appeal, he actually brought the case to the 6th Circuit Court of Appeals, which shot him down, noting that the Bronze Star and Purple Heart citations he provided were determined by the appropriate authorities to be, quote, “not authentic.”

We know what you’re thinking. Because it’s what we thought: “Why can’t they all win, or is it, lose?” Well, that’s just they way life is sometimes. You only get one best friend, one worst enemy, and one Blue Falcon Stolen Valor Tournament champion for 2014. But you do get to vote for two out of the four, and soon, for one of the two finalists.

For the other three, there’s always next year. Although Rumor Control says that past winner, military impersonator John Giduck is stirring, in his mountain fastness….

BREAKING: Eric Frein in Custody

We went to the FBI Most Wanted website for another purpose, and the first man on the list — Frein — had a CAPTURED label on his photo.

Frein was caught by US Marshals, outside of his hiding-place in a hangar at the abandoned Birchwood-Pocono Airpark airstrip. The FAA forced closure of the runway in 1996 and the resort, which had been a honeymoon retreat with heart-shaped tubs, closed around the same time; it’s been for sale but the structures are not only dated but in poor, unmaintained condition. This aerial view, from Freeman’s Abandoned Airfields site, shows the hangar where Frein had nested.


He was on foot, outside the hangar, when the Marshals set upon him. He resisted briefly. His rifle and pistol were not on his person; they were found inside the hangar.

We have been in touch with some jubilant Pennsylvania law enforcement types, and they are as proud of the professionalism that brought this cop-killer in alive (albeit with a bloody, possibly broken, nose) as they are of anything else.

A Federal agent had one detail to share: Frein was hauled off to face the music, secured with Corporal Bryon Dickson’s handcuffs. Dickson was the state trooper shot dead by Frein on 12 September; Trooper Alex Douglass was wounded in the attack on the State Police barracks at Blooming Grove.

Frein evaded capture for 48 days, after gunning down the two Pennsylvania State Police troopers at their barracks at shift-change time.

The authorities have said little about Frein’s motivations and intent while the manhunt was pending, but now that he is in custody they may release more of the information found on his computer. The only thing they have said about their discoveries there, is that it provides evidence that Frein planned the attack for a very long time.

Breaking: Senator Loses War College Degree for Fraud

Face of a Thesis Thief

Face of a Thesis Thief — appointed Senator, and disgraced officer,  John Walsh.

Remember John Walsh? No, not the anti-gun TV celebrity who turned a dead kid into fame and fortune, but the anti-gun appointed Senator from Montana, Dishonest John Walsh, who was going to save Big Sky for his party because of his “great military career?”

If the name rings a bell, maybe it’s because we covered the Thesis Thief back in July as part of an omnibus on military phonies in Congress, noted that political appointees sidetracked an investigation into his plagiarism later that month, and followed up with news of his withdrawal from the increasingly lopsided race. As we wrote that last time:

Walsh copied large portions of his Master’s paper at the Army War College from a variety of published, academic and think-tank works. He is expected to lose his USAWC degree of Master of Strategic Studies when an enquiry is complete. The exposure of Walsh’s plagiarism caused reporters to look at his checkered military record, and torpedoed a candidacy that was entirely dependent on the legend of Walsh as military leader.

(Walsh had been reprimanded for corruption and denied Federal recognition of his promotion to two-star general in the MT Army National Guard, forcing him to retire as a colonel).

Well, Dishonest John gets the last of his fifteen minutes of fame today, as the USAWC did indeed revoke his fraudulently-obtained degree and his status as a graduate.

The board of the Carlisle, Pennsylvania-based college took less than a day to hear the case and make its findings Aug. 22. But the process of appeal and review wasn’t completed until Friday.

“The board found that then Colonel John Walsh did commit the offense of plagiarism and thus his Master’s Degree and status as graduate of the U.S. Army War College should be revoked,” War College spokeswoman Carol Kerr said in a statement.

The review board’s report found the plagiarism “egregious.” A review of Walsh’s paper by the school’s director of communicative arts found little, if any, original language or research and that it was “primarily composed of verbatim liftings from other sources” presented as if they were Walsh’s own work.

“In short, the paper was plagiarized and … the plagiarism was intentional,” the review board said in its report.

Walsh didn’t do much fighting in his Army career, but he sure fought the inquiry board.

Walsh spoke to members of the review board by phone the day before it convened in August. He admitted that he plagiarized the paper, but he said it was a mistake. Walsh also said he was taking medication for PTSD and that one of the soldiers he commanded in Iraq in 2005 had committed suicide in March 2007.

The review board noted Walsh submitted several drafts of his paper, including before the suicide, and later submitted a version of the same paper for another class with the plagiarized passages intact.

The board said in its findings that other students have had similar or more serious issues during their time at the war college, but they were able to do the work “without resorting to plagiarism or other cheating.”

In other words, a REMF playing the PTSD card is probably in the wrong AO to get sympathy, with the officers of the War College.

He still didn’t give up, and had to be shot down again last week.

Walsh appealed the decision on Oct. 6. War College Commandant Major Gen. William Rapp rejected the appeal in a letter dated Friday.

But plagiarist, fraud, corrupt officer… whatever. He still has his friends in politics!

Former Gov. Brian Schweitzer, who appointed Walsh adjutant general, was among those who wrote a letter of support to the college’s review board. Schweitzer told The Associated Press on Friday that Walsh should be judged on “a lifetime of leadership” based on his three-decade rise through the National Guard and service in Iraq.

“That was the John Walsh I selected, not the John Walsh that was a literary scholar or a person who understood the nuances of grammar and putting things in quotations,” Schweitzer said.

Just for the record, Walsh didn’t choke on some arcane and minute peccadillo of the secret rules of graduate-level scholarship. He copied the whole goddamned thing without attribution, which gets you a zero anywhere from middle school on up, except maybe among politicians and unethical crooks — pardon the repetition. And then he put the bogus paper in again for another class. 

A bitter Walsh made a statement to the Missoulian newspaper (of Missoula, MT, naturally) that he “disagree[d] with the findings made by the War College,” and he apologized for “the plagiarism in my 2007 paper,” which he seemed to think got there without agency on his part. (That is possible. Perhaps he assigned some underling to write his papers for him. Not at all rare among state AGs, who tend to be — like Walsh — political figures conditioned to life above the law).

Oddly enough, the caning of the Thesis Thief hasn’t shown up on the Official Happy Talk Page USAWC In the News official page.

Be the Guy who Kicked Jesse Ventura’s Ass

Pred suit3No, not Chris Kyle. The other guy. Dude in Kirkwall, Scotland is selling a complete Predator suit for £4,800. We know some of you retired frogs working PSD have the money for the ultimate party suit.

If you don’t want to go to SEAL conventions and see Jesse leave by the back door, you could always stuff and mount it, in between your grizzly and lion mounts. From the ad:

Here I have an original Pete Mander AVP Predator suit, I am selling this as I really need the money for moving house.

The suit was fully custom made by Pete Mander and is unbelievably realistic, the suit is perfect down to the last detail.

The suit consists of (from the head down) :-

1- A set of latex and rubber dreadlocks.

2- Very real looking predator face mask.

3- The Scar & Celtic Biomasks.

4- Adjustable shoulder cannon.

5- 2x shoulder armour.

Pred suit4The ad, on the British sales website Gumtree, goes on and on in the sort of detail you’d expect from some cat in Scotland whose proudest possession is an $8,000 Predator costume. (What odds he works in the software industry?)

Technically, this is the later Predator from the movie AVP: Alien vs. Predator, but it’s definitely close enough for Hollywood. It’s got to be close enough to ruin Ventura’s day.

And you could probably make the money back PDQ in free drinks from frogmen.

Jesse Ventura Summons the Streisand Effect

Jesse Ventura says he sued Chris, and then after Chris’s death, Taya, Kyle to protect his reputation. Two words: “Streisand Effect.” Even if Kyle’s story wasn’t true (and the testimony was certainly contradictory), it was probably better for him to be known as Glass Jaw Janos than to get the grief he’s getting now, as SOF guys and SEALS pile on him and make him out to be the King of the Blue Falcons. Here’s one image rocketing around the net:

Jesse Ventura widow suit


Keep it up, Jesse. “It’s only a flesh wound!” Yeah, that’ll buff right out. Here’s another:

Jesse Ventura hit me

That’s completely unfair, because Jesse sued Chris while he was still among us, and just persisted in his suit after Chris’s murder gave him the chance to make a statesmanlike exit. But that’s the nature of the Streisand Effect: the whole Intertubes piles on. The internet is not where you go to find fairness, or kindness, or restraint. But it is where you find your real reputation, for good or for ill.

Marcus Luttrell, who’s the kind of nobody that doesn’t act in movies but has movies made about him, got his licks in on his Facebook page. At press time, “Tim Ritter, Joseph Burch, Sebastian Smith and 72,344 others like this.” Ventura may not care: before paying a third to a half of it to his attorneys, he’s got $24.88 per “like” of Marcus’s Facebook slam of him. And, as Jesse’s noted, it’s not like he’s going to be blowing it on booze at SEAL conventions any time soon.

That SEAL/UDT “Never Quit” can work against a guy, as Ventura seems doomed to learn. But he has doubled down, saying he’s now going to sue the publisher and more people, because all those people are besmirching his stellar reputation. How can you besmirch a reputation like Ventura’s?

Jonn Lilyea at TAH:

As soon as he left the courtroom, Jimmy went straight to Russia Today studios for his first interview. During that interview, he told the audience that they shouldn’t be mad at him, they should be mad at the jury for finding in his favor and awarding him $1.8 million. Of course, he could have dropped the law suit when Chris Kyle was murdered. He does some more whining…

“I’m already damaged…. I can’t go to a SEAL reunion anymore. That was the one place where I always felt safe. I can’t go there anymore without looking over my shoulder now wondering who is going to come after me next.”

As Jonn points out, if whoever’s “next” is really next, doesn’t that suggest Chris Kyle was first?

(Note: references to “Jimmy” or “Janos” refer to Jesse Ventura’s birth name, James Janos, under which he served in the Navy UDT. He later took the stage name “Jesse Ventura” and still later changed his name legally to his stage identity. That’s why you see people mocking him by several names).

Let a Thousand Streisands Bloom

Here’s SF retiree “Uncle Jimbo” Hanson in a brief, profane video that can be summarized as, “Don’t take the money, assclown.” Hanson writes, “I think this is worth some internet torches and pitchforks….” (See comments above about the Streisand Effect, Jim has nailed a perfect analogy).

Laughing Wolf (C. Blake Powers) at Blackfive posted another hilarious picture under the title Janos the Anos. We don’t think he likes him.

Humberto Fontova, one of the wonderful gifts that Castroite oppression gave these United States, collects some dreamy Ventura quotes about Fidel Castro and his Cuba. Essence: better than the USG, says the rassler. Lord love a duck, this guy had a reputation?

As a former editor of a nationally significant newspaper, Robert S. McCain had to learn about libel and defamation law. He explains that that Kyle did something a journalist would (or should) not do:

He asserted private knowledge.
This is a line that no smart journalist would ever cross: To claim to know something bad about somebody, a private fact otherwise unknown, on the basis of information not publicly available.
Any reporter could publish a story about the conflict between Ventura and Kyle — the alleged barroom confrontation at the heart of this lawsuit — and write that Kyle says X, Y and Z happened, including Ventura’s denials that any such confrontation occurred, without fear that his reporting could be construed as libelous.
Kyle’s problem was that, if his altercation with Ventura actually occurred, it was not a matter of public record. Nobody called the cops; there was no police report filed. In fact, it appears that Kyle’s editors at Harper Collins recognized the potential liability involved in publishing that anecdote, so that Kyle’s book referred to Ventura as “scruff face.” It was only in subsequent media interviews that Kyle himself said that Ventura was the subject of the anecdote, and thus the truth or falsehood of Kyle’s version of events — his claim that Ventura said vile things, and that he knocked Ventura down — was central to the defamation lawsuit.

But that importance of truth or untruth suggests that it might not be over for Ventura in another way: given the judge’s remarkable jury instruction that the truth or falsehood of what Kyle said didn’t matter at all, Ventura’s success is at risk if Taya Kyle appeals:

I do not believe this case was correctly decided. In a defamation case, the burden is on the plaintiff to prove that the defendant knowingly or recklessly published a falsehood. Based on what has been reported of the trial, Ventura and his witnesses cast doubt on Kyle’s story, but did not disprove it, as witnesses for the defense testified that Kyle told the truth.
If lawyers for Kyle’s estate appeal the case, I feel they have a good chance to overturn the verdict.

Like McCain, whose expertise in this realm of law we respect, we don’t know what happened that night. We do know that Jesse Ventura is a jerk, and Chris Kyle wasn’t, and that certainly colors our perception of the hostility that arose between the two of them.

If we may be forgiven a display of the other branch’s insignia, for a moment:

Keep Calm and Honor Chris

Our Recommendation:

Let’s take arguendo the claim that Jesse only did this to protect his reputation. It’s possible; he wouldn’t be the first or only guy to have a higher opinion of himself than everyone else does. He still has a possibility for a graceful exit and we’ve already suggested it in a reply to a comment in the previous thread: donate the money to a neutral, SEAL or SOF charity (like the SEAL Foundation or the Special Operations Warrior Foundation). Better yet, do it as a joint donation from Jesse and Taya Kyle, and very, very publicly bury the hatchet. That’s his best, and unless we’re missing something, only, path to reputational recovery. If we were Jesse, we’d be having our expensive lawyers discuss this with Taya’s expensive lawyers already.

But then again, if we were Jesse, we wouldn’t be mired in a reputational problem caused by mouthing off in a bar.

The Fix is In on “Dishonest John” Walsh

vote for felonsAccording to the Billings, Montana, Gazettepolitical appointees at the Department of Defense have taken control of the investigation in the War College paper of appointed Senator John Walsh. The bulk of the thesis, including all of its conclusions, previously appeared in other publications under other bylines; not to put too fine a point on it, “Dishonest John” Walsh’s submission, for which he was granted a Master of Science in Strategic Studies degree, was fundamentally not his work. But Dishonest John is an important political ally for the Administration and Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel. So Hagel has stepped in and seized control of the investigation, apparently intending to prevent any consequences for Dishonest John. From here on out, the “investigation” will be stage-managed by DOD political appointees.

A U.S. Army War College official says the Department of Defense has taken the unusual step of overseeing a plagiarism investigation against Sen. John Walsh of Montana. The Carlisle, Pennsylvania, college began the investigation after a New York Times story showed Walsh used others’ work without attribution in a 2007 research paper required for a master’s degree.

Knowing that this has been taken away from biased, shifty military officers and given to selfless public servants whose mortgage payments and kids’ tuitions depend on staying in the good graces of the politician under investigation and his cronies certainly ought to boost your confidence in the integrity of the investigation. The War College has, in recent years, revoked six degrees for plagiarism. The DOD never stepped in to protect a plagiarist before. Gee, what’s different about Dishonest John? Hat tip, the Chronicle of Higher Education (of all things).

Breaking: Scruff Face Wins

When he was clean-shaven, and had a career (>30 years ago)

When he was clean-shaven, and had a career (30 years ago).

We didn’t see this coming…

Although verdicts in such cases are customarily unanimous, both sides agreed to a split verdict. The verdict of 8 to 2 was reached after more than a week of deliberations. Jurors awarded Mr. Ventura $500,000 for defamation and $1.3 million for what was termed the author’s unjust enrichment.

via Jesse Ventura Wins Defamation Case –

We hope he enjoys the money.

Does he think his reputation was worth it? Because that’s taken a bigger Streisand Effect hit from the suit than it did from the story in American Sniper — and both of those clobberin’s are bigger than the belt he took (or didn’t) to the jaw.

TSA Mongs Reach Deeper in Your Pocket

tsa-security-theaterFor the billions wasted on the Transportation Security Theater Agency (the direct cost of the failed agency is approaching $10B a year), and the complete lack of performance of the agency (the number of terrorists caught and/or terror plots thwarted by TSA is holding at 0), the agency is doing what government agencies do: grabbing more money. Directly from travelers.

A security fee that the government charges airline passengers more than doubled on Monday, from $2.50 to $5.60.

Lawmakers last year approved an increase in the fee, which is tacked onto the cost of airplane tickets, as part of a budget agreement.

Additionally, passengers will be charged twice if they have a layover for a connecting flight….

“Due to new @TSA fee hike, travelers will pay a billion dollars more per year in added taxes/fees thanks to U.S. [government],” Airlines for American President Nick Calio tweeted recently.

via TSA fee on plane tickets more than doubles | TheHill.

There is no limit to the greed of these payroll patriots. And there’s no accountability for their failures. The director who built a multimillion-dollar Xanadu office? No consequences. The hundreds, if not thousands, of TSA agents who steal from travelers? No consequences (in the worst case, they are quietly fired with a neutral reference). The abuses of Behavioral Detection Officer quackery? No consequences. Mismanagement at every level? No consequences.

No one good, decent, honest, competent, moral, ethical or intelligent has ever been employed at TSA in any capacity whatsoever.